- Joined
- Apr 22, 2014
- Messages
- 31
Went to a larger city this weekend to a venue that had multiple bars in one building. My goal for the weekend was to expand my direct open game, and to eliminate the small remaining remnants of my approach anxiety. IWe went out last night, and I had to leave early the next morning to head home. My goal for the evening was as many quality, direct opens as possible in the timeframe that we would be there. I was also experimenting with how direct my opens were with attainability. I wore simple white chino shorts, white Sperrys, and a ferrari red long sleeve shirt (my typical bar/club attire normally toes the line between Express-esque casual and business casual.) Anyway, the building was a large warehouse style structure with an upper floor that had three bars. The upper portion however was more of a grand balcony that could look down over the giant dancefloor/other bars on the first floor. The place was mostly populated with 20 something's to I would venture to guess at most very early thirties. This vibe in this place was pure energy and excitement, and it was palpable. Even the country style bar there was very current and modern. Most of the girls here were dressed in what I would consider club attire (tight jeans and tops and heels or various dresses and hair do's with heels), point being, it felt like everyone in the place everywhere I looked was there to see or be seen, and everyone knew it. Anyway, to the point. I wound up opening about 8 or 9 girls that evening and getting a number from all but one of them. I won't cover all of them, first because I didn't want to spam the board with a bunch of similar FR's, but secondly because some were fairly similar in technique, and outcome, however I will share my favorites and the moments which I thought were pivotal, as I felt last night was a turning point in my PU abilities.
My first interaction began shortly after my party getting drinks. My energy was up, I was excited, but still slightly apprehensive. There were LOTS of very attractive girls around to choose from, and passing by frequently. All of the guy in my party at this point were kind of on the wall-ing at this point. Hanging out in a circle, not conversing all that much (blaring music featured around a large mechanical bull, which had one hell of a line for it, and at the moment, featured a female employee in heels standing on it doing a very sultry little show.) Every time a female possibility caught my eye, my first thought would be "Damn' that girl is a (8-10, has a huge ass, etc. etc.)" I normally try to stray away from this thinking and focus on black and white is she cute or not, however I had a momentary lapse. Then I snapped back and realized how static the group I was with was being, and very obviously so, as we we're sore thumbs socially by the bar. I look around at a couple of guys that were in my group and asked if they wanted to try opening a few girls with me to try and get the momentum with the group going for the evening, however they wish washed and ho hummed. It was at this point, I spotted a girl headed in our direction with a friend following behind her. It was the kind of packed that I had to make sure any guys around them weren't also following them. I stared long enough for the girl in front to catch my gaze. I diverted my attention and smiled, and then immediately looked back (at this point she was about 10 feet from me) and our eyes met again. She was hot, long straight blond hair, stacked chest and behind, small waist, black dress, good teeth. I turned back to the two guys I had asked if they wanted to open earlier and said "Fine, fuck this.", and turned away from the group as the blonde was walking past and pointed down, keeping eye contact with her. She slowed and I waited a couple seconds before speaking.
At this point a couple guys walk over with another girl. they stand by but mill amongst themselves, awaiting to rejoin the other two when they are done talking to me.
It's at this point I look over to the other sister, and birthday girl is pale. This conversation wasn't going very far anyway, I'm fairly disinterested, considering I don't plan on pushing for anything more than a number, which at this point I'm also uninterested trying to maneuver. Time to get these guys out of here and find a new open.
I turn and rejoin my group, who is staring at me. I ask what and they don't say much. I guess I should have prefaced this group with, I only had known one of them before tonight, and he had his girlfriend with him tonight. I sip on my beer and try to find another girl to approach, which didn't take long. I spot two girls standing watching people try and ride this mechanical bull. I walk over and stand to the side of one of them, but say nothing. I watch for a couple minutes, take a few sips of beer and let my presence next to her settle in a bit. I then turn to her and say,
I touch the back of her elbow with a couple fingers and gently pull stepping back, she looks around and sees a fresh slew of people trying to walk between the bar and the bull stage (it's a narrow and very busy area right now). She follows me, and I walk backwards and lean against the back of the bar and remove my hand once she standing a foot in front of me.
