Approached by a girl

[Gamms]

Hello,

This actually happened around two weeks ago, and I may be blowing it out of proportion,
but it still feels like a real letdown on my part.

I was on the job in a random office building picking up some materials, waiting for the elevator, when out of nowhere a well dressed, pretty, blue eyed blonde walked up to me and said hi. I did likewise and we got on the elevator. We were going to different floors unfortunately, and she was getting off before me. In the brief ride up, we bantered. She told me she was there for a job interview for a marketing position. I turned to face her, smiled, and asked if she was excited. I think she said she was. But then she arrived at her floor and was gone.

When I was leaving the building, I saw her on the second floor (open balcony). I cricked my neck so hard it hurt and shouted "Good luck!" She thanked me and I left, too nervous and hesitant to do anything further.

I know what you might say, that she was just being friendly. However I think picked up interest on her part, and she had no reason to start talking to a stranger.

I spoke to a friend about it later, expressing my regret, and he told me he thought there wasn't time in our brief encounter for me to have made a move or gotten contact info. Something tells people here will think a little differently haha.

 

[Desperado]

In my opinion you have to go with your gut. What you feel is usually the truth. If you felt she was interested, she probably was. I have tried to train myself to make a move asap (not in a hurried way). The older I get the more I understand how valuable each opportunity is. I rarely regret making a move on a girl, but I have regretted not making a move every time. Life is short, but there is still plenty of opportunity.

 

[Virgin101]

I love these sort of situations, or should i say I hate when I mess them up. The perfect opportunity lands in your lap... and in this case, with no one else there to hear your dialogue.

I'd have gauged her reaction to some sort of hint.

Her: "I'm here for interview"
You: "Oh, well giving that I'm new here, I was already under the impression I'd be seeing you again"
Her: her comment
You: "Gee, is this the last time we'll ever see each other?"
Her: and whatev she does or says here will tell you whether you can go further

 

[Gamms]

Yeah, interesting responses.
Thing is, I didn't want to just follow her off the elevator onto her floor, I felt like that would be weird
and also sort of akin to "chasing". That was the only way to have gone anywhere with it, though, so idk...

 

[Desperado]

I think making a move is better than not making a move, and you can tell her to "wait" and turn her around. Your tonality and body language will speak volumes about whether you are chasing or just figured you should date her. You can do so much with vibe, slow movements and tonality. But, if you chase after her with jerky movements, I think she would assume you are chasing.

Also when a girl likes you, she will be glad you have made a move. Just pull the trigger.

 

[Smurf]

Yup yup.

As you get better, this'll happen more and more to you. As it happens more you'll be more ready to recieve the girl and let her know you like her as well.

Try and as quickly and smoothly as you can figure out what she's doing later. I feel in this situation asking her about her lunch break would possibly be a good option. I'd just try and connect as much as possible, then use a time constraint like, "we're about to get separated, but..." and ask her to grab lunch. It seems like from your post you don't frequent this office building too much, so it wouldn't hurt to hail mary and throw it out there, just to see what happens. And if she came up to you, as long as you're still normal, there's a good chance she'd say yes.

Jake.

 

[ResentMasculinity]

something that happens like 1 in a thousand or 1 in a million

 

[trashKENNUT]

Gamms,

oohhhh try improve your fundamentals. Women smell you from across the street and fucking far

Good stuff man! of course not always we going to win.

Zac

 

[NealIRC]

And looking at all the responses by men, I use this thread as my justification of doing the same to women all the time.

That is, walk up to women, ask them some questions, and when I get my answers, I leave.

 

[lostnumber]

Hello,

This actually happened around two weeks ago, and I may be blowing it out of proportion,
but it still feels like a real letdown on my part.

I was on the job in a random office building picking up some materials, waiting for the elevator, when out of nowhere a well dressed, pretty, blue eyed blonde walked up to me and said hi. I did likewise and we got on the elevator. We were going to different floors unfortunately, and she was getting off before me. In the brief ride up, we bantered. She told me she was there for a job interview for a marketing position. I turned to face her, smiled, and asked if she was excited. I think she said she was. But then she arrived at her floor and was gone.

When I was leaving the building, I saw her on the second floor (open balcony). I cricked my neck so hard it hurt and shouted "Good luck!" She thanked me and I left, too nervous and hesitant to do anything further.

I know what you might say, that she was just being friendly. However I think picked up interest on her part, and she had no reason to start talking to a stranger.

I spoke to a friend about it later, expressing my regret, and he told me he thought there wasn't time in our brief encounter for me to have made a move or gotten contact info. Something tells people here will think a little differently haha.

Its always better to ask then to not ask. Whats the worst that happens? She says no and you never see her again. This is like a dream low-pressure scenario, no one around, no social ramifications to rejection, no pressure whatsoever. So I think the real question is not "Did she like me or not?" but "Why didn't you ask her?"

The answer of course, is that its easier said then done, we get nervous, anxious, don't make moves when we should etc. But yes, you should have asked. I wouldn't beat yourself up over it though

 

[Inbocca]

I would beat yourself up about it actually. I dunno how often you've been in that situation, but the more you don't make a move like that the more that behavior gets cemented into habit. If you remember this incident and every other one like it, and you feel bad every time you remember it, you're making it easier to ask her out the next time.

 

[ResentMasculinity]

I would beat yourself up about it actually. I dunno how often you've been in that situation, but the more you don't make a move like that the more that behavior gets cemented into habit. If you remember this incident and every other one like it, and you feel bad every time you remember it, you're making it easier to ask her out the next time.

ya c'mon almost all girls won't do that, a response I got from somewhere, and I will admit, it filled me with resentment, the response was "it's just not how we work"