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- Aug 25, 2014
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This is the longest seduction I had in a long while, with lots of game involved, until cool, non chasey persistence finally paid up after four dates and five weeks. It is going to be a little long but I think it's worth it to follow all the challenges I met and eventually overcame.
Initial meet and first date - October 24th
She's a pretty, sexy and classy 26 years old Kenyan girl that I met on Badoo in October. We had been texting the whole week before, but I had been very busy, so we meet only on Monday, October 24th. Unfortunately bars are closed today (mourning the recent demise of a royalty) so my plan for the Kempinski is gone. I take her to the restaurant instead, it’s more formal and less intimate that I expected.
There is no silence, as I manage to keep a conversation going all the time, and I listen to her story. In the meantime, from her body language, I can feel her reservations towards me. I didn’t initiate physical contact in the car when I was driving because I figured it would be easy to do later. While we walked to the restaurant, it was a public place with high social pressure, so no chance to take her hand. And now in the restaurant it’s been nearly one hour since meeting her and still no contact. The physical barrier is growing. I keep my composure as much as I can. Unfortunately it is a noisy environment so I’m obliged to lean in into her several times just to hear what she says. As I can feel her body language is getting more closed (she crosses her arms), I tell her "let’s break this distance" and take her hand out of the blue during the conversation. She smiles. She is now getting a little more open.
Dinner finished, I take her by the hand and inform her that we’re going to my home for a glass of wine. She’s fine and she follows. At home I make her comfortable. I get to take her in my arms and kiss her in the neck. She avoids the kiss on lips. OK she still has these reserves. From our deep diving earlier at restaurant it seems that she has been pretty hurt by her recent relationship and is being more cautious. Fine enough, I will need to have a tighter game, build a better connection before trying again. So for now I decide not to push too hard. I drive her home. My hand on her leg, just above her knee (she’s wearing a dress) as I drive. She is the first one to re-initiate texting, but only the next day early afternoon. We agree on another date Saturday.
Second date - October 29th
About a week after that post, I took her out again, making a big step back into dating. The first venue was dull and had AC problems plus bad service, so we got out and went to another venue. Lots of time lost on this. But the bottom line was that I didn't feel her attraction for me, the way I usually feel it from other girls. So I questioned her why she wanted to see me again. Her answer was "for the same reason as you" - ball back in my camp. I start to feel it's going to be a long road here. I usually follow this good rule: if it doesn't seem to be going anywhere after two dates, just drop it, the time is better spent elsewhere. So for tonight I took her back home and stopped texting her completely after that. If she is interested, she will text me.
Three weeks later
And indeed, after three weeks I have the surprise to see her coming back - I had kept strict radio silence since last date.
After three weeks, it's sort of like starting again from scratch. And this time, guess what, I start to feel more attraction signs from her. The big silence, communicating that I'm not afraid to lose her - was powerful. I take her to the Strata, same place we went on second date. There is a good emotional connection, she gets warmer and closer, mimics my body language, does some incidental touching, and once in a while lets her head linger on my shoulder. We have a nice dinner and a couple of drinks, then at 9pm I close the bill and we leave. I drive her to my apartment.
Afterwards, I really wonder how much time I should spend on her. There seems to be some improvement, but it is really slow, and I can really use the same time on an easier girl. However in the following week, she starts to be chasing me on text. It is time to step up. Next date directly at my place.
Building up anticipation for a dinner home
Thursday 24th, she initiates a text convo. Little blah blah then I prepare the ground work for a dinner at my place. "I’m planning to do a proper cuisine tomorrow, or tonight if I have the courage" then we casually chat about what she likes to cook in her accommodation. I send her a selfie of myself in business attire.
November 29th - the fourth and conclusive date
She comes at 6pm, and initially wants me to meet her outside although I’m seated inside in a coffee shop, but I insist. She finally comes to my coffee shop. She’s stunning with her little blue jacket over her tight yellow sleeveless shirt emphasizing a huge pair of boobs. She also wears heels and a tight white trousers. I feel her a little bitchy, and will need to work on her mood first, and I do that by chatting her a lot with a calm, cool tone while we drive home.
We’re home, she’s still distant, guarded and a little bitchy. When she refuses to come to the kitchen to help me with cooking, I say fine, leave her alone in the living room and go there and start preparing the vegetables. She comes after five minutes "are you angry at me?" "how did you behave, just now?" "it was a joke. Can I do something to help?" "It’s fine I’ll manage myself". She insists so I finally give her a couple of things to do. Incident over. The dish is soon ready for the oven. We move to the living room with a couple glasses of red wine.
