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FU  a gross hilarious warning of what's out there

HellAtlantic

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 1, 2015
Messages
301
Ouch, couldn't you have least closed your eyes and pretended she was someone else? Lol
 

Smurf

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Apr 7, 2013
Messages
714
That would've fucked me up for sure. Funny that you had to put up LMR though, that must've been fun haha

Jake.
 

Big Daddy

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jan 26, 2013
Messages
707
Dude, I know I shouldn't have standards when it comes to bedding random girls, but... shit like that grosses the shit out of me too, I can't do it hahaha
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

ray_zorse

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Aug 12, 2014
Messages
1,982
Hmm yeah well I picked up a cute 50yo before I discovered girlschase, I asked for her number in a bar (had been at a buck's turn I think, went to the races that day and ended up on a pub crawl with the boys), I was pretty surprised when she said "sure, but just so you know I am 50, is that going to be a problem?" and I was like "no way, really?... sure, I don't care, you are cute and age isn't an issue... besides, I'm a lot older than I look, anyway"... so I took her for dinner the following week and back to my place, anyway got her clothes off and I was not terribly attracted at that point, she had this like huge scar across her stomach and it turns out she had had a tummy tuck... which isn't too big of an issue except that it was only some months back, and the scar was still pretty red, apparently it fades to a white in time. However, the dealbreaker for me was mainly the nipple hair, I'm normally pretty forgiving of people's bodies but I really did not like the nipple hair, wanted to rip it out but didn't know what to say. A shame because her tits were actually pretty cute for a 50yo. I ended up not being able to get it up for her, which is a shame. But we still had fun. Incidentally she has the same name as my current gf, and after I cold approached my current gf, I accidentally texted this 50yo first, hahaha, so I had to call her and explain, ended up talking to her for an hour about the other dudes she's dating etc. Anyway, I thought you'd be interested in this story for the perspective, on what it would be like, if your cute girl with the 50yo skin, did actually go ahead, and get the tummy tuck etc.
Ray
PS. I think you should have practiced your mental control and see if you could get it up and fuck her regardless. I did this with a morbidly obese woman early in my journey who was actually a pretty good girl, I had 2 or 3 sessions with her (some of them pretty drunken) and the most I could manage was a semi, I still would have fucked her except it was hard to find the opening. I MAYBE got it in briefly, haha. Now I think I could do it.
 

snipefield

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 14, 2013
Messages
230
Radeng, this report put a smile on my face on my way to work. I think it's because as you wrote, it hints at the absurdity that is life sometimes.

Here we are expending considerable mental and physical energy to meet women only to get something that we sometimes can't even get it up for.

Really enjoy reading your reports!
 

demainor

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Mar 30, 2014
Messages
140
hey, if l cld shag a chick who is semi-cripled whose one boob was horribly wrinked like a month old tomato, yu could have made it ;) granted, i was on my bed bug nightmare 5 month dryspell so who am l to talk?
 

ocantu1987

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Dec 6, 2012
Messages
401
Dang I would be proud if I could bring any girl home from a bar. It feels hard to do for me.
 

Raqimus

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jun 22, 2014
Messages
460
Could of used the skin as handle's while railing her from the back, would of been quite the sight lol
 

TheChased

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Aug 18, 2015
Messages
65
I have been drinking a little bit now, but this shit was extraordinary funny! I have been reading your journal. Almost done with it, so I kinda feel like I know you more. Which makes it much funnier! What got me cracking was this:

She kept repeating "you do realize you have a completely naked cute girl beside you who wants your dick and wants you to do bad things to me right?" And I was just like "uhh yeah idk we just met I don't want to be a slut" lmao. I had to put up LMR all night. Soo funny. I'm pretty sure I used all the standard LMR lines.

"I don't really know you" and "You're moving to fast", hahaha. And then, to top it all off... Ray's story! Hahahah, you guys are amazing!

However, the dealbreaker for me was mainly the nipple hair, I'm normally pretty forgiving of people's bodies but I really did not like the nipple hair, wanted to rip it out but didn't know what to say. A shame because her tits were actually pretty cute for a 50yo. I ended up not being able to get it up for her, which is a shame.

Too funny, I have shagged a 39yo(I'm 23), with two kids. Did have a problem getting it up, but it came along after she blew me for like 20mins. She was pretty nice for her age tho, just her tummy, that grossed me out a little, and I could see her hair in the face when light shined on her. Anyways, I proceeded to shag her for like 5mins, but then it went down again.. So she gave me a bj again, and then I just came. I just gave up.. So I know where you're coming from! You guys are funny, makes me wanna meet you and go hunting girls with you.

Yours truly
-TC
 

Paulie Walnuts

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
183
I was supposed to go out with a midget tonight (but I have the flu/really bad cold) AND I'M FUCKING EXCITED! It's on my bucket list to fuck a midget :) :) :) (I'm a bit strange lol)
 
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