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FU  Colombiana 🇨🇴: Guess I’m really a Rookie after all 🤧

SmooothOperator

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jul 31, 2023
Messages
20
I'm embarrassed about this one. But it’s the only way we learn.😔 Lmk what you would’ve done

In my head I thought I was secretly a Space Monkey but I guess this is a reality check.

So I've been extremely busy with school. I'm unable to set time aside to cold approach so I literally only talk to girls while waiting on the bus.

Fast Forward to my FU. I'm walking with a friend to my job and i see a tall, stunning girl, dressed all black . I walk past her cause i'm late for work. Something tugs at me and I double back and go talk to her.

I open her just asking about where she is going to - some small talk. I find out she's freshman from Colombia (which I guess at 2nd attempt - + reaction ensues ) studying here. Conversation was great were talking about fragrances(she has 50, and is just a freshman) ,anime, fashion, just vibing to a lot of things. At this point I realise i should start some teasing and kino - light pulses on the arm. I also compliment her eye lashes and she does the same. I find out some of her family came with her to help her settle in.

Generally just know that it was a great interaction she's laughing , were all having a good time. I ask for her number and she says she doesn't know it, and shows me her phone is dead. I take her email and ask her for her phone number on there.

She send it to me 30 mins later and I wait to get off work (3hrs later) to text back. Its a Friday night and In my head, a Saturday date is already in the bag



Here are the texts.

Screenshot
https://flic.kr/p/2p3DJ6p
feel like I was trying to do too much in the first message, should I just have said hi ?


Screenshot2
https://flic.kr/p/2p3BJe3


Screenshot 3
https://flic.kr/p/2p3DJ69

Screenshot 4
https://flic.kr/p/2p3EAGY
it all went to shit here. 😭Looking back idk what I was hoping for her to reply to that . I think I was physically fatigued and threw up a Hail Mary in a non Hail Mary situation .

So I give it some time and switch


Screenshot 5
https://flic.kr/p/2p3DJ5Y
I use a voice message for some variety and I’m basically perplexed how she owns 50 perfumes


Screenshot 6
https://www.flickr.com/photos/199165151@N03/53195062198/in/dateposted-public/

The last message is really just a bait message , once she answers I plan to wait one week and send a voice message telling her we should do a video call and talk about each of our collections. (Ik it’s not exactly textbook - but it’s a plausible way to get my foot in the door ) From there get the vibe back up and ask her out




recommendations and tweaks , let me have it
 

Will_V

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
1,929
What I see as the main issue here is that you made a slight mistake in frame implying she was dull, to fix it you dialled up the sexual tension too much, and then when she didn't appear to react positively you retreated into boring, nice topics, leaving her a bit cold and confused. By the time you sent the last message the vibe was on life support.

Immigrant/visa girls especially when they just arrive often have very little money and spare time and are working hard to stabilize their situation (and are not proud about being in that situation), which can make them hard to get into 'fun mode'. And it's easy to trigger their annoyance by implying they are dull/boring which would work as a tease on a girl in a better situation. I find what works best for these girls is to talk about dreams and plans since they usually have a lot of them and not enough people to talk about it to.

So when she said that she was boring I think a better response would have been like 'lol I bet you're a different girl when you've got time to kick back, or were your eyes lying to me ..' or something like that.

When you sent the two texts (two is too much anyway) basically validating her with a sexual vibe, and she replied very neutrally, it was her way of saying 'I'm not sure how to respond to that'. Leaving her hanging just made the whole thing a little awkward, you need to steer it back to the path without unvalidating your sexual interest. Sometimes I do this by abstracting what I said into something with less sexual innuendo - you said 'wildest imaginations' and 'little wolves' which implies a strong imagination and drive, so you could follow up with something like 'yeah I bet you're the kind of girl who really goes after the things she wants in life' and now it's something she can accept which (slightly) implies that she's accepting the sexual frame too.

After leaving her hanging you changed threads and basically stayed in nice boring friend territory until the whole thing flamed out, when you needed to validate what you'd said but in a way she could accept.

About her being difficult about nailing down a time, I think the best way is to minimize the meet and keep things light, and just keep leading and poking for where her spare time is. Like 'ok when do you have a spare half an hour to kick back? Your apartment won't catch fire while you're gone I promise'.

Hope this helps.
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

SmooothOperator

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Jul 31, 2023
Messages
20
What I see as the main issue here is that you made a slight mistake in frame implying she was dull, to fix it you dialled up the sexual tension too much, and then when she didn't appear to react positively you retreated into boring, nice topics, leaving her a bit cold and confused. By the time you sent the last message the vibe was on life support.

Immigrant/visa girls especially when they just arrive often have very little money and spare time and are working hard to stabilize their situation (and are not proud about being in that situation), which can make them hard to get into 'fun mode'. And it's easy to trigger their annoyance by implying they are dull/boring which would work as a tease on a girl in a better situation. I find what works best for these girls is to talk about dreams and plans since they usually have a lot of them and not enough people to talk about it to.

So when she said that she was boring I think a better response would have been like 'lol I bet you're a different girl when you've got time to kick back, or were your eyes lying to me ..' or something like that.

When you sent the two texts (two is too much anyway) basically validating her with a sexual vibe, and she replied very neutrally, it was her way of saying 'I'm not sure how to respond to that'. Leaving her hanging just made the whole thing a little awkward, you need to steer it back to the path without unvalidating your sexual interest. Sometimes I do this by abstracting what I said into something with less sexual innuendo - you said 'wildest imaginations' and 'little wolves' which implies a strong imagination and drive, so you could follow up with something like 'yeah I bet you're the kind of girl who really goes after the things she wants in life' and now it's something she can accept which (slightly) implies that she's accepting the sexual frame too.

After leaving her hanging you changed threads and basically stayed in nice boring friend territory until the whole thing flamed out, when you needed to validate what you'd said but in a way she could accept.

About her being difficult about nailing down a time, I think the best way is to minimize the meet and keep things light, and just keep leading and poking for where her spare time is. Like 'ok when do you have a spare half an hour to kick back? Your apartment won't catch fire while you're gone I promise'.

Hope this helps.
This helps big time
All I had to do was to reframe like you said. It’s too late for that now . Vibe is 100% dead , it’s going to be one of those situations where she maybe texts me back in a week or two or most likely never.

We’re in the same major so the chances are extremely high that we’ll cross paths soon . How do you think I should respond when I see her
 

Skills

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 11, 2019
Messages
4,651
Everything was good till you mentioned tomorrow, so when you said we had to change that was perfect...your technical mistake was saying tomorrow, cause you had no intelligence on her availability... after You went into some type of anti seductive business arrangement chasing schedule...I will link you a post were I discuss this...

 

Will_V

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
1,929
This helps big time
All I had to do was to reframe like you said. It’s too late for that now . Vibe is 100% dead , it’s going to be one of those situations where she maybe texts me back in a week or two or most likely never.

We’re in the same major so the chances are extremely high that we’ll cross paths soon . How do you think I should respond when I see her

@Skills makes a good point about assuming availability.

What I would do? Leave it a couple days, then ping with something refreshing/funny, banter, soft close hard close like Skills always bangs on about :)
 
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