Are u Leader, Right hand man or Follower? Here's to all The Right Hand man curse

[trashKENNUT]

Hi Guys,

I often happen to notice that most men are either leaders, as in headbutting with other men and not the definition of leader. or they are right hand man, where they attach to the main guy whether he is cool or not, and don't need much personal intervention, or they are outright followers.

1)LEaders
2)Right hand man
3)Followers

So what is the right hand man curse?

You are the one whom all too often take the bullet for the main man. Not because you are a piece of shit, but rather because of your passionate dedication to the leader, that all too often this comes across as not genuine, fake, opportunistic and an easy target for the enemy of the leader to outright try to take you out. I don't know why i say all this things but given that i have been a genuine right-hand man to some guys, i get a lot of shit thrown because i was passionate and look like i was a 'company guy', which really is just i believe in the idea.

Zac

 

[Drck]

Re: Are u Leader, Right hand man or Follower? Here's to all The Right Hand man c

Zac, True leader learns from others, experiences many things on his own, follows his own ideas and makes his own conclusions. He uses his own mind.

Right hand guy is just a simple follower, a guy who only copies behavior of the leader the best way he can, he doesn't really explore much thus he has not much personal experience. The more he is stuck on ideas of the leader, the more he closes his own ways to explore... A follower may actually be much better off, because he follows different leaders, different guys, different ideas, thus he eventually develops his own style by figuring out what works for him...

It is difficult to be a true "leader" in seduction because there is so many things,styles and experiences one can master. In other words, there is not just one way to accomplish the same thing, many times it depends n situation...

In addition, there are some things that works much better than others. For example, being naturally dominant and masculine guy who can project independence on that particular girl, and who is genuine to himself and to that girl, will get you 100x further than being a weak Beta guy with lots of faky seduction skills. That's just given. At the same time, it would be quite silly to claim that a guy who can describe it is some sort of a leader, because these things were already described countless times in the past 20 years on the Internet, and they were done millions of times by millions of guys in our human history.

We are simply re-inventing wheel over and over, and the guy who can describe it the best is not really the inventor, because the wheel itself has been already spinning here on this planet for 3.5 billions of years...

Hey, listen, we men have to overcome our ego many times. You are not special in any way, I am not special in any way either. Nobody here is, no matter what you read. We are just simple guys, each of us is replaceable, that's a simple truth. Girls go for more dominant and confident guys because it gives them simple security, some protection, and some form of assurance that their offsprings will have the highest chances to survive under the most dominant male leadership..., there is nothing special about it, you can see it anywhere you look.

The simple truth is, that we men became weak and lazy in the past generations. We don't fight, we don't struggle, we don't know how to survive, we don't hunt, we only sit home and browse Internet. That's a real curs of every man here, the society raised generation of pussies in stead of men. Pussies are not dominant, pussies are not confident, pussies are just pussies, and as such are not so desirable to girls...

That's why we are being disrespected many times, that's why any girl can walk away from today's guy with no regret, that's why girls tell you NO any times she wants - she simply knows that you will not do anything about it, she knows that you are a weak pussy unable to deal with anything in life... A weak man can never be attractive man, no matter how hard he tries to fake it, that's a simple and harsh reality. It's not really our fault, it is a fault of our predecessors who made our life too easy...

But this is our world, world of men, the most dangerous predators this Earth has ever seen... So the choice is only yours. Nobody will make the decision for you, no leader can do that, you can only decide for yourself - whether to reclaim your dominance and independence, or whether to remain weak pussy forever...

 

[trashKENNUT]

Re: Are u Leader, Right hand man or Follower? Here's to all The Right Hand man c

Drck,

Er no. True right hand man are women in men's body without self interest. You never really meet them but i have right hand men or some sort of right hand men.

They are not always pure followers.

Can i ask what made you write this post? I can't grasp it. I am talking about the nuances and you are talking about literal direct meaning of the word. It is like a traditional venture capitalist vs a modern venture capitalist.