I purposefully had backed over to the group earlier so that I could set this exchange up, and isolate her from her friend. I knew full well that no one in my group at this point would would talk to this girl or make any real moves, so I knew it was safe. I introduce her to the rest of the group, and then turn away from them enough to still be involved in the group, but enough to make her turn as well and refocus back on me. I find out that she had a job with a car company, but had switched to a company who hires CEO's to other companies, a headhunter. I tease her about how big her ego must be and how many high and mighty's she must know, and she downplays this with laughter and hair flipping, which I call her out on. I ask her what she would do if she could get into anything and she replied marketing. I probe deeper and ask what her dream company would be to market for and she said coke because of some affiliation that her dad had with the company once. I inform her that due to my profession, I know a lot of people in STL in that business, and that I would love to grab drinks with her one night in the coming week and talk more over everything. Throughout this whole time, I've had my hand on her right hip, and have been slowly pulling her closer to me. The point at which she heard that I was on name basis with some influential people in the industry, her demeanor became more flirty, and her hands moved to my chest when I mentioned getting drinks and talking more about things, which is what I was trying to screen for, her interest wavers with what someone can offer her that benefits her. In any case she agrees obviously and I tell her to take my number and shoot me a text real quick with her first and last name, which she does. I tell her I'll get with her later that week and that I have to go but I'll be in touch. She smiles and turns to rejoin her friend who has since moved, so she goes to search for her and I carry on with my evening.
At this point my group wanted to migrate to the other side of the bar that we were at to an area where there was a square bar in the center of the room and a dane floor adjacent to it. On the way over I passed a smaller blonde girl in a white spartan style dress and flats, a head band, and a long gold chain. I commented on this in passing, hey that's a really nice piece, and kept moving. We got to the bar and ordered another round of drinks and hung out/socialized with each other for a bit. I spot this dime in a blue top, white pants, and had long dark hair sitting on a stool next to her friend who seems to be getting hit on. The girl in blue is heavily on and off her phone. Perfect. At this point, I've had a high success rate, my confidence is up, and my notgiveafuck is cranked. I walk over to her (she's entrenched in her phone right now). I lightly put my right hand on the side of her knee (these barstools are by a table, but facing outward in the room) wait a couple seconds and then:
He introduces himself and we shake hands and I move to the girl in the middle I thought was being hit on and introduce myself to her as well. I lead a spirited chat for a while about where they are all from, what brought them there tonight, where there favorite spots in town were, so on and so forth. At some point in the conversation, the girl in blue gets back on her phone. I realize I probably let her straggle mentally and didn't direct enough attention to her and correct this immediately.
We finish the conversation out to a lull and I use this opportunity to break away and rejoin my group.
I give her my number and have her text me her first and last name, I tell her I'll hit her up later this week sometime for drinks and such and she smiles and agrees I give her thigh a gentle squeeze, then a pat on the side of her leg, tell the group it was great to meet them all and then rejoin my group. As the night draws to a close I do a couple more direct approaches of which I'm feeling completely at home with now. I even opened an entire bachelorette party at one point, and by the end the conversation the bride to be was initiating physical contact by touching my arms and back, and playing with her hair intensely. There was even a point in the evening when we were all leaving that I saw a guy walking with a girl I had seen him pick up earlier in the evening to the bathroom where she went in and he waited outside. As soon as the door shut behind her, and everyone had been watching her walk in do to her mini skirt and giant ass, I walked over to him and gave him a couple firm pats on the chest and told him damn fine fucking pull and he shook my hand and cracked up.
SO, what's my take home from this evening?
1) I am now 100% comfortable with approaching any girl, anywhere.My approach anxiety is completely gone. Trial by fire baby! My old design professor used to give us this advice that you have so much shit work that you're going to design and do before you start getting good. Every person has X amount of crap that they're going to produce, mistakes to make, and lessons to learn before they learn oh, I shouldn't do that, and when I have that kind of situation to deal with, I should instead do this. After that moment, you start getting better and better. I think that applies to PU a lot. You just have to do it again and again and again and eventually you start recognizing signs and patterns and things just become second nature reactionary because you've seen them so many times that you grow comfortable and accustomed. Long story short, 100% comfortable with approaching any girl, anywhere now.
2) Go into the night, not with the mentality of "I'm trying to get laiiiddd tonight!" Go into you evening, and any set with the idea of trying to just turn this girl on. Take your time. Every touch, eye gesture, body movement, and word you say should serve in the process of trying to make this girl practically want to rip your clothes off. Throw in some pre screening (like the girl who became overly friendly at the mention of me owning a small company and being able to help her out), stacked compliance, and light teasing / sarcastic remarks while asking lots of questions (never forget people love to talk about themselves whether they want to admit it or not) and there's almost no way you won't at minimum have
at least a decent conversation and meet some new people.
3) Surround yourself with other guys who will be spontaneous and random and at least have enough social calibration to keep up with you. Who you surround yourself with is key when you go out with people. While I had pretty good success on the evening, it was excruciating at times to be standing in a vibrant, energized bar, and have three or four guys stand on the wall and stir their drinks and "just hang out and chill". If you hang out with these kind of guys, you're associated as one of them and there's a chance for auto rejection unless you are direct enough to make an impression. Besides , you want to surround yourself in life anyways with people who wil push you outside of your comfort zone constantly and keep you trying new things and experiencing life. Which I never completely was aware of until I had to play the role of the pusher and make my own evening of things.