Still got a lot of work to do on this mood. I sit at a distance from her, voluntarily, and start to chat. After a little while, I drop "We met four times, and you’re still around me, I’m still around you, so I guess that points to mutual interest. But you are still so guarded around me." She points again at her story with her recent boyfriend, and how relationships are pointless in this country, and that she’s fine without sex and would just do good with friendships. Man you’ve got to recognize bullshit when you see one, LOL. I start telling her my story, and how I moved on from my divorce and start having girlfriends because I couldn’t just let myself go dry heart, bitter and angry. I explain how my previous girlfriends all had to move out of the country after their contracts ended. Moral of the story being that people coming and going, depending essentially on jobs constraints, so it’s better to take things easy. So much for the logical explanation. It was also the appeasing tone of my voice.
Dish still cooking. Things become more relaxed after all this chatting, I ask her to sit close to me then take her in my arms and gently kiss her neck and cheek, and she lets me do. I tell her that I won’t be kissing her mouth, this one will have to be coming from her. She moves back, and says something about friendship again. I also move away. We’re both on opposite sides of the couch, laid back, and our bare feet are touching. Work on it more, then pull her close to me and take her in my arms again. More kisses on the neck. Time to take out the dish and serve dinner.
Escalation
When the dinner is done, it’s time to step up. I take her close to me and start kissing her neck. I go down on her décolleté then up again. Given the past attempts at kissing her, I strictly avoid kissing her lips and tell her that the kiss will have to come from her. I’m on her left side, with my left hand I cup her right boob. It’s huge and heavy. I start massaging it through the clothes, then more kisses in the neck. "Stop doing that!" she says, but I ignore. I move on her right side, then with my right hand I cup her left boob. Same, weighing it then massaging it. Extracting the boob to go further will be difficult because she still has this light jacket on top of her yellow shirt. A whole journey to remove all this. Now she starts to play dead weight again, and lie on the sofa. No more access to boobs, but now there’s this curvy ass right in front of me. I run my hand on it, appreciate the shapes. There’s is no reaction. She pretends she’s sleeping. No one said no so far, so I tell her "OK I’m going to put my hand inside your trousers. If I do anything you don’t like, just tell me and I stop". No reaction. I slip my hand under her trousers, on her ass. Nice round shapes, I massage her ass a little. Go around her body a little, kiss her on the neck. She’s still lying on her belly. "I’m going to remove your trousers". Still, no one said no. I remove her tight trousers. Her magnificent shapey ass right in front of me, in a black panty. "Would you please turn around" (my tone doesn’t sound like a question). She turns around, now lying on her back. Kiss these boobs a little. Then venture a finger on her pussy - through her panty. No one complains about the treatment. I start rubbing her pussy. Manage to extract her boobs and suck her nipples. They become hard. Her breath rhythm changes, she’s getting excited. She seems to be pushing my head down. Alright darling I got you
. I remove her panty and give her head. She wants more. I’m still going from her pussy to her nipples. She starts to moan. I pull her on her feet, out of the couch, and bring her to me bedroom. She’s already bare ass, she drops her jacket, top and bar. I undress, put her on the bed, put on a condom and go for it. It is relatively short, maybe ten minutes, because at this point I’m very excited and can’t hold it much longer. It was very good. We cuddle a little, naked on the bed. 10:20pm, time to get her back home (she wakes up at 5).
Conclusion
There is something to learn from all these African girls I've been dating lately. My success rate is lower with them (7 to bed out of 16 dates with African girls in the past two years) because they expect a much stronger, dominating male. That's the way I feel at least. I have built my skills mainly on Asian girls, and focused on being smooth and sexy, rather than being commanding and dominant. It is a very different game I need to run on African girls. Here, she gave me big barriers, but I overcame them with
Overall very satisfying experience to turn around and conclude after a difficult start. She's a pretty and sexy woman, I'm willing to see her more.
Initial meet and first date - October 24th
She's a pretty, sexy and classy 26 years old Kenyan girl that I met on Badoo in October. We had been texting the whole week before, but I had been very busy, so we meet only on Monday, October 24th. Unfortunately bars are closed today (mourning the recent demise of a royalty) so my plan for the Kempinski is gone. I take her to the restaurant instead, it’s more formal and less intimate that I expected.
There is no silence, as I manage to keep a conversation going all the time, and I listen to her story. In the meantime, from her body language, I can feel her reservations towards me. I didn’t initiate physical contact in the car when I was driving because I figured it would be easy to do later. While we walked to the restaurant, it was a public place with high social pressure, so no chance to take her hand. And now in the restaurant it’s been nearly one hour since meeting her and still no contact. The physical barrier is growing. I keep my composure as much as I can. Unfortunately it is a noisy environment so I’m obliged to lean in into her several times just to hear what she says. As I can feel her body language is getting more closed (she crosses her arms), I tell her "let’s break this distance" and take her hand out of the blue during the conversation. She smiles. She is now getting a little more open.
