After first sex with social circle girl

[Leopard]

Met this girl social circle 2 weeks ago (although had my eye on her for a long time). Got her number out of that group setting and set up to meet her for drinks the following weekend. Went well, good logistics, ended up back at my place and escalated but met resistance before sex...didn't feel right to push too much and result was she stayed the night in my bed but no close...I might have slotted myself into boyfriend category by this point or maybe social circle was reason for resistance...

Anyway, she started texting me each day after this but I kept the texting to a minimum like this site says and just used for some connection building. Now this past weekend I took a buddy of mine and met her at a concert with her female friends I'd never met before. Wasn't sure how to handle this exactly because I wanted to make sure I flirted to stay out of friend zone but knew I probably couldn't get away with much in front of her friends...The flirting I did do she was receptive to but I likely pushed myself further toward boyfriend category with hand holding, arm around her and other "cutesy" type affection...

Regardless, next day I set up to meet for drinks again close by and ended up back at my place again. Was able to close this time and she stayed the night again, no morning after sex as she got up early and had to leave.
Now this is where things are a bit unusual and hence, where my question comes in...I follow up with a warm text a few hours later to let her know I had fun and hopefully settle any possibly regret...she's been hit with some either really bad food poisoning or stomach virus and has been throwing up all day...we go back and forth with a few texts then I check on her few hours later...she's in the hospital...basically feeling really horrible for two days now....so my question is, how do I handle this??? How caring and affectionate am I supposed to be?? Normally I wouldn't change much from how I was pre-sex except be probably a bit warmer, (I had her investing more up to this point). But I don't want to be an a-hole and not check in on her right? How often?? She's home now but sounds like this is going to last a few more days at least doctors said so how do I manage this unique situation until it settles back down?? For what its worth I think we've hit it off really well and I want to keep seeing her as she has good long term girlfriend potential for sure. Any advice is much appreciated, thanks

 

[ProblemSolving]

Hi Leopard,

Is this the same Leopard from GLL? Welcome to GC.

I understand that this whole food poisoning situation is somewhat unique, but in my opinion it doesn't change anything. You've had sex with this girl (you've won), don't start chasing her now. You found out she is back at home recovering (you showed you cared about her well-being), so there's no need to keep checking in on her. That kind of thinking is just scarcity creeping into your head. You are FAR more likely to scare a girl off with too much contact than with not enough contact. Let her be the one to check in on you and reward her when she does. This is what causes girls to chase and become obsessed with you.

 

[Leopard]

Thanks for the reply ProblemSolving! Glad I asked because I probably would have kept checking in. I'll just wait for her to reach back out and reward at that time like you said. You are right about scarcity creeping in. I think it may stemming from confusion based on how the sex ended...(I probably should have mentioned in first post) but I lasted quite a long time and didn't get to finish because she basically gave out on me in an expression of exhaustion it seemed like...she said something to the effect of "her vagina couldn't take anymore" sort of smiling/laughing...then said "that was a first"...

I guess lasting long is of course better than not lasting at all but sort of has me confused if it was a good experience for her since I didn't get to finish...this actually happened one other time a couple years ago with a different girl and she took it more like "what? am I not hot enough for you??"....hope that isn't the way this girl took it... I told this one something like "I was just lasting for you" in a confident tone. Anyway the little bit of uncertainty of how she feels about that sexual experience has made me less secure than I normally would be and I was probably about to start making mistakes because of it.

Nope, must be a different Leopard on GLL!