- Joined
- Jan 5, 2014
- Messages
- 3,353
With guys like Big Daddy, new users and a year ago even me wondering about this, I believe this thread was long overdue. I might write a more expansive guide later but the truth is, social life is a massive pain point for most men after college, at least a quality social life that is. It is time we got down to the nitty gritty of it all but until then, thought I'd share this hack.
Let's define a “cool social life” first.
Most of us are not looking to go to MeetUp groups full of gamers, older people with families and people that you can’t really brag about hanging out with. A lot of us simply want a social life which can grant us access to hot girls, exclusive parties, cool friends and hedonistic memories we can actually look back on. In high school this meant hanging out with the popular kids who had the best parties thrown. In college this meant being in the best fraternity or social crew on campus, the same ones a lot of the hot girls ran in.
Notice the trend here? Cool social life is pretty much synonymous with crews and places where hot girls gather. A software engineer making six figures might not count as “cool” because hot girls are not lining up in those crews. The DJ at a nightclub will likely count as being cool because hot girls are gathering to be a part of his crew but that isn’t the only path.
But here’s the reality...
After college, social life kinda sucks. Majority of the cool kids already had their fun and formed their crew, they don’t need or even want anymore friends. A lot of the people who were cool in college have settled down into relationships or have already gone towards a marriage. The people who were cool and single in college do not need anymore friends, they are full. What you have left are a lot of socially undesirable company such as bitter old guys coming off a divorce and weird guys with dorky quirks and hobbies you can’t introduce to women.
Most guy friends you run into will suck, they won't improve your social life or make it quality. Most of the times you will get the opposite of the type of social life that gives you status and makes you desirable to hot girl or gets you the quality social life. It is easy to make friends to whine about life and women about or to waste time with, quality guy friends are very tough to make. So as you can see, it does not help to try hard in making friends with guys, its mostly a futile effort.
So here is the hack.
You actually develop relationships with the women you click with, especially if they have the looks going for them.
If you are on this forum, you should be working on this anyways, you have the best guides out there.
No more one night stands and shoving them out of the bed the next morning. Instead you genuinely try to develop a relationship with them. I do not mean an LTR or anything of the sort, you can if you want, I mean actually being cool with being their friend, FWB or keeping in touch with them. You add them on social media (which is a mandatory these days anyways), befriend their friends, hang out with their crew and keep on expanding from that. The guys you meet through women will also be more receptive since you have a girl as an in.
It might be tough now that you have a full time job but you actually care about some of the girls you are with. You try to get to know them and their crew, genuinely interact with them. Most importantly, you let them add you on social media and other mediums, growing your social life through them. Then through them, you meet more and more people that are cool.
Who knows where eventually get with this!
Let's define a “cool social life” first.
Most of us are not looking to go to MeetUp groups full of gamers, older people with families and people that you can’t really brag about hanging out with. A lot of us simply want a social life which can grant us access to hot girls, exclusive parties, cool friends and hedonistic memories we can actually look back on. In high school this meant hanging out with the popular kids who had the best parties thrown. In college this meant being in the best fraternity or social crew on campus, the same ones a lot of the hot girls ran in.
Notice the trend here? Cool social life is pretty much synonymous with crews and places where hot girls gather. A software engineer making six figures might not count as “cool” because hot girls are not lining up in those crews. The DJ at a nightclub will likely count as being cool because hot girls are gathering to be a part of his crew but that isn’t the only path.
But here’s the reality...
After college, social life kinda sucks. Majority of the cool kids already had their fun and formed their crew, they don’t need or even want anymore friends. A lot of the people who were cool in college have settled down into relationships or have already gone towards a marriage. The people who were cool and single in college do not need anymore friends, they are full. What you have left are a lot of socially undesirable company such as bitter old guys coming off a divorce and weird guys with dorky quirks and hobbies you can’t introduce to women.
Most guy friends you run into will suck, they won't improve your social life or make it quality. Most of the times you will get the opposite of the type of social life that gives you status and makes you desirable to hot girl or gets you the quality social life. It is easy to make friends to whine about life and women about or to waste time with, quality guy friends are very tough to make. So as you can see, it does not help to try hard in making friends with guys, its mostly a futile effort.
So here is the hack.
You actually develop relationships with the women you click with, especially if they have the looks going for them.
If you are on this forum, you should be working on this anyways, you have the best guides out there.
No more one night stands and shoving them out of the bed the next morning. Instead you genuinely try to develop a relationship with them. I do not mean an LTR or anything of the sort, you can if you want, I mean actually being cool with being their friend, FWB or keeping in touch with them. You add them on social media (which is a mandatory these days anyways), befriend their friends, hang out with their crew and keep on expanding from that. The guys you meet through women will also be more receptive since you have a girl as an in.
It might be tough now that you have a full time job but you actually care about some of the girls you are with. You try to get to know them and their crew, genuinely interact with them. Most importantly, you let them add you on social media and other mediums, growing your social life through them. Then through them, you meet more and more people that are cool.
Who knows where eventually get with this!
