FR Cold reading eachother

[Hue]

From my last journal post.

After a concert I went to a bar and I snagged this gorgeous girl's number. She had some mix up with her card getting drinks, right next to where I was sitting.

Me: What'd you get me?
Her: I don't know what'd you get me?
Me: That was part of the deal, you had to get me one first
Her: Haha, well you'll probably hate it, it's [drink]
Me: The lime juice is the redeeming quality, I'll let this one pass. What's your name?
Her: Mallorie, yours?
Me: Hueman *shakes hand with a slight linger* (should have just held on)
Her: *smiles*
Me: You go to [school name], Mallorie?
Her: Just finished actually, starting my job soon.
Me: No shit, what a feeling. Doing what?
Her: Are you still in school?
Me: Yea
Her: How much longer do you have?
Me: *pause, smile* Guess.
Her: One more year, right?
Me: On the money (not on the money)
Her: I knew it!
Me: Are you single right now?
Her: Yea, are you?
Me: That I am...
Me: What's the adult version of Mallorie going to be doing? Retirement?
Her: Oh I wish haha. Just some HR job over in [city]
Me: HR, so you're also in Psychology?
Her: Yea! You too?
Me: Yea, I will be for a while.
Me: Don't you love it when people ask you to read their minds, the moment they find out you're Psych? (sarcastically) (framing for cold read & us vs. the world)
Her: Oh my god, the best haha.
Me: Okay, from one Psych to another, you do me, then I do you (innuendo)
Her: [honestly can't remember what she said]
Me: Not perfect, but not totally wrong. Okay, my turn.
Me: I should probably just do some palm reading while I'm at it *grabs hand*
Her: Oh my god stop it hahaha
Me: Yooou're pretty playful, up for a good time.. but only with the right people. Aaaand you can't say no to a good adventure
Her: Yea, that's basically me
Me: See, we're both geniuses
Me: Who're you here with tonight?
Her: A couple friends and family, that's my brother over there.
Me: Oh so he must hate me, the guy talking to his sister right now.
Her: Yea *pushes me* knock it off.
Me: Maybe.. let me get your number
Her: Okay, *gives number*
Me: Alright before I start a bar fight get back to your family. Nice meeting you Mallorie (; *turns*
Her: You too

It was the most natural number grab I've had with a girl this hot before. Looking back, I should have kept going.. the vibe was fucking great.
Especially since she was responding with touch to me grabbing her hand and all that. Also the cold read was totally off the top of my head. I should tweak that to have more sexual innuendo.

Where I turn away just cuts the vibe right off, I guess I just wanted to stop while I was ahead, knowing the risk of her friends/family dragging her away from the situation. I think that probably showed a bit, too.

After my friend started giving me mad props because he hadn't seen me do anything with girls since last summer, and I guess the progress shows.


I texted her after the bars:
"Hey Mallorie, pleasure meeting you tonight -Hueman"
She responded in a pretty funny way, I like this one:
"Hueman. The pleasure was all mine."

I laughed when I saw it, this girl has a good sense of humor. Shame she'll be leaving my city soon. I texted her this morning, "Hey, are you free this week?" and currently awaiting a response.


Keep it one hunna

I was really hoping my 69th post would be a LR

Hueman

 

[Smurf]

Nice man, hope this turns into a lay for you!

Whenever I think of cold reads I think of this fantastic scene: https://youtu.be/l5C7LMOWyYc

Cold reads can be super fun, especially when you get them on the nose.

Good luck!

Jake.

 

[PrettyDecent]

Hueman,

Dude, you rocked this one. Good use of pushing and pulling, and you can feel that you're right on the money with attainability here.

Keep it up.

Nick

 

[Hue]

Thanks dudes.

If and when this turns into a lay, I'll be sure to write about it.
Unfortunately, she didn't respond to my text the next day, but I waited a bit and hit her with another one just a bit ago.

Since it's easy to use my study focuses to set up cold reads, I'll be doing this more.

Nick,

Good use of pushing and pulling, and you can feel that you're right on the money with attainability here.

I see the pushing and pulling, no doubt. I don't 100% understand why the attainability was on the money though.

Was it..

Opener: she's "buying me a drink" - I'm higher attainability

Transition: I'm still in school, she guessed my year - lowers my attainabilty
her good but not great cold read, my compliments didn't pedestal her - levels attainability
"adult version of Mallorie", compliments in my cold read - raises her attainability

Ending: We're both in the same boat, number grab assumes let's talk later - both similar attainability

..and because I ended it I'm still the one guiding the direction?

Hueman

 

[PrettyDecent]

Hueman,

Unfortunately, she didn't respond to my text the next day, but I waited a bit and hit her with another one just a bit ago.

