LR  Best Wing in the World

Mondo

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Nov 15, 2019
Messages
31
This is actually from 2014. I'm posting it because I wanted to give an example to another member here on the boards how I handled meeting a girl I hit it off with who I then could not see for a couple months. This can be a tricky situation.

There were several things that helped me out, but I still think the general strategy I used is the effective one in most situations.

Anyway, I was in a band a few years ago. The singer of this band was also an amazing wingman. I affectionately call him the "best wing man in the world". This dude set up blind dates for me several times. God bless this man, they were always cute girls.

This particular night was a special one. We were leaving for our very first tour the next day, and on this night he had set up a double date for us. I'm sure this helped, but we didn't really focus on the topic of the tour during the night.

Anyway the girls pull up with bubble tea. I love bubble tea, so I tease them about not bringing any for us. I later found out my girl only came because her friend offered to buy her the bubble tea if she agreed to come on the blind date.

So we take them to my wing's room/basement to watch a movie. We're chilling and vibing, my girl is a bit quiet, but she is absolutely adorable and feminine. Personal 9 or 10 for me. At one point, my wing takes me upstairs for pep talk, he wants to know why I haven't made a move yet. It's still a sticking point for me honestly, making that very first "move", one that communicates my interest and can be rejected. Pretty sure it's rooted in bad experiences from dating as a teen.

So we come downstairs and I put my arm around her. She's receptive and I'm over my biggest obstacle. We soon mention how crowded the couch is, and Mr. Wing being awesome as always offers us the bed. I look at her, and since I'm past that first move I'm bold again, pick her up and take her to the bed. Mr. Wing takes his girl upstairs and then we start getting down to it. I actually ID'd this girl. She gave me an excited but nervous vibe that seemed inexperienced. Wanted to make sure she was legal before I whipped out lil' Mondo. She was 20.

We did the usual fun stuff, but when we got around to sex, I just couldn't get lil Mondo inside her. And we certainly tried. We were definitely vibing and having fun, but I think it being so fast and a unfamiliar environment made it hard for her to relax completely to get wet enough. So as the night winded down I go her number to stay in touch. They wished us luck and fun on the tour and went home.

So the next day we embarked on the start of the tour. Now I'm smitten with this girl and so I text her a little bit the first few days. It probably was only a few texts because I'm not a big texter. But I really wanted to see this girl when I got back. Thinking on it, I realized the worst thing I could do is text her while on tour. Why would a young man on an adventure like that be texting a girl back home, I should be having enough fun to be too busy to text.

So I focused on the tour and made some memoriez. Yes I did get laid on tour, but only once with a girl I already knew (but it was our first time having sex) who happened to lived in one of the cities we stopped at. Logistics on tour are not good. The tour van is your best friend if you can get your mates to leave you alone.

The tour was about 2 months long. When it got around to the last 2 weeks of tour, I sent her a text seeing how she was doing and letting her know I'd love to see her again when I got home. Again didn't text much beyond that. When I finally got home, I set up a day for her to come over.

She came over and we finally made the magic happen. I went on to date this girl for next few months, seeing eachother every weekend and banging like rabbits. Unfortunately, I royally fucked up because I tried to keep it causal using Black Dragon's open relationship model, except I categorized her as more casual than she was (FB) when she should have been the more serious MLTR. I genuinely liked this girl a lot, but under the FB category you avoid boyfriend type things (also fucked up that anyway!). Valentine Day's came and went without doing anything together for it, and right after she no longer wanted to meet up.

I also think I was the side guy. I briefly saw a picture of a guy on her phone once, which was obvious taken laying in bed. I don't mind at all actually, I'm naturally non-monogamous and wanted the relationship open anyway. But I do think that if I had better communciated and invested a little more in the relationship (and valentine's day) that she would have kept seeing me and maybe upgraded me to main man.

Anyway, the main takeaways I think are:

1.When you can't physically meet up with a girl, let her know you're interested, but live your life without her until you actually can meet up with her. Also, the better the connection and impression you leave off on, the more likely it will be to meet up. Almost having sex before I left for an adventure was a good combo to leave off on. I didn't tarnish that image of cool adventurer by texting her all tour long, as if the adventure wasn't interesting enough.

2. When you like a girl a lot and you think she's worth keeping around, be careful about keeping it too casual. While men are often happy to keep things casual almost indefinitely, women have different needs in a relationship. Franco once mentioned that one of GirlsChase's biggest strengths is the quality of the relationship advice and articles, and I agree. I use SO much of what I've learned here in my relationships. Even if you want an open relationship (which really isn't the same as being "casual"), there's a way to keep her around. I'm currently in an long term open relationship with a girl I met 5 years ago.
 
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