Quite interesting here.

p.s: Chase's if you see this, an article of a traditional venture capitalist vs a modern venture capitalist mindset, will be great. XD I think it can be applied to dating and how it manages your social circle/people/women/children/volunteer/etc

Zac

 

[Drck]

Re: Are u Leader, Right hand man or Follower? Here's to all The Right Hand man c

Hi Zac,

This World has too many followers. So called Beta males, whatever we chose to call it... That's the problem, especially in this "new age"...

Guys no longer hunt, guys no longer explore... Guys no longer struggle, guys no longer win, they no longer risk anything... Today's guys sit by the computer and jerk off to porn. Today's guys play games, they sit home and do nothing, or read ten thousand articles online... But guy like this, this guy doesn't go out and risk anything because he is afraid of pain, afraid of physical or emotional pain... Today's guys got weak, they got lazy... They are lazy because they have too much comfort, everything is digested and pre-chewed for them, and it is stil not good enough...

It is all Beta crap, todays guys became Beta bitches, weak and useless...

But girls don't like Beta Bitches, girls like manly guys. Girls like guys who can take actions, who can lead, who are dominant, who explore, who take risks, who learn by their own mistakes...

So from this point of view the society is doomed. Today's society goes down to toilet, the glory of great united states is gone... Weak guys can't get girls because girls simply don't like weak guys, no matter how weak guys learn to fake... They simply don't want them... Girls can't get real men because those men no longer exist... Weak guys want to be "equal" to women, they give women all the freedom they request, and they give them more... Weak guys protect women, physically, socially, by law, they protect them everywhere... Those weak guys do so much good for women, but there is one problem - weak guys can't get laid because no women wants them... And if the weak guy gets woman, she will eventually cheat on him...

See the Problem? Fuck weak guys, let them be weak, let them do what everybody else is doing, let them follow the leader... The leader gets laid, but not weak guys, because all they know is to follow...

So that's the dilema of followers and right hands... They only follow, but they will never lead...

To become a strong and desirable guy one must leave the herd of sheep... One must stop to follow others and struggle, risk, make mistakes, then learn from those mistakes, learn on his own... One can't really fake struggle, one must go through it on his own, one must experience the pain of struggle... In stead of siting home and studying ten thousand articles about how to avoid rejections, one must go through several rejections, one simply must do it... That's the way how he is going to become strong, that's the only way...

The funny thing is, that we men, we all have the choice... We can either chose to follow or to lead... To follow is easy, everybody can follow, everybody can step in someone else's footsteps... But to trully lead, that is not so easy, not many can do it, not so many can struggle, not so many can walk their own way...

 

[Chase]

Re: Are u Leader, Right hand man or Follower? Here's to all The Right Hand man c

Zac,

I'll take a slightly different tack and say there's nothing wrong with being the right-hand man so long as you are learning while you do it.

I've spent time as the right-hand man in a lot of different situations. At work, at parties in social circle, with wingmen out meeting girls, you name it. When you're with someone who's significantly more experienced than you are, if you're going to try to be the leader, he's going to boot you out and you'll lose. Probably lose access to the guy as a mentor and role model. I've seen a lot of uppity "I'm the alpha male" types lose access to men who could've shortened their learning curves years by trying to status jockey with men whose levels they weren't on yet.

The advantage is that if you are a good student, eventually you outgrow the right-hand man role and emerge into your own leadership position. Leaders retire, or they go in one direction and you go in another. And then you find yourself with everything you learned from following men who know their roles inside and out, and you were one of the few who were privy to them in action.

Eventually you have your own mission you embark on, and at that point you stop being a right-hand man. But you should still continue to learn. So often what you will do then is build teams of men of different competencies, and learn from the men you've gathered around you or the men in your employ. But before you reach that point where you are driving your own mission forward, it can be worthwhile to serve as a right-hand man, so long as you're getting value in that give-and-take (e.g., you provide value to the leader that he appreciates, and he gives you direct advice/assistance/opportunity either for your trouble or just as a result of you having such close access to him).

The note on venture capitalists is interesting. I'll give it some thought...!

