At the Grocery Store

[Wick]

I'm at my local grocery store a lot, and there are beautiful women a plenty here. And I've since been trying out indirect instead of direct, I think its more appropriate for the location.

Problem is that I end up wasting time waiting for an opportunity (like she's looking at some desserts or something else easy to comment on) and that hasn't been going so well.

Plus I'm starting to get paranoid about doing too many bad approaches at a store I really need in my life. Think I'm being irrational here, but that still effects my state.

Another thing that is hanging over me is this new perspective that I'm having on dating. I want to be a good, uplifting presence in women's lives. I already do a good job of that, but making awkward approaches (not all my approaches are awkward anyway, some are really solid) at a place that a woman wants to feel comfortable at, goes against that goal.

So how do I buy my bananas, when I'm worried about these beautiful melons?

Or in other words, help me with my openers and understanding daygame at a grocery store, because right now the openers are feeling forced and awkward, and way too much in my head.

 

[Rain]

Plus I'm starting to get paranoid about doing too many bad approaches at a store I really need in my life. Think I'm being irrational here, but that still effects my state.

Or in other words, help me with my openers and understanding daygame at a grocery store, because right now the openers are feeling forced and awkward, and way too much in my head.

Hi J,

What are your current openers that you usually use?
You could always limit yourself to one or two approahces, then move to another grocery store at the other part of the mall, or accross the road, or even drive 1hr etc away. Can buy one small thing at each store [that doesn't need refridgeration].

 

[Wick]

You could always limit yourself to one or two approahces, then move to another grocery store at the other part of the mall, or accross the road, or even drive 1hr etc away. Can buy one small thing at each store [that doesn't need refridgeration].

I don't go out to day game specifically, and I'm too busy to do so. Besides, I don't need to because almost every time I'm at the store there are attractive women. Not to mention that I've already done a ton of approaches. I'm just trying to fine tune this type of environment.

What are your current openers that you usually use?

I try to do situational. One that went ok and led to a conversation was just asking if she ever tried a product. Another was commenting thatI've tried what she picked up and it was good.

In the past I went direct, so indirect is still new.

I'm starting to feel the magic of it, but I can't yet see it fully. I imagine there's an element of creativity, spontaneity and bringing the right social vibe to it, because when I touch that, I can talk to anyone at anytime and bring them into that vortex of good vibes ha. That level of awesomeness only happens once in a while, but I'm sure with practice I can do it more regularly.

 

[West_Indian_Archie]

I'm at my local grocery store a lot, and there are beautiful women a plenty here. And I've since been trying out indirect instead of direct, I think its more appropriate for the location.

Problem is that I end up wasting time waiting for an opportunity (like she's looking at some desserts or something else easy to comment on) and that hasn't been going so well.

Plus I'm starting to get paranoid about doing too many bad approaches at a store I really need in my life. Think I'm being irrational here, but that still effects my state.

Another thing that is hanging over me is this new perspective that I'm having on dating. I want to be a good, uplifting presence in women's lives. I already do a good job of that, but making awkward approaches (not all my approaches are awkward anyway, some are really solid) at a place that a woman wants to feel comfortable at, goes against that goal.

So how do I buy my bananas, when I'm worried about these beautiful melons?

Or in other words, help me with my openers and understanding daygame at a grocery store, because right now the openers are feeling forced and awkward, and way too much in my head.

My take on indirect - the PUA is so emotionally interesting and captivating to her specifically, that she wants him to hit on her.

Grocery Stores - Quasi-Social Circle, where the social dynamics can hurt you for a particularly bad approach or too many bad approaches.

One that I've seen work, but would never do - one of my gregarious homies starts putting stuff in the girl's basket, and when he was like, "this is what we're going to cook tonight". High Risk, High Reward.

That's not me at all.

I have two plays

1) The Cool Guy that buys his groceries and talks to everyone and anyone. I ask the fishmonger how he likes his crabs. I'll ask the old woman or mother of 3, how she picks her honeydew melons. Chick in the ice cream aisle, "Is that good".

From there the conversation flows naturally, and you can easily say that she doesn't look like a Mint Chocolate Chip type of girl.

Even if she hasn't seen you be social, others have, and you basically "carry that energy" with you. More succinctly, if you're used to people just commenting here and there, answering your questions, your body language will/tone/pace of speech/ability to pause will show that of expectation, not of "i'm trying this thing, I hope it works"

As a part of your general social skills building - you should be doing this anyway. Small talk leads to big talk.

2) The Secret Assassin who says something that's both ambiguous and provocative.

So the same line, "she doesn't look like a Mint Chocolate Chip type of girl" + some type of facial expression (Sheepish grin, sly smile, or pure befuddlement) - is an invitation to flirt or is it? - but whether she becomes indirectly attracted to you will develop over the back and forth. I think the blue pill guys call it "chemistry".

This is pretty much the same play for the Gym or any type of place that you go to a lot, but don't want staff mad at you.

WIA

 

[Toby2030]

Instead of, more or less, opening with a statement about her, I like speaker centered openers to get her attention. https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-hook-girls-pt2-speaker-centered-pre-openers

This is actually a conversation I had yesterday when I got my groceries:

1. Speaker-centered opener:
"It's incredible that everybody look so angry, and are being silent when they are waiting in a queue to pay. The world would be a better place if everybody just were more open and talkative."

bla. bla. bla. about this topic.

2. I transition it from being about our surroundings to being about her with a open loop:
"I just noticed something about you, but I probably shouldn't tell you. We are still just strangers, you'll probably take it wrong" *Playful/sexy smile*

3. Rainbow ruse
"You seem like you have a superficial outgoing side about you that you show to everybody, but deep inside you, you have a very feminine more quiet part about you that you only show to people that you feel safe around and trust." *Self-pointing*

That's true bla. bla. bla.

4. And then you get to know her:
"What would you do if you won the lottery and could do anything you wanted in the world without having no resposiblities?"

 

[Fuck This]

Just get comfortable talking to strangers. Make eye contact. Smile.

You will see women either light up or duck their head and hurry by you.

What you say is not what is important.

I still remember a cute MILF whose little girl opened me in the supermarket with "I like your boots"

A simple "Hello, how are you?" , "Good Morning" or "good evening "can open the door to a whole conversation...

You can talk about what you each are shopping for. Do you shop for a day or two or do one big weekly shop,

You can even pretend you mistook them for someone you know... That was an unintentional but productive mistake I made one night.

 

[Rain]

I try to do situational. One that went ok and led to a conversation was just asking if she ever tried a product. Another was commenting thatI've tried what she picked up and it was good.

In the past I went direct, so indirect is still new.

I'm starting to feel the magic of it, but I can't yet see it fully. I imagine there's an element of creativity, spontaneity and bringing the right social vibe to it, because when I touch that, I can talk to anyone at anytime and bring them into that vortex of good vibes ha. That level of awesomeness only happens once in a while, but I'm sure with practice I can do it more regularly.

Is that getting into state you mean? Well anyway, do you click your fingers and you're instate, or do you do a few , specific warmup first to get into that zone you talk about?

I may need more data, but I notice that maybe, if I get good 'interaction' that helps get into state, but a bad interaction can prevent me getting into state. A bad interaction may hurt less once in state, because you have the previous good ones maybe. But yeah just wondered what your process was if you had one for getting into state, or if you don't need one?