Being a Man That Follows GirlsChase in Society

[Smurf]

I was thinking last night. Mostly about my friends, and why they insist on being in long term relationships at such a young age, or even in relationships at all. Is it because the media has spoon-fed us this idea of long relationships? Is it parental teaching? Maybe it's the social standards that we live around. All my friends are from around 17-21, and most of them have been in relationships for six months or more, except for me. At this point, with all my raging hormones, how could I possibly tie myself down to one person?

There's also this feeling that I might be the bad guy if I think a different way. In a world (high school) where many FWB relationships aren't seen, it's hard for me to retain my GirlsChase mindset and remain respectable.

Sort of a rant but I just need a way or a set of ways to justify my way of thinking. Also a way to explain my actions in a socially acceptable way.

Jake.

 

[Pato]

Jake,

I'm still too much of a beginner for a lot of this multiple relationship stuff to apply to me, but I'm having the same exact problem. The other night I was with some friends, and somehow we got talking about relationships and stuff like that. Is was basically me against all of them in the argument. All of them were saying that you need to wait to have sex with a girl, it has to be meaningful, you should be a "nice guy", and just things like that. They also kind of labeled girls who just hookup with guys as sluts and guys as dicks or players if they didn't give her a relationship and only wanted the sex. Whereas I made it clear that I think casual sex is okay, and sex does NOT have to be some super meaningful thing that is built up to for a year and will only special because you actually love your partner (which is basically what my friends said that it should be). The funniest thing I heard was that less than 20% of girls can ever orgasm, and that having sex quickly and giving her orgasms is not something you can count on because it's too hard, so you have to wait to make it special.

I'm pretty sure this is just how they've been raised and what society has told them over the years. I'm not sure if parents have anything to do with it, because before GC, you might actually hear me saying the same things as my friends, even though we've all had different parents. But most parents do tell their kids that you should wait for sex and wait to find someone you really love, so maybe they do have a bigger impact than I thought. I really think it is how society has conditioned us to think, and how people who don't follow the mass and rest of society are wrong. I believe society has trained us to be followers instead of leaders, and how you must do the same things as everyone else. Don't feel bad about thinking a different way, some people you just cannot argue with, no matter how right you are. I think if people aren't understanding to your actions and lifestyle, you just need to be discrete about your relationships (which you always should be) and not bother wasting time trying to justify or explain it to them. If you enjoy your lifestyle and how you live, and it's not hurting anyone (actually giving a lot of girls great times and extreme pleasure), who the hell has the right to tell you that you're wrong? People need to learn to think for themselves, not just what society has told them to think, and most of us here at GC do exactly that.

Maybe I rambled on a bit, but this is how I feel about this subject.
-Pato

 

[Smurf]

That's exactly how I feel. Society is overwhelming sometimes and I start to think how I used to before I encountered this site. Then I remember what my goals are and eventually ignore it, but it's strong.

Jake.

 

[Drck]

Perfect questions, keep asking guys and keep looking, there are different blogs and forums. You might be quite young (both of you guys), and you might need some life experiences (not just how to get girl to the bed), but your questions are definitely valid. I only wish I found blog(s) like this at my early 20's.

GirlsChase is an excellent source of knowledge and information, if not the best, but one day you'll get behind the point "how to get her to bed easily and effortlessly". The roots are in society, how we are raised and treated, how we are expected to behave. You might find yourself asking questions why is society so screwed up. Why are so many guys such pussies, why are they volunteering to be such BETAs and keep their BETA-ism no matter what. Why do we/they keep putting women on pedestals and so on.

Why adult men, regular and honest nice guys like you and I are getting divorced, screwed over by woman they love, and only pay, pay and pay. Pay before marriage, pay during marriage, and keep paying after marriage. If you don't pay you'll get punished by "system". This is not "being bitter", this is a cruel reality of many men.

You might begin to question your own morals, that is why are you fucking women that "belong" to some other guy, who is not in any measure worse or better than you, who is the same like you. Can you respect that, can you respect yourself? You might be questioning validity of marriage itself, and perhaps even touch questions about religion.

You might unfortunately find being yourself with your opinions and views, against many. You know that you are right, but you can't expect others to understand. You might be waiting for some great leader, just to realize that there are really no true leaders. You will see that many pussy-men are occupying positions that belong only to great true leaders. You might have some friends here and there with similar views, but sadly, you are on your own. And you might create very easily many enemies, just by slightly changing your attitude towards what society expect from you. You might get pissed and bitter, become cynical or victim, or simply you'll stop to care.

