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Can a 1 SECOND hesitation lose you the girl?

TrailBlazer

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I really don’t get this. I met a girl on the dance floor in a club, very hot Latina. She bumped into me a couple of times. So I “stole” her from her group and immediately she danced super close to me. After a while she started grinding on me HEAVILY.

So mid song I said “come” and lead her to a secluded hallway of the club. There I hesitated where to take her to make out - the couch, or pin her against the wall? But I hesitated for like 1 second max!

So I took her to sit down and then told her to come here and tried to kiss her and she said no!! After heavy grinding and our lips touching during the dancing? Crazy.

Again, no idea where I went wrong. Maybe the hesitation, but come on, no one’s game is THAT tight to never ever hesitate.

After a brief convo she just left and went back to the dance floor. Without me, not even looking back.

I came for her one more time like 10 mins later but she was leaving already and said no. So no second chance whatsoever.

I’m certain she wanted to fuck, from the grinding and looks it was obvious. I could have pulled her in like 1 minute. I know this stuff isn’t difficult. It’s nature after all. So I don’t know why I have to go through so many missed chances.

I will learn from this because it hurts like hell, but I didn’t want a lesson, I wanted the girl. I may never be in such situation again. I wonder if this happens to others.
 

Skills

Tribal Elder
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the dynamic on dance floor is different from dynamic off dance floor...

When you take her off dance floor, the state will drop a looooooot, so you have to be chill and game almost from 0 in isolation... vs assume is a done deal due to the dance floor interaction...
 

TrailBlazer

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the dynamic on dance floor is different from dynamic off dance floor...

When you take her off dance floor, the state will drop a looooooot, so you have to be chill and game almost from 0 in isolation... vs assume is a done deal due to the dance floor interaction...

Maybe you mean a different situation, because I’ve pulled girls from the dancefloor a few meters to the wall, and made out with them immediately. There was almost no state drop.

Or took them to the restrooms and again could just resume where I left - didn’t have to go from 0 again.

And in my situation, it was like 5 meters to the hallway, so I believe that if I just had been a bit more intensive, dominant and pinned her against the wall, it would have worked.

I guess it depends on how ready to go the girl is and how far we’re taking her?
 

Skills

Tribal Elder
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Did you read were you said " i took her to sit down" or maybe my English compression classes failed me again... Re read my response
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

TrailBlazer

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Did you read were you said " i took her to sit down" or maybe my English compression classes failed me again... Re read my response

Yeah no you’re right, although the couch was right next to the dance floor, in a hallway (extremely close), I guess sitting down changed the vibe from intense to social. And it was a bit clumsy yes.

But a whole series of events changed just because of this small 0.1 s decision to sit down. Life is brutal in this regard.
 

Skills

Tribal Elder
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Yeah no you’re right, although the couch was right next to the dance floor, in a hallway (extremely close), I guess sitting down changed the vibe from intense to social. And it was a bit clumsy yes.

But a whole series of events changed just because of this small 0.1 s decision to sit down. Life is brutal in this regard.
is not brutal is called a stage change, maybe i will write an updated post on that...
 

TrailBlazer

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is not brutal is called a stage change, maybe i will write an updated post on that...

At the same time when you make out with a girl and push her into your bed or on a couch, it’s not a state change. Like it’s a natural thing.

In this case I believe sitting down was incongruent with how intensely I was dancing, I should have been more intense.

And by brutal I mean that a seemingly small mistake like this has cost me a possibly great night with a girl. Most other areas of life are more forgiving I’d say. But I guess that’s how it is.
 
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