This is a bit of an intermezzo.
If I don’t watch porn for nine days, my luck increases but my behavior becomes unpredictable.
I probably fell off the wagon basically the very beginning of this year.
My mom is very high anxiety and punishes unpredictable behavior so I am stuck in this loop of “self-regulating with porn,” although it’s not really self-regulating because in a vacuum I would be content with unpredictable behavior.
Moving out will put me in something more like a vacuum even if a perfect move-out situation is not available to us.