After the first hook up, do you lose interest?

West_Indian_Archie

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I don't. Assuming that we're compatible on that level, and there weren't any health/hygiene/mechanical issues, I want to continue to hook up.

But

I've always wondered about what's going on with guys that get "the goal" and then lose interest.

Assuming she's clean, she's not clingy, she's not doing anything particularly negative - why do you lose interest?

WIA
 

DoWhatWorks

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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I'm like you but have a wing who loses interest very easily.

It's thrill of the hunt vs sex for pleasure guys - Caleb jones summarised it best here
 

topcat

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It’s a mix with me. If I’m going to lose interest it’s usually after the third hookup.

By that point I’ve seen what I need to from her sexually and got an idea of her personality. If she’s more of a dynamic character sexually and personably, and is intellectually stimulating, I’ll keep her on. If not I just get turned off and feel as though I could be spending my time more wisely..

If she’s clearly neurotic, or seeking too much comfort she won’t make it past the first.
 

DonGately

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Depends on how hot, how fun in general, and how good she is in bed. Agree with the above that it's usually after 3-4x I lose interest if they don't have at least two of the 3 above. If she's a little bitchy but is a 9+ and will do literally anything to please me in bed? I'll keep her around for a few more months. If she's an 7.5-8 but not good in bed and not fun/funny? Next, life's too short.

Really for me it's a question of effort. Some hot girls are usually available with sufficient notice once you've started banging them. If they are too hard to actually meet up with, I'll just forget about them until they contact me again.
 

West_Indian_Archie

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I'm like you but have a wing who loses interest very easily.

It's thrill of the hunt vs sex for pleasure guys - Caleb jones summarised it best here

I've heard TOTH vs POS argument before, just not related to this slant of the topic. Usually the framework for that debate is more about "what keeps you going" long after you've gotten skilled as opposed to what makes you drop a girl instantly after the bang.
 

PalmaSailor

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I don't. Assuming that we're compatible on that level, and there weren't any health/hygiene/mechanical issues, I want to continue to hook up.

But

I've always wondered about what's going on with guys that get "the goal" and then lose interest.

Assuming she's clean, she's not clingy, she's not doing anything particularly negative - why do you lose interest?

WIA
Archie

I think it’s a buffer. I think those guys flunk it in the act, they might get the goal, but they blow it with the girl. They’ve got her by the script, but the girl realises she’s been gamed or otherwise doesn’t want a repeat.

I think these guys say they lose interest bc they can’t get the woman again for round 2 and don’t want to admit it.
 

Beck Bass

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thrill of the hunt vs sex for pleasure guys
I have a lot of that thrill of the hunt but I try to keep the girls I like as well...
Of course comitting to an LMR is almost always out of question, but I tend to get a bit sad if I only sleep once with a girl (unless I really don't like her, but it's rare I find a girl like this and still sleep with her, I guess I'm good at screening these days).
 

Beck Bass

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Archie

I think it’s a buffer. I think those guys flunk it in the act, they might get the goal, but they blow it with the girl. They’ve got her by the script, but the girl realises she’s been gamed or otherwise doesn’t want a repeat.

I think these guys say they lose interest bc they can’t get the woman again for round 2 and don’t want to admit it.
I can totally see that happening, I get disappointed sometimes with girls not going down with me again (maybe because they want something serious and I'm not giving to them, maybe for some other reason), but I'm proud enough of my honesty that I would never be that "deillusional bitter" on pourpose, so I think guys that are a bit weak would totally say "they didn't even want it".
 

PalmaSailor

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I can totally see that happening, I get disappointed sometimes with girls not going down with me again (maybe because they want something serious and I'm not giving to them, maybe for some other reason), but I'm proud enough of my honesty that I would never be that "deillusional bitter" on pourpose, so I think guys that are a bit weak would totally say "they didn't even want it".
If you’re getting her once then it should be good and on the cards going forward.

your sub comms are giving something off like lack of confidence / leadership in bed.

it will probably be down to lack of dominance, and I don’t mean spanking etc.. at this stage, I just mean an understanding of how they work, owning he interaction, and basically owning her.

you need to have the confidence for her to submit, and she needs to submit to escape the outside world and let go in your bed.

achieve that ^^ and she’ll want to come back
 

Beck Bass

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your sub comms are giving something off like lack of confidence / leadership in bed.

achieve that ^^ and she’ll want to come back
I totally disagree, some beautiful girls have really high self steem and might go for a roll on the hay with you for a rebound or someday she's just super horny, but once she's back to her senses she might demand something more serious...
Maybe that's more of a personal problem for me, as I have a big fuckboy/lover image and I really have no qualms telling girls I don't want anything serious (though I won't be telling girls just for the hell of it like some lame display of value), but most girls just won't keep coming back for cock when they can get that easily with other guys as high value as you (or almost) AND that will give them LTRs. It really depends on what the girl wants and how high her self steem is.

Of course giving bad dick and being a little bitch will make girls runaway, but I don't think you can tell me what I'm like in bed by reading my comment lmao

Peace
 

PalmaSailor

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I totally disagree, some beautiful girls have really high self steem and might go for a roll on the hay with you for a rebound or someday she's just super horny, but once she's back to her senses she might demand something more serious...
Maybe that's more of a personal problem for me, as I have a big fuckboy/lover image and I really have no qualms telling girls I don't want anything serious (though I won't be telling girls just for the hell of it like some lame display of value), but most girls just won't keep coming back for cock when they can get that easily with other guys as high value as you (or almost) AND that will give them LTRs. It really depends on what the girl wants and how high her self steem is.

Of course giving bad dick and being a little bitch will make girls runaway, but I don't think you can tell me what I'm like in bed by reading my comment lmao

Peace
I wasn’t trying to do that, but they should be coming back.
and you’re getting mixed up between AF/BB
The “something more serious” thing is societal, if there’s enough desire, they’ll keep banging you and go home to their boyfriends afterwards.
 

topcat

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Not to derail the thread, but this article may lend some clarity as to the nuances behind retention issues. I’ve had serious problems with it in the past myself. @Beck Bass @PalmaSailor
 

PalmaSailor

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Not to derail the thread, but this article may lend some clarity as to the nuances behind retention issues. I’ve had serious problems with it in the past myself. @Beck Bass @PalmaSailor
Yeah that article boils down to whether she’s boxed you off in her hindbrain as AF (desire) or BB (negotiated). If it’s negotiated - ie she wants a “relationship” then she’s more likely to bail. If it’s raw AF desire then she’ll keep coming back.
 
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