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Advisable to develop a degree of Machismo?

LucidityComeBackToMe

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Aug 25, 2013
Messages
40
This is geared for the guys that have traditionally been passive and fit the "nice guy" archetype.

I don't know, I have been watching a lot of Sopranos and Boardwalk Empire lately and it got me thinking of Machismo even though the term is typically associated with Latinos (eh think Scarface then). In any case it seems that guys that have a decent level of machismo seem to never have problems finding women even if the relationship turns dysfunctional. Now I am not saying that one has to become abusive and start whacking people, but I wonder if it would be helpful for beta males, males with low value, and males with high levels of passivity to up their machismo?

One things I have noticed is that even though women tend to be sympathetic when they see someone bullied or find something a guy (with machismo) said as insensitive, they will not hold it up as a deal breaker. A nice guy could be talking to a girl and they could be gelling about some social issue (e.g. welfare, gay rights, women's rights, etc.) and their boyfriend (with machismo) could come by and say "f#ck those fags!" or "women belong in the kitchen and on their knees sucking my d#ck!" The girl may roll her eyes or even scream out in disgust, yet she will eventually be on her knees servicing her man, while the nice guy goes home for some drunken masturbation thinking "why would she be with some ignorant asshole like that instead of a guy like me that shares similar values?"

It seems that females consistently hook up with men that bully others, even if they seem to have gentle hearts themselves. Yes, since I have always been mellow and passive I have been the target of bullying. The funny thing is I read in one of Chase's articles that a good way to deal with someone challenging you is to simply ignore them since you are not rewarding them with a response (anger or challenging them back). I have always done that by default but ended up internalizing a lot of the bullying that was done to me and have that bad habit of re-thinking about the incident even several years after it has passed. I tend to be unhappy a lot since I fall under the past-negative and present-fatalist time orientations.

At this point, instead of directing my rage inwards (depression) I am thinking of letting some out in bursts (directing it outwards). By this I mean breaking balls and making others look bad when I have the opportunity. Limiting my use of smiling especially when something someone said bothers me. I also read something by Chase that in an experiment women were told to rate photos of men and the study found out that they may actually think more highly of the guys that show expressions of anger and disappointment rather than smiling! LOL, so since I seem to smile way too much even when it is inappropriate, I am going to focus on looking stern and somewhat dangerous.
 
a good date brings a smile to your lips... and hers

The Byronic Man

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Aug 28, 2013
Messages
209
Hey Lucidity,

I think the ultimate goal is have the best qualities of a nice guy and the best qualities of an asshole. That hybrid is rare, and I think is the type of man that Chase and company espouse.

How to achieve that goal is debatable, but I think Chase recommends being an asshole for a while so you know how much is too much. In old school PUA, that is the process of developing calibration. Testing both ends of a spectrum so you know what the middle ground is. I don't know if that is actually the only way to do it, let alone the best way, but I do think it works. I wouldn't be surprised if there is a better method of finding that middle ground without testing both ends of a spectrum.
 
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