Hmm. Yeah, just wait a little while, she might get back to you. Sometimes you play it really well and they just drop for whatever reason. It happens.

I see the pushing and pulling, no doubt. I don't 100% understand why the attainability was on the money though.

Was it..

Opener: she's "buying me a drink" - I'm higher attainability

Hmm...it's a chase frame, so it shows interest in her, but you're challenging her at the same time. That's what's beautiful about the chase frame, it's subtly challenging. That's why it's a staple on GC.

In terms of your attainability, it actually slightly lowers it (meaning you're painting yourself as harder to get).

Transition: I'm still in school, she guessed my year - lowers my attainabilty

That part of the exchange was great. It's more like a compliance + reward. In terms of attainability, it's that middle sweet spot, because you've made her invest, and then showed her that she's closer on the road to attaining you.

her good but not great cold read, my compliments didn't pedestal her - levels attainability

That part actually was one of the only mistakes in this dialogue.

You're implicitly saying "your investment in me was OK...but not good enough", even though she complied both easily and completely with what you requested. This hurts both value and attainability.

Whenever a girl invests in you with a great answer, you're in that sweet spot of attainability. Give her a good reward. That could mean using a slow smile and nodding and saying "you know...that one thing you said about ABC is totally true about me"

"adult version of Mallorie", compliments in my cold read - raises her attainability

Ah - you know, I thought this area of the dialogue was really cool, but for a different reason. See, you say "are you single?", then you transition out of a topic that has sexual intent by using the word "adult" in the next sentence. So "adult Mallory" makes her sound sexual. It's actually a great sexual frame because of how subtle and calibrated it is.

In terms of attainability, again it doesn't make you more or less attainable, just stays in that sweet spot.

Ending: We're both in the same boat, number grab assumes let's talk later - both similar attainability

Hmm. Usually I'd say talk about the date first before the number, because it'd screen out girls who aren't really interested...but this girl seemed interested in you (based on her flirting and giving you compliance when you requested it). The other reason is because it's an attainability move again - she knows your not fucking around with just chatting over text and not asking her out and wasting her time. It increases your attainability, but you have to do that when you're getting more compliance.

But yeah, like I said, pretty sweet interaction overall! I'm just wondering what the text is that you sent and didn't get a reply.

Nick

 

[Hue]

I clearly had a misconception between value and attainability... I might as well swap out the word value for attainability in that Opener-->Exit display.
Raising value doesn't necessarily lower attainability, and vice versa. Value should be assumed to be high, attainability needs to be raised as a product of this, right?

Whenever a girl invests in you with a great answer, you're in that sweet spot of attainability. Give her a good reward. That could mean using a slow smile and nodding and saying "you know...that one thing you said about ABC is totally true about me"

Word. Recognize investment and reward it.

Ah - you know, I thought this area of the dialogue was really cool, but for a different reason. See, you say "are you single?", then you transition out of a topic that has sexual intent by using the word "adult" in the next sentence. So "adult Mallory" makes her sound sexual. It's actually a great sexual frame because of how subtle and calibrated it is.

Haha. I've been given too much credit. This was unintentional, but surely an idea I'll employ in the future.

But yeah, like I said, pretty sweet interaction overall! I'm just wondering what the text is that you sent and didn't get a reply.

Our texts:
Me: Hey are you free this week? (morning after icebreaker)
Her:
Me: Hey Mallorie, how goes it? Hope you're enjoying not having to go back to classes ;p (4 days later)
Her: Hey Hueman. Just started full-time this week so I haven't been quite the social butterfly I normally am. Hope you'll forgive me.
Me: Perhaps, if you promise to behave.. That sounds like a blast though, you're still in ****** right?
Her: Ohhhh not into bad girls huh ;p
Her: I am. Work near *********.
Me: Please (; you're probably a good two shoes...
Me: You free this Sunday?
Her: Mm you know me so well already...
Her: And depends. Whatcha got?
Me: What we got is margaritas at a little piece of heaven called ****. I actually would be better Saturday afternoon, that work for you? (I work at the place)
Her: Yeah? Where's it at?
Me: Down near **** and ******, where most of the casual bars/restaurants reside (Trying to frame it as a casual date, nothing crazy)

 

[PrettyDecent]

Hueman, two thumbs on that texting.

I clearly had a misconception between value and attainability... I might as well swap out the word value for attainability in that Opener-->Exit display.
Raising value doesn't necessarily lower attainability, and vice versa. Value should be assumed to be high, attainability needs to be raised as a product of this, right?

Exactly.

As your base value goes up, you'll generally need to compensate with raising your attainability. But every girl sees you differently.

Nick