Another date ended in cancellation. Wtf guys! Need opinions here..

razir110

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This is almost a follow up to my previous post: viewtopic.php?f=3&t=21498 just want to make a separate discussion

And bang, another off-target!

Met her in the gym, quick 3 min talk, asked her on a date. she was "im busy but maybe next week" so not a good start, but I still got her number and texted her after 5-6 days asking how life was, she replied some "blabla" and I asked her out. She only replied next day saying "what about days a or b?" so good one there, I said lets do B, scheduled time and place.

3 hours before the date she cancelled with "I am tired today, let's do it some other time", me "sure no prb, let's talk when we have more energy"

Wtf guys, is my sample too low (not enough approaches) or I am def fucking up in some fundamentals..

Like I do admit that I am not very cocky when I approach, like I could take some chances to be more arrogant. example: the girl above commented something like "this is boring" when I said what my job was, I took it easy and kinda ignored it, but could have said like" so what do you do? oh god, and you say what I DO is boring!?"

Another: she glanced at her watch ones or twice when we were talking, should I go like "if I were you I wouldn't want to end a conversation with a guy like me" or something along these lines, so every time I get a shit test, throw it back at her with arrogance.

What you guys think?

Also, I could deep dive more, but again, I don't want to talk to her for 10 mins, especially in the gym, no time for that and I think breaks the mystery.

Cheers!
 

JacobPalmer

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Sounds like this is mostly fundamentals and non optimal text game. You played off her cancellation well, so you can always reengage and ask her out again in a few days/week.

I took it easy and kinda ignored it, but could have said like" so what do you do? oh god, and you say what I DO is boring!?"

I can see this working BUT only if you play it off super playfully. Honestly when I first read this it sounded really aggressive the way you wrote it. But said with a smile and playful laugh it would be super fun/teasing.

she glanced at her watch ones or twice when we were talking

Not a great sign tbh.

should I go like "if I were you I wouldn't want to end a conversation with a guy like me" or something along these lines, so every time I get a shit test, throw it back at her with arrogance.

I don't think you should say this at all, makes you sound really upset. I would instead focus on how you can spice up your conversation more. She's glancing at her watch because she's either not into you, you haven't made her into you, or she's bored. Increase fundamentals for the first and second point, game is for the second and third point.

As for what you could do....

If she looks at her watch - haha you could honestly just say "That's a cool watch, can I see it?" Then you have some physical contact. Then proceed with "Yeah it really suits you." - This will bait her into asking "why do you say that" or something to that effect. At that point you have to come up with something original suited to her (don't steal these lines) like, "yeah it's sleek and professional, and the colour compliments your eyes." something like that anyway. It's very situational.

Also, I could deep dive more, but again, I don't want to talk to her for 10 mins, especially in the gym, no time for that and I think breaks the mystery.

You absolutely should be pushing your conversations forward as much as possible. If you don't want to talk to her for 10 minutes (or 5 or 8 etc), then don't complain when you don't get results. :) I think the problem moreso is you're not hooking her strong enough, so she's just "meh" about you. She has to be engaged and enraptured in your conversation (that's the goal anyway). So hook stronger, and then deep dive.

Hook/Bait - not sure how you're opening, but afterwards you could ask, as an example, "Yeah I was really curious about something about you, so decided to come say hi." Unless she's really not into you or she's a social retard, she's going to be curious as to what that is. I'll leave it to you to come up with the rest after that. :)
 

razir110

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Quality feedback there, thanks!

About the arrogant lines I proposed, yes always with a smile and playfulness, never with an upset look.

HUmm... about deep dive, yeah will def add more of that, even if I have to stay for longer. I read an article here that talking for long is actually worse.. But will try to keep the conversation for longer.

My opener is a complement pretty much 100% of times, like "Hi I noticed you and I want to tell that I love your hair, my name is X" or something like this.

Now another question, when I open I tend to talk a bout myself for min or two. But then I might not give her the antenna time. So that can be another mistake there.

About the watch glancing, true it's not very good, but it's the gym, I interrupted her workout, so yeah it can be a bit bothering to her that I am stopping her exercise. Or.. it's a shit test?..
 

JacobPalmer

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I read an article here that talking for long is actually worse.. But will try to keep the conversation for longer.

I know the article you're talking about. :) So if you're going to go that route and keep it short, then your interaction has to be AMAZING/GREAT. It should ooze with chemistry. That's partially why I said you're not getting a strong hook/intrigue as the short interaction for you (right now, but will change), isn't working.

Hi I noticed you and I want to tell that I love your hair, my name is X

I think your opener here could use work actually. It comes off as slightly too friendly, but maybe you want it to be more indirect? Personally I'd go with something more like, " Hi I noticed your hair, and wanted to come tell you that it makes you look ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS. I'm JacobPalmer." See how that's basically the same opener, but now it oozes intent.

Picture this, if a girl came up to you with the opener you used, would YOU know what she wants? Conversely, if she came up to you with my opener, you will absolutely know what she wants.

Now another question, when I open I tend to talk a bout myself for min or two. But then I might not give her the antenna time. So that can be another mistake there.

Instead of just yourself, try and mix it up between stuff about you and stuff about her.

Her: something she says
You: relate to that and expound on it
You: something you say and then - "Do you relate to that etc"

That's a simplified exchange btw.

Another and better option is to make it about both of you at the same time. "WE should probably move so WE don't block the floor." "you have such a cute laugh, WE'RE going to get along great." "I like your watch, WE can totally use that to plan the time for our romantic date."

Or.. it's a shit test?..

It's not a shit test. She's just not digging the interaction unfortunately.
 

razir110

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Lovely, thanks for the input.

Now one more doubt that is pretty much irrelevant, bt this has to be asked.. If she isn't digging it, then why the fuck schedule a date to cancel it later? We didn't schedule in person, so she could have easily said "I have no time"

This is one of those things I'll never get abot women I guess
 

JacobPalmer

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razir110 said:
Lovely, thanks for the input.

Now one more doubt that is pretty much irrelevant, bt this has to be asked.. If she isn't digging it, then why the fuck schedule a date to cancel it later? We didn't schedule in person, so she could have easily said "I have no time"

This is one of those things I'll never get abot women I guess

It could be any number of reasons. Maybe she was kindof feeling it but then changed her mind after a few days passed and the emotions faded. Maybe she had a bad day and just didn't feel like going out. Maybe she wanted it to seem like she wasn't rejecting you and was just busy/not feeling great so she can save face.
 
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