Chase

 

[Chase]

Re: Are u Leader, Right hand man or Follower? Here's to all The Right Hand man c

Slay-

For some reason, I don't have much interest in hanging out with friends. Why is this?

I've had pretty cool guys want to hang out with me, but when I get asked out, I don't really have the incentive to have a good time... Even if I liked the person I still won't feel like hanging.

Sure, I can relate. I will hang out with cool people as a matter of course, just to do it, and because I think it will be good for me. And generally speaking, when I do, I find I get into the conversation and enjoy my time hanging out with the guy(s), assuming I've found cool people to hang with. But in advance, there's not as much motivation to actually set the thing up or go along to it.

I don't know this is a 'problem', per se. More of a dispositional thing. I suspect you're the type who'd be happy to have some project or mission he's working on and just work on that all day? If so, socializing can seem like a distraction. But socialize with the right people, and not only do you build worthwhile relationships, but you'll often learn things you can then use to reinforce / supercharge your project/mission.

But I can't really think of anything else I'd like to do that would put a smile in my face. Even things that I enjoy!

Does this have to do with having a good control over my emotions? I feel sort of detached with my feelings, very dispassionate.

I never really feel genuinely happy nor sad.

Can anyone else relate?

Slay

You could have anhedonia. I have a friend who claims to experience this. I'm not sure if he actually has it though, because he clearly like to shag girls, and I've seen him immerse himself in projects that brought him a lot of joy. I think it's more that he (like me) has a more steady emotional state... Perhaps due to more of a future-focused time orientation where things aren't so much a surprise. Emotions seem to be largely reactions to 'surprises', good or bad. When you're focused on the future, if something pops up right now it's more, "Oh, okay, I should deal with this," than it is, "WHOAAAAA, I can't believe this awesome/terrible thing is happening! Holy hell!!!" which is what the present-oriented person experiences generally.

Most people are more present-oriented than they are future-oriented. I suspect this is why most people talk about wanting to "be happy" or have trouble controlling their emotions. It feels good when they're happy, it doesn't feel good when they aren't, so they want more of the happy feelings. But they're bad about structuring their lives to create more happy feelings, because they aren't so good at planning. So life is a roller coaster where outside forces have a much greater effect on their emotional condition than these have on the conditions of future-oriented persons.

Anyway, pluses and minuses to both present- and future-oriented dispositions. If you're future-oriented, you'll probably find you get more pleasure from talking about your mission with friends or engaging in intellectual conversations where he talks about his mission and you talk about yours. This might be part of what's missing for you in socialization if you want to make this more enjoyable.

Chase

 

[trashKENNUT]

Re: Are u Leader, Right hand man or Follower? Here's to all The Right Hand man c

HELLO eBERYONE,

So anyway, Drck,

This World has too many followers. So called Beta males, whatever we chose to call it... That's the problem, especially in this "new age"...

Don't blame those guys solely.

Guys no longer hunt, guys no longer explore... Guys no longer struggle, guys no longer win, they no longer risk anything... Today's guys sit by the computer and jerk off to porn. Today's guys play games, they sit home and do nothing, or read ten thousand articles online... But guy like this, this guy doesn't go out and risk anything because he is afraid of pain, afraid of physical or emotional pain... Today's guys got weak, they got lazy... They are lazy because they have too much comfort, everything is digested and pre-chewed for them, and it is stil not good enough...

It is all Beta crap, todays guys became Beta bitches, weak and useless...

They don't know any better. Trust me, it's deeper than i thought, for real.

But girls don't like Beta Bitches, girls like manly guys. Girls like guys who can take actions, who can lead, who are dominant, who explore, who take risks, who learn by their own mistakes...

Women expect this kind of men out of a cereal box. Not gonna happened. They deserve part of the resentment that they get, from the world today. They have to take responsibility too for creating such a society too. No two ways about it.

But no worries. Time will heal, as history also shown we have gone thru this somewhat.