Hopefully this was an entertaining read for you all. It was a game changing night for me and one that I feel so fortunate to have had, and would never had experienced if I hadn't thrown myself into it, took risks, and made it happen.
As always, good luck with your own PU endeavors!
- The Marksman
My first interaction began shortly after my party getting drinks. My energy was up, I was excited, but still slightly apprehensive. There were LOTS of very attractive girls around to choose from, and passing by frequently. All of the guy in my party at this point were kind of on the wall-ing at this point. Hanging out in a circle, not conversing all that much (blaring music featured around a large mechanical bull, which had one hell of a line for it, and at the moment, featured a female employee in heels standing on it doing a very sultry little show.) Every time a female possibility caught my eye, my first thought would be "Damn' that girl is a (8-10, has a huge ass, etc. etc.)" I normally try to stray away from this thinking and focus on black and white is she cute or not, however I had a momentary lapse. Then I snapped back and realized how static the group I was with was being, and very obviously so, as we we're sore thumbs socially by the bar. I look around at a couple of guys that were in my group and asked if they wanted to try opening a few girls with me to try and get the momentum with the group going for the evening, however they wish washed and ho hummed. It was at this point, I spotted a girl headed in our direction with a friend following behind her. It was the kind of packed that I had to make sure any guys around them weren't also following them. I stared long enough for the girl in front to catch my gaze. I diverted my attention and smiled, and then immediately looked back (at this point she was about 10 feet from me) and our eyes met again. She was hot, long straight blond hair, stacked chest and behind, small waist, black dress, good teeth. I turned back to the two guys I had asked if they wanted to open earlier and said "Fine, fuck this.", and turned away from the group as the blonde was walking past and pointed down, keeping eye contact with her. She slowed and I waited a couple seconds before speaking.
At this point a couple guys walk over with another girl. they stand by but mill amongst themselves, awaiting to rejoin the other two when they are done talking to me.
It's at this point I look over to the other sister, and birthday girl is pale. This conversation wasn't going very far anyway, I'm fairly disinterested, considering I don't plan on pushing for anything more than a number, which at this point I'm also uninterested trying to maneuver. Time to get these guys out of here and find a new open.
(
I turn and rejoin my group, who is staring at me. I ask what and they don't say much. I guess I should have prefaced this group with, I only had known one of them before tonight, and he had his girlfriend with him tonight. I sip on my beer and try to find another girl to approach, which didn't take long. I spot two girls standing watching people try and ride this mechanical bull. I walk over and stand to the side of one of them, but say nothing. I watch for a couple minutes, take a few sips of beer and let my presence next to her settle in a bit. I then turn to her and say,
I touch the back of her elbow with a couple fingers and gently pull stepping back, she looks around and sees a fresh slew of people trying to walk between the bar and the bull stage (it's a narrow and very busy area right now). She follows me, and I walk backwards and lean against the back of the bar and remove my hand once she standing a foot in front of me.
I purposefully had backed over to the group earlier so that I could set this exchange up, and isolate her from her friend. I knew full well that no one in my group at this point would would talk to this girl or make any real moves, so I knew it was safe. I introduce her to the rest of the group, and then turn away from them enough to still be involved in the group, but enough to make her turn as well and refocus back on me. I find out that she had a job with a car company, but had switched to a company who hires CEO's to other companies, a headhunter. I tease her about how big her ego must be and how many high and mighty's she must know, and she downplays this with laughter and hair flipping, which I call her out on. I ask her what she would do if she could get into anything and she replied marketing. I probe deeper and ask what her dream company would be to market for and she said coke because of some affiliation that her dad had with the company once. I inform her that due to my profession, I know a lot of people in STL in that business, and that I would love to grab drinks with her one night in the coming week and talk more over everything. Throughout this whole time, I've had my hand on her right hip, and have been slowly pulling her closer to me. The point at which she heard that I was on name basis with some influential people in the industry, her demeanor became more flirty, and her hands moved to my chest when I mentioned getting drinks and talking more about things, which is what I was trying to screen for, her interest wavers with what someone can offer her that benefits her. In any case she agrees obviously and I tell her to take my number and shoot me a text real quick with her first and last name, which she does. I tell her I'll get with her later that week and that I have to go but I'll be in touch. She smiles and turns to rejoin her friend who has since moved, so she goes to search for her and I carry on with my evening.