I don't know the answers, and I doubt that any single man does. There are no gurus, you will see that things you read on GirlsChase were also written by other guys, at different times on different blogs, and in other words. Learn but avoid gurus, avoid leaders, avoid being a follower...

 

[Just_Dave]

Options and Abundance Mentality

Hey Jake,

Options: Guys will hold on to a particular girl for so long because they don't have options
In their life women may be a scarce resource. Depending on the size and the looks of the girl, the guy may be dating one of the "best" looking girls their. In college, a guy has invested so much time and effort into a particular girl, he's scared of being single. If a guy hasn't spent time retaining his options in a relationship, he's going to go back to square one when it's over. Therefore, he doesn't want to go through the risk of not being able to find anyone better.

Perspectives: Some guys ain't about that life!
Some guys view dating multiple girls at man-whorish, and they don't want to be labeled a pig. I've always been careful about relationships and discovered girlschase when I was still 18. Until a guy has an epiphany for himself, he's not going to want to change. Another thing is some guys aren't comfortable thinking for themselves and rely on what other people tell them to do. They probably never learned to question their environment and be a leader.

Leader: Standing on Your Own/Being your own man
A real man doesn't look for acceptance from other people, rather he does what he wants to do simply cause he doesn't care what you have to say. A lot of guys look for women to "complete" them and make them whole, rather than extensions for their existing life. A real man may be crushed when he has to let a woman go, but he's not going to let her get in the way of his life's goals. A real man doesn't let people hold him back. If truth a real man shouldn't have to explain himself to people or justify his actions.

Take care,

Just Dave

 

[trashKENNUT]

Jake D.

Watch from 0:42 to 1:36

"You need to separate yourself from the pack". http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nif5DTHRnZo (Donald Trump's Words Of Wisdom)

Zac

 

[TheWiseFool]

https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-b ... and-pursue

 

[Butch]

Drexelscott nailed it.
Don't be society's puppet trust me, you don't need a long term relationship, you don't need a wife you don't need to be someone's appliance. I went through that path, the so called american dream. It's all bullshit, since my divorce I have never been happier! Worry about what makes you happy, what makes me happy is sex and making money(and guns, hot traveling, hunting, hot females, and cars and hot females)! If your friends give you shit, just show off one of your good looking lovers and they will be jealous asking "how, when, where did you meet her" they will be jealous stuck with their mediocre gf wondering how you pulled it off. It's hard work, it's an everyday struggle but when you break out of society's norms, you will be disgusted when you see a pussy whooped, weak man

Just remember what chase teaches women are silly,

 

[Marty]

Drexel:

I have read with interest and, I think, understood your analysis.

I have a couple questions. The first is less important, the second more so.

(1) You say that our society is gynocentric. Was it always this way? If not, when did it start? Perhaps in the Second World War when women were heavily deployed in factories and thereafter entered the workforce in large numbers for the first time? Or was it much, much earlier that this happened?

(2) In numerous places on the Girls Chase site, it is emphasized that subservience in men is a very unattractive quality to women. If what you write is true, why would women want to promote unattractive behavior in men by turning them into "useful appliances", as you put it? Attempting to empathize, I cannot imagine that I would wish for women to neglect their diet, physical activity, beauty procedures etc. as this would make them less attractive to me. So why would a woman want men to become tamed and supplicatory if it kills her attraction for them?

Thanks,
Marty

 

[skin_man]

Re: Options and Abundance Mentality

Welcome back Just_Dave!
Great to have you here again after so long. You really left an example. Good to see you're still in touch.

Hey Jake,

Options: Guys will hold on to a particular girl for so long because they don't have options
In their life women may be a scarce resource. Depending on the size and the looks of the girl, the guy may be dating one of the "best" looking girls their. In college, a guy has invested so much time and effort into a particular girl, he's scared of being single. If a guy hasn't spent time retaining his options in a relationship, he's going to go back to square one when it's over. Therefore, he doesn't want to go through the risk of not being able to find anyone better.

Perspectives: Some guys ain't about that life!
Some guys view dating multiple girls at man-whorish, and they don't want to be labeled a pig. I've always been careful about relationships and discovered girlschase when I was still 18. Until a guy has an epiphany for himself, he's not going to want to change. Another thing is some guys aren't comfortable thinking for themselves and rely on what other people tell them to do. They probably never learned to question their environment and be a leader.

Leader: Standing on Your Own/Being your own man
A real man doesn't look for acceptance from other people, rather he does what he wants to do simply cause he doesn't care what you have to say. A lot of guys look for women to "complete" them and make them whole, rather than extensions for their existing life. A real man may be crushed when he has to let a woman go, but he's not going to let her get in the way of his life's goals. A real man doesn't let people hold him back. If truth a real man shouldn't have to explain himself to people or justify his actions.

