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best way to open at the gym?

MattieR

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Apr 14, 2015
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been going to this new gym for the last 2 months. kinda got this "alpha male" vibe going on (i hate that term); the big guys would even look down as they walk past me. anyways, im 20 and asian going to a pretty much mostly white ppl gym. i get tons of AIs from the decent, cute ones and milfs because of my developed fundamentals including male scent, but im going for the rare knockouts. i approached one yesterday with "are you single" to a knockout giving me slight AIs but it didnt work out. i knew that my fundamentals werent on point cause i could tell that i was SLIGHTLY nervous right as i approached so it didnt go well. im looking for a better, lowkey way to approach at the gym for a guy in my situation. any tips?
 

NarrowJ

Tribal Elder
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Feb 13, 2013
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1,275
Hey MattieR,

I am at the gym five days a week and there are some hot girls in there. The thing is, most of them are not there to get hit on and it's hard to tell which ones ARE. The reason it is harder is because the tell-tale signs of a woman making herself available to all comers are not as prevalent: things like short skirts and revealing tops, or walking sexy and flipping her hair around, etcetera. They're all wearing workout clothes and have their hair up, and are focused on their exercises instead of whipping their ass and hair around left and right.

That being said on the clothing part, most of them will be wearing a bit less clothing, and what they are wearing is usually quite tight-fitting, so often their guards will be up which also makes direct opening a bit less effective than it normally would be.

What I have noticed though is that if a girl at the gym wants you to approach, she'll often make this more obvious to you in other ways such as looking at you multiple times, making eye contact and smiling at you. She knows that she doesn't have the outfit, the hair, the sexy walk and will thus turn things up in other ways to get your attention.

I mostly leave girls alone while at the gym, unless they seem friendly and up for some conversation. Again, the gym is one of those environments where opening indirect just seems to work a bit better. So perhaps try that approach next time. You can always make your intentions known in other, less direct ways or just by asking her out for coffee or a smoothie after a bit of conversation.

Some ways to open would be:

  • If she does something notable, comment on it (maybe she drops a weight or something like that?)
  • Maybe she is absent for a day or two, you could ask her if she was sick or traveling or something
  • When she's done using a piece of equipment, just act like you were going to use it next and begin conversation from there
  • Ask about a fitness (or other) event that she may be interested in
  • Turn the conversation to something outside of the gym/exercising/athletics when you get the chance
  • If you do want to go direct anyway, say something about her hair or her eyes ;)

Check out this article, it explains all of this in quite a bit more detail: Gym Pickup: Dos, Don'ts, and How to Meet Girls at a Gym


J.J.
 

MattieR

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girls say they dont want to be approached at the gym, I believe that is true for the most part because most guys just stare. but i am receiving approach invitations (AIs), so they are definitely open to being approached by certain men. you're saying the best way is indirect direct or opening casually?
 

Rage

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Oct 23, 2013
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Could expand a bit more on J.J.’s approach.

I've only gotten like 20 or so numbers total over the last couple years, and have never pulled a lay from the gym so don’t think I’m super qualified to answer this. But then, I am familiar with the dynamic by this point at least and am a regular a t the gym.

girls say they dont want to be approached at the gym, I believe that is true for the most part because most guys just stare. but i am receiving approach invitations (AIs), so they are definitely open to being approached by certain men. you're saying the best way is indirect direct or opening casually?

Opening indirect tends to work better most times than not at the gym, because to the reasons that J.J. listed but also because it is a social circle environment, and everyone ses you girls and guys, plus the girl you approach may talk about you (if you are creepy) to other girls, and you have to see the girl again likely if you are a regular.



Something that works is having your fundamentals really hard in check first and then being serious about your training. And using peripheral vision noticing which girls are looking at you or not. After that many of them may come into your vicinity or train nearby you.

There is a harmless indirect opener that I like to do, which is ask if they can watch my stuff (when I can tell the girl is attracted to me and has given that sort of an approach invitation). If you get an ok sure that’s fine, if you get a sure and a smile, or that plus a joke or her tease you that’s a green light. Go to the bathroom and then come back and can banter about her and her life and talk and move things forward (like described in the article J.J. links).

Ultimately it is just different variations of indirect openers that work. Follow the rules of the article, then after that indirect just get into a conversation with the girl, if she's attracted move things forward in a way that it is efficient (not wasting too much time talking; you and her both do need to get back to your workouts after all), that move things forward and sets you apart from other guys at the gym.

...

Oh one other thing Id mention as a final aside too is that be able to distinguish the hot girls from the beautiful girls at the gym. Some girls will be there that are there more specifically/primarily for male attention than they are to work out. These girls don’t work out quite as hard and are accentuating their features with low cut tops and belly button piercings and bright colored tight booty shorts and stuff.

https://www.girlschase.com/content/youre ... lest-girls this article applies a lot, and the best qualitied and most actually attractive girls will be dressed just a tad more conservatively than the flashier girls and in addition will likely be more focused into their workout and on going from one thing to the next.

-Gem
 

MattieR

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Apr 14, 2015
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great point, i noticed that the prettiest girls dress more conservative and sometimes wear caps to not get attention. some girls come with full make up/perfume its ridiculous
 

ocantu1987

Space Monkey
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Dec 6, 2012
Messages
401
Great post here. I cold approached a girl on the elyptical indirect before and she was definitely attracted to me. She wasnt a 10, but she did go out with me and I saw her naked lol.

Ive done alot of direct in the gym with no results. so yeah indirect seems to be the way.
 
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