At this point my group wanted to migrate to the other side of the bar that we were at to an area where there was a square bar in the center of the room and a dane floor adjacent to it. On the way over I passed a smaller blonde girl in a white spartan style dress and flats, a head band, and a long gold chain. I commented on this in passing, hey that's a really nice piece, and kept moving. We got to the bar and ordered another round of drinks and hung out/socialized with each other for a bit. I spot this dime in a blue top, white pants, and had long dark hair sitting on a stool next to her friend who seems to be getting hit on. The girl in blue is heavily on and off her phone. Perfect. At this point, I've had a high success rate, my confidence is up, and my notgiveafuck is cranked. I walk over to her (she's entrenched in her phone right now). I lightly put my right hand on the side of her knee (these barstools are by a table, but facing outward in the room) wait a couple seconds and then:
Me: Hey...My name's Marksman.
Herlooks up, very surprised, but her facial features don't have any sign of disinterest and she never even twitched her knee) Uh Hi
Me: Your friend seemed...busy and you looked bored so I thought I would come over and chat and keep you company until she was done, if you're not interested and would rather go back to your phone that's fine (at this point I'm teasingly smiling and my hand has rotated to a thumb on one side of the knee and the rest on the top of her leg, no pressure, just resting there) but I thought you might enjoy being rescued haha.
Her: hahaha well thanks! She's actually not getting hit on though we all know each other, we're from the same town, they were just talking.
Me: Gotcha well that explains a lot ha (I turn to the male in the group) great to meet you man, I'm Marksman.
He introduces himself and we shake hands and I move to the girl in the middle I thought was being hit on and introduce myself to her as well. I lead a spirited chat for a while about where they are all from, what brought them there tonight, where there favorite spots in town were, so on and so forth. At some point in the conversation, the girl in blue gets back on her phone. I realize I probably let her straggle mentally and didn't direct enough attention to her and correct this immediately.
We finish the conversation out to a lull and I use this opportunity to break away and rejoin my group.
I give her my number and have her text me her first and last name, I tell her I'll hit her up later this week sometime for drinks and such and she smiles and agrees I give her thigh a gentle squeeze, then a pat on the side of her leg, tell the group it was great to meet them all and then rejoin my group. As the night draws to a close I do a couple more direct approaches of which I'm feeling completely at home with now. I even opened an entire bachelorette party at one point, and by the end the conversation the bride to be was initiating physical contact by touching my arms and back, and playing with her hair intensely. There was even a point in the evening when we were all leaving that I saw a guy walking with a girl I had seen him pick up earlier in the evening to the bathroom where she went in and he waited outside. As soon as the door shut behind her, and everyone had been watching her walk in do to her mini skirt and giant ass, I walked over to him and gave him a couple firm pats on the chest and told him damn fine fucking pull and he shook my hand and cracked up.
SO, what's my take home from this evening?
1) I am now 100% comfortable with approaching any girl, anywhere.My approach anxiety is completely gone. Trial by fire baby! My old design professor used to give us this advice that you have so much shit work that you're going to design and do before you start getting good. Every person has X amount of crap that they're going to produce, mistakes to make, and lessons to learn before they learn oh, I shouldn't do that, and when I have that kind of situation to deal with, I should instead do this. After that moment, you start getting better and better. I think that applies to PU a lot. You just have to do it again and again and again and eventually you start recognizing signs and patterns and things just become second nature reactionary because you've seen them so many times that you grow comfortable and accustomed. Long story short, 100% comfortable with approaching any girl, anywhere now.
2) Go into the night, not with the mentality of "I'm trying to get laiiiddd tonight!" Go into you evening, and any set with the idea of trying to just turn this girl on. Take your time. Every touch, eye gesture, body movement, and word you say should serve in the process of trying to make this girl practically want to rip your clothes off. Throw in some pre screening (like the girl who became overly friendly at the mention of me owning a small company and being able to help her out), stacked compliance, and light teasing / sarcastic remarks while asking lots of questions (never forget people love to talk about themselves whether they want to admit it or not) and there's almost no way you won't at minimum have
at least a decent conversation and meet some new people.
3) Surround yourself with other guys who will be spontaneous and random and at least have enough social calibration to keep up with you. Who you surround yourself with is key when you go out with people. While I had pretty good success on the evening, it was excruciating at times to be standing in a vibrant, energized bar, and have three or four guys stand on the wall and stir their drinks and "just hang out and chill". If you hang out with these kind of guys, you're associated as one of them and there's a chance for auto rejection unless you are direct enough to make an impression. Besides , you want to surround yourself in life anyways with people who wil push you outside of your comfort zone constantly and keep you trying new things and experiencing life. Which I never completely was aware of until I had to play the role of the pusher and make my own evening of things.
Hopefully this was an entertaining read for you all. It was a game changing night for me and one that I feel so fortunate to have had, and would never had experienced if I hadn't thrown myself into it, took risks, and made it happen.
As always, good luck with your own PU endeavors!
- The Marksman