Take care,

Just Dave

 

[Drck]

The society we live in--The Matrix--is a gynocentric one.

Every day of your life, beginning with your birth and continuing through school and beyond, you have been conditioned to serve the female agenda. By all women and many men. By your mother. Your sisters. Your female friends. Your teachers (who were mostly female). TV. Movies. Books. .... The female agenda, to vastly oversimplify it, is to turn men into their useful appliances. Husbands, who are nothing but accessories at expensive attention-parties for women. "Monogamous" boyfriends, the attaining of which is simply a way to compete with other females and validate their own skills at catching a male. Of course, they are rarely monogamous to these men, but the men have no idea. .... There's a reason for that: it's a way to brainwash you into believing that "being monogamously in love and being a good boyfriend/husband" somehow serves you.
Breaking free is extremely painful, by design. They don't WANT men to leave the chains which bind them so completely, so the system is designed to inflict maximal pain upon you at the mere thought of leaving. It's how they keep you stuck inside...because it works!

Great readings, couldn't agree more!

 

[DavidEdge]

I to feel the same way. A girl "friend zoned" me because I was too "different". I think the best way to deal with it is to keep our mouths shut and lead an awesome life. The funny thing is I use to think like them now I view marriage/long-term relationships deleterious to my overall health. If people know that you don't follow society's rules then they would bug you to follow them and their vapid lives. It's hard choosing this path it's emotionally draining and stressful. But slowly, the world is starting to unwrap and my eyes are noticing details that my old naïve brain never picked up in my parent's home. But the thing about taking this path it builds character, mental strengths, independence, and autonomy. I use to have a serious health anxiety where I was afraid that my heart would stop pumping, I would stop sleeping, and I would start seeing demons again. But now I don't see demons anymore and im not afraid to sleep anymore. My health anxiety is only there a little tiny whiny bit, but it's almost gone completely. GirlsChase benefit me way more than the flawed, unrealistic advice society provides. It's such a big gap: A few years ago I use to do everything like them. I came across GC. BAM everybody is different now even Tv, movies, and online stuff. I guess It is what GC do to men, makes them into superhumans, way more attractive and smarter than the average male.

 

[TheWiseFool]

Just live by example. Your actions will speak for you, not your words. If your a good man who loves to give women great life experiences, do you see yourself as a bad man? If no, then why let someone's words weigh you down so much? However, I do understand the need to voice out your concerns to those who understand. People who you identify with. We all need and want to felt understood and connected. It is in out nature, no matter how much we may try to deny it

 

[Sam]

Greetings gentlemen,

I read this post with great interest, and Drexel's comments caught my eye because in them I saw more or less my own views on women and relationships. Here is the funny thing: unless you read your own views expressed by another person you are not likely to ever question them. In this sense, Drexel gave me the opportunity to see my views from a panoramic point of view and detect their shortcomings.

The general impression I got from his comments is that dating is a zero-sum game; a sort of "women's agenda versus men's agenda" or a sort of "contest for power" between the two sexes. Mind you, I used to run my game with women - and partly still am - on these premises. Either I will get what I want in a specific way, at a specific time frame or I will move to other options. When I saw that my results, while much better compared to those of nice guys, were not what I expected, I discovered GirsChase. This was the only site which went farther than the typical piece of advice "don't be a nice guy". I knew my problem was the exact opposite; I was too inflexible, too edgy, and too disconnected with my feminine side and I was keeping around only the most into-me women, while alienating many others I could also win.

In GirsChase I found a dedication to a more nuanced and balanced approach to women. I found elements like "how to be warmer", "how to be more empathetic", "how to create emotional connections with women", "how not to be bitter" and more.

So, based on all these, don't you think there is a constructive way (i.e. win-win) to deal with women, so as both sexes get what they want? Instead of a "destructive" way (i.e. win-lose) can we not both win? Isn't this exactly the logic of marketing, that in order to sell a product you need to give value first? To get what we want from women should we not give them what they want first? You don't humiliate yourself and of course you still have healthy boundaries and keep your balls; you just take the other person's needs into account as well.

 

[Marty]

Sam, have you read this?

Get Girls Chasing: Give a Little to Get a Lot

 

[Sam]

Yes, Marty, I have.

The questions were rhetorical. I do believe it is possible to find the happy medium as a man. I just commented on the way I thought before I discover GirsChase.