So from this point of view the society is doomed. Today's society goes down to toilet, the glory of great united states is gone... Weak guys can't get girls because girls simply don't like weak guys, no matter how weak guys learn to fake... They simply don't want them... Girls can't get real men because those men no longer exist... Weak guys want to be "equal" to women, they give women all the freedom they request, and they give them more... Weak guys protect women, physically, socially, by law, they protect them everywhere... Those weak guys do so much good for women, but there is one problem - weak guys can't get laid because no women wants them... And if the weak guy gets woman, she will eventually cheat on him...

I like to differ. There are some guys who look meek and girly and very funny but are solid boyfriends. Chase noted this, and i am looking into it. It's quite a number.

but i get it.

See the Problem? Fuck weak guys, let them be weak, let them do what everybody else is doing, let them follow the leader... The leader gets laid, but not weak guys, because all they know is to follow...

We all follow, man. Just need to know what it is we follow ultimately, our body that is, which most people are trying to lie but not to me.

So that's the dilema of followers and right hands... They only follow, but they will never lead...

To become a strong and desirable guy one must leave the herd of sheep... One must stop to follow others and struggle, risk, make mistakes, then learn from those mistakes, learn on his own... One can't really fake struggle, one must go through it on his own, one must experience the pain of struggle... In stead of siting home and studying ten thousand articles about how to avoid rejections, one must go through several rejections, one simply must do it... That's the way how he is going to become strong, that's the only way...

I agree.

The funny thing is, that we men, we all have the choice... We can either chose to follow or to lead... To follow is easy, everybody can follow, everybody can step in someone else's footsteps... But to trully lead, that is not so easy, not many can do it, not so many can struggle, not so many can walk their own way...

Err this is a no for me. There's only one thing, End/Purpose of life/Goal. IF you look at a sports team like Real Madrid, there is one dominant figure, Cristiano Ronaldo. But are other players followers? Not really. You can also say Sergio Ramos is the leader at centerback and Gareth Bale is the leader of the right wing.

So how is that? Purpose of life or in this case, the purpose is to win major titles every season. I have to disagree on either lead or follow. Perhaps, law of the jungle, yes.

I've spent time as the right-hand man in a lot of different situations. At work, at parties in social circle, with wingmen out meeting girls, you name it. When you're with someone who's significantly more experienced than you are, if you're going to try to be the leader, he's going to boot you out and you'll lose. Probably lose access to the guy as a mentor and role model. I've seen a lot of uppity "I'm the alpha male" types lose access to men who could've shortened their learning curves years by trying to status jockey with men whose levels they weren't on yet.

Yea exactly. I like to clarify. Sometimes the line is shady. For example. My friendship with you can also be a student mentor thing, which is why i was quite annoyed at some point, Why do Chase always respond long lines, i thought but i didn't note that our friendship started like that.

So that's a misunderstanding, do you think so?

The advantage is that if you are a good student, eventually you outgrow the right-hand man role and emerge into your own leadership position. Leaders retire, or they go in one direction and you go in another. And then you find yourself with everything you learned from following men who know their roles inside and out, and you were one of the few who were privy to them in action.

XD YES EXACTLY.

Eventually you have your own mission you embark on, and at that point you stop being a right-hand man. But you should still continue to learn. So often what you will do then is build teams of men of different competencies, and learn from the men you've gathered around you or the men in your employ. But before you reach that point where you are driving your own mission forward, it can be worthwhile to serve as a right-hand man, so long as you're getting value in that give-and-take (e.g., you provide value to the leader that he appreciates, and he gives you direct advice/assistance/opportunity either for your trouble or just as a result of you having such close access to him).

Why are we on a same thought platform. I need to be the boss, man. *pillow smack* *foosshs*

p.s: But really, this is gold. You are too good!

Zac

 

[trashKENNUT]

Re: Are u Leader, Right hand man or Follower? Here's to all The Right Hand man c

BUMP!

 

[trashKENNUT]

Added notes:

I believe we are heading towards a world where a Lieutenant needs to be Sergeant in another tribe. And a Sergeant must be a Lieutenant in his own tribe. The leader.

A world where we all interplays with tribes.

All men have egos. But you need to know that at the end of the day,

- is the leader somebody you respect?
- is the macro goal something you believe in?

No, from either question means it goes downhill.

z@c+