been going out solo

[mindful]

What's up guys.

I do pretty well with online dating apps but I never seem to meet girls that I'm super into off there. I've also gotten even more selective with girls from apps because I'm getting even more selfish with my time and don't wanna meet up for drinks and do the whole song and dance with a girl I'm not super horny for even for a potential lay. I also dismiss girls online if they flake on me once, my tolerance is super low these days. They usually ask to reschedule then I send a positive response and delete their number lol.

Anyways, after a while I really start to crave going out and meeting girls regularly. Now, I am not nervous to talk to and open girls, but it's more that I don't have a fallback when I'm not talking to a girl or a set doesn't go well that I feel weird about. So this makes me hesitant to talk to women sometimes. Anyone have any advice? I went out last night solo to a few different bars. First bar I had a brief encounter but didn't really open any girls. Second bar I felt way more comfortable at an talked to these 2 girls that were together but not much besides that.

There was one instance where this really cute girl was with her friend and another guy. The two seemed to be a couple and I wanted to open the girl that was third wheelin' it but I pussed out.

I have a date this evening but going to try and do better next weekend. I'm not used to going out much but will need to step it up. I also have a few fuck buddies but that doesn't seem to be helping my mindset when out.

 

[Alcman]

I feel you. The only two pieces of advice which have worked for me are:
1) get used to night game having quite a lot of standing around; sometimes you just have to persist and hang at the bar until new girls get there. My lay last weekend came from standing by the bar for hours, occasionally chatting with the folks who came to buy drinks, be they male or female. Sometimes I opened, sometimes I was lost in thought and they opened me.
2) If you feel lost after a rejection or have no girls to talk to, either talk to some guys or switch location and take a deep breath.

 

[mindful]

Thanks for the response.

Yeah that’s what I do too, stand at the bar and talk to people as they come and go from the bar. Definitely feels passive but at some bars this works quite well. Plus I think girls are more receptive since they are getting their drinks... especially if you let them squeeze in to order their drinks.