Dinner finished, I take her by the hand and inform her that we’re going to my home for a glass of wine. She’s fine and she follows. At home I make her comfortable. I get to take her in my arms and kiss her in the neck. She avoids the kiss on lips. OK she still has these reserves. From our deep diving earlier at restaurant it seems that she has been pretty hurt by her recent relationship and is being more cautious. Fine enough, I will need to have a tighter game, build a better connection before trying again. So for now I decide not to push too hard. I drive her home. My hand on her leg, just above her knee (she’s wearing a dress) as I drive. She is the first one to re-initiate texting, but only the next day early afternoon. We agree on another date Saturday.
Second date - October 29th
About a week after that post, I took her out again, making a big step back into dating. The first venue was dull and had AC problems plus bad service, so we got out and went to another venue. Lots of time lost on this. But the bottom line was that I didn't feel her attraction for me, the way I usually feel it from other girls. So I questioned her why she wanted to see me again. Her answer was "for the same reason as you" - ball back in my camp. I start to feel it's going to be a long road here. I usually follow this good rule: if it doesn't seem to be going anywhere after two dates, just drop it, the time is better spent elsewhere. So for tonight I took her back home and stopped texting her completely after that. If she is interested, she will text me.
Three weeks later
And indeed, after three weeks I have the surprise to see her coming back - I had kept strict radio silence since last date.
But did I lose my head and immediately jump into proposing another date? Certainly not! That would be most incongruent. Instead, I text her again the following day:
The third date - November 18th
After three weeks, it's sort of like starting again from scratch. And this time, guess what, I start to feel more attraction signs from her. The big silence, communicating that I'm not afraid to lose her - was powerful. I take her to the Strata, same place we went on second date. There is a good emotional connection, she gets warmer and closer, mimics my body language, does some incidental touching, and once in a while lets her head linger on my shoulder. We have a nice dinner and a couple of drinks, then at 9pm I close the bill and we leave. I drive her to my apartment.
At home she sits on my sofa, almost lying on the side. I have to fight a little to get her in my arms and her head on my shoulder. I start kissing a little but lips are still forbidden apparently. It is a struggle, she plays dead weight, pretending she sleeps on my sofa. I ignore and proceed to caress her body. She has these nice big tits and I caress them and kiss them through the clothes. The clothes are tightly packaged so I give up trying to remove them. I manage to have my hand beneath the shirt, but she’s wearing a body underwear. After a while of this game she becomes impatient and adamant to go. I say alright then. In the car I tell her she started expressing impatience and tell her that I really wonder if she likes me. She says she does, and I add that she can’t escape forever.
She smiles and says something about next time. The tone of all this exchange was relatively relax, slightly humorous, no frustration or nervousness expressed. After that we switch to other topics. I drop her home at 10pm.
Afterwards, I really wonder how much time I should spend on her. There seems to be some improvement, but it is really slow, and I can really use the same time on an easier girl. However in the following week, she starts to be chasing me on text. It is time to step up. Next date directly at my place.
Building up anticipation for a dinner home
Thursday 24th, she initiates a text convo. Little blah blah then I prepare the ground work for a dinner at my place. "I’m planning to do a proper cuisine tomorrow, or tonight if I have the courage" then we casually chat about what she likes to cook in her accommodation. I send her a selfie of myself in business attire.
then I start to tease her about my high quality lips. In the whole convo I did not invite her for dinner yet - just building her anticipation. I ping her a little the next day, just to keep things going, and on 26th, she initiates convo again. We chat, then I send her a picture of my latest dish - that I prepared with another girl that I later fucked, but she doesn’t have to know this part. "It was yummy I guess" "Next time, come and help me with the cooking". "I will". She initiates texting again on the 28th. I confirm with her that she’s off the next day, then tell her "let’s do a dinner tomorrow evening". It is implied (but not said), after all our previous discussions, that the dinner will be in my place. We agree to meet at the city center mall at 5:30 - I’ll come there right out of office and do a couple of groceries at the same time.
November 29th - the fourth and conclusive date
She comes at 6pm, and initially wants me to meet her outside although I’m seated inside in a coffee shop, but I insist. She finally comes to my coffee shop. She’s stunning with her little blue jacket over her tight yellow sleeveless shirt emphasizing a huge pair of boobs. She also wears heels and a tight white trousers. I feel her a little bitchy, and will need to work on her mood first, and I do that by chatting her a lot with a calm, cool tone while we drive home.
