Chasing/insisting after a first no. Is it worth it?

[lux7]

STORY/EXAMPLE
She was blonde, small and cute, just my type.

I noticed she was leaving, so I went out first.

She was with a friend.
I nudge her, she jumps out of fear, I say "did you get scared" she: "how can I help".
I stare at her four a couple of seconds and then say coolly "I wanna see you again".
"sorry, that's not possible, I don't go out". Waves and say ciao and goes. Quite a friendly dismissal actually, the ones that spur me even more to keep pursuing.

My first reaction was to follow her for another "try", which I actually did, at least until another girl I knew stopped me to talk me (cool she told me to bring her back her scarf, but there was nobody to hear that, so stupid of me to allow a girl I'm not going to do anything with to waste my time).


Anyway, the above is just an example.
If I don't really dig the girl I don't mind, but everytime I'm turned down by a girl that I consider "my type" my natural reaction is to keep pursuing.


WHY I KEEP PURSUING
There are 2 reasons why I keep pursuing:
1. I only pursue when the no is not rude or completely annoyed, and in my mind I always believe I do can actually get her even after a first dismissal.
It's a "can do" positive approach in a way , but it's not realistic to believe so strongly you can do after you've actually been turned down.

2.It always feels better when I'm sure I've done everything I could have.
On the other hand, if I feel I haven't tried enough... I always take it way too personally and get angry at myself dwelling on "what ifs... "


IS IT WORTH IT?
In your experience, do you think once you've done a first approach and haven't gotten nowhere is worth to keep trying ?

The investment is not high, if your run after her for a couple of meters or if you stop her once again in the bar when she comes by won't take too long.
The risk is lowering your value at the presence of the bystanders.

I think honestly I overdo it a bit too much, my friends are much more able to "let it go" (but then again, my friends don't really care about the kind of girl they get, so for them one girl easily replaces another).

 

[gifatron]

There's persistence, and there's chasing. Persistence is generally good. Chasing is quite bad.

In many ways, the difference between persistence and chasing is largely effort. If you can stop her in her tracks by telling her to stop or saying her name, that's social dominance and persistence. If you have to physically follow her...that's more along the lines of chasing, and it has to do with the energy you're putting in. If a girl were to immediately walk away, I might try stopping her by calmly using my voice, but I doubt I'd do more (at least at this point in my development/understanding).

Another way I look at it: if the girl is with you because she wants to be with you, but is hesitant to comply with your wishes, and you gently press/guide, that's persistence. If the girl doesn't want to be with you, but you're putting in effort to make it so, that's chasing.

 

[lux7]

There's persistence, and there's chasing. Persistence is generally good. Chasing is quite bad.

In many ways, the difference between persistence and chasing is largely effort. If you can stop her in her tracks by telling her to stop or saying her name, that's social dominance and persistence. If you have to physically follow her...that's more along the lines of chasing, and it has to do with the energy you're putting in. If a girl were to immediately walk away, I might try stopping her by calmly using my voice, but I doubt I'd do more (at least at this point in my development/understanding).

Another way I look at it: if the girl is with you because she wants to be with you, but is hesitant to comply with your wishes, and you gently press/guide, that's persistence. If the girl doesn't want to be with you, but you're putting in effort to make it so, that's chasing.

Very very sensible reply, I like it.

Still somehow it's hard for me to draw a line, my first reaction is always to chase, even if "just to make sure I've done everything" and put my mind at rest.

I wanted to hear about experiences/opinions on actual chasing, on going out there and making it clear you like a person.

I've heard many stories and seen sometimes that it actually can be achieved.
As long as you don't become a stalker or a creepy/scary guy but do it in a nice/friendly/jokingly/charming way it seems to me that it's quite possible to be open about your intentions and openly chase and actually get the girl...