We’re home, she’s still distant, guarded and a little bitchy. When she refuses to come to the kitchen to help me with cooking, I say fine, leave her alone in the living room and go there and start preparing the vegetables. She comes after five minutes "are you angry at me?" "how did you behave, just now?" "it was a joke. Can I do something to help?" "It’s fine I’ll manage myself". She insists so I finally give her a couple of things to do. Incident over. The dish is soon ready for the oven. We move to the living room with a couple glasses of red wine.
Still got a lot of work to do on this mood. I sit at a distance from her, voluntarily, and start to chat. After a little while, I drop "We met four times, and you’re still around me, I’m still around you, so I guess that points to mutual interest. But you are still so guarded around me." She points again at her story with her recent boyfriend, and how relationships are pointless in this country, and that she’s fine without sex and would just do good with friendships. Man you’ve got to recognize bullshit when you see one, LOL. I start telling her my story, and how I moved on from my divorce and start having girlfriends because I couldn’t just let myself go dry heart, bitter and angry. I explain how my previous girlfriends all had to move out of the country after their contracts ended. Moral of the story being that people coming and going, depending essentially on jobs constraints, so it’s better to take things easy. So much for the logical explanation. It was also the appeasing tone of my voice.
Dish still cooking. Things become more relaxed after all this chatting, I ask her to sit close to me then take her in my arms and gently kiss her neck and cheek, and she lets me do. I tell her that I won’t be kissing her mouth, this one will have to be coming from her. She moves back, and says something about friendship again. I also move away. We’re both on opposite sides of the couch, laid back, and our bare feet are touching. Work on it more, then pull her close to me and take her in my arms again. More kisses on the neck. Time to take out the dish and serve dinner.
Escalation
When the dinner is done, it’s time to step up. I take her close to me and start kissing her neck. I go down on her décolleté then up again. Given the past attempts at kissing her, I strictly avoid kissing her lips and tell her that the kiss will have to come from her. I’m on her left side, with my left hand I cup her right boob. It’s huge and heavy. I start massaging it through the clothes, then more kisses in the neck. "Stop doing that!" she says, but I ignore. I move on her right side, then with my right hand I cup her left boob. Same, weighing it then massaging it. Extracting the boob to go further will be difficult because she still has this light jacket on top of her yellow shirt. A whole journey to remove all this. Now she starts to play dead weight again, and lie on the sofa. No more access to boobs, but now there’s this curvy ass right in front of me. I run my hand on it, appreciate the shapes. There’s is no reaction. She pretends she’s sleeping. No one said no so far, so I tell her "OK I’m going to put my hand inside your trousers. If I do anything you don’t like, just tell me and I stop". No reaction. I slip my hand under her trousers, on her ass. Nice round shapes, I massage her ass a little. Go around her body a little, kiss her on the neck. She’s still lying on her belly. "I’m going to remove your trousers". Still, no one said no. I remove her tight trousers. Her magnificent shapey ass right in front of me, in a black panty. "Would you please turn around" (my tone doesn’t sound like a question). She turns around, now lying on her back. Kiss these boobs a little. Then venture a finger on her pussy - through her panty. No one complains about the treatment. I start rubbing her pussy. Manage to extract her boobs and suck her nipples. They become hard. Her breath rhythm changes, she’s getting excited. She seems to be pushing my head down. Alright darling I got you
. I remove her panty and give her head. She wants more. I’m still going from her pussy to her nipples. She starts to moan. I pull her on her feet, out of the couch, and bring her to me bedroom. She’s already bare ass, she drops her jacket, top and bar. I undress, put her on the bed, put on a condom and go for it. It is relatively short, maybe ten minutes, because at this point I’m very excited and can’t hold it much longer. It was very good. We cuddle a little, naked on the bed. 10:20pm, time to get her back home (she wakes up at 5).Conclusion
There is something to learn from all these African girls I've been dating lately. My success rate is lower with them (7 to bed out of 16 dates with African girls in the past two years) because they expect a much stronger, dominating male. That's the way I feel at least. I have built my skills mainly on Asian girls, and focused on being smooth and sexy, rather than being commanding and dominant. It is a very different game I need to run on African girls. Here, she gave me big barriers, but I overcame them with
- *non chasey text game
*full use of silences (if she likes me, she'll come back)
*not taking the bullshit at face value
*ignoring her passive resistance and proceeding nevertheless.
Overall very satisfying experience to turn around and conclude after a difficult start. She's a pretty and sexy woman, I'm willing to see her more.
