- Joined
- Feb 4, 2016
- Messages
- 32
(Long post, there’s a TL
R at the bottom)
First of all, I'm feeling great 'cuz I finally had a couple of dates with new chicks since that disaster where (due to my own neediness, and against Chase's advice) I accepted an offer from a girl to go on a 1st date to a club. That ended terribly.... (viewtopic.php?f=5&t=15947)
Both these new chicks were 24 (I’m 31).
The 1st girl was meh, boring, nothing special looks-wise, couldn’t pull her home, didn’t care, not-my-type, cut contact….
The 2nd chick I met at what is now officially my favorite pick-up venue, a metal/rock bar (my niche) where I’ve gotten more success than anywhere else (20+ numbers resulting in 3 dates, 1 make-out, 1 lay).
I was walking around the bar, talking to everyone (I play music in local metal scene and know almost everyone in it), and was getting miffed at the lack of girls to approach. It was slim pickings tonight, hardly any girls, and the few there were with their boyfriends. Then I noticed her and her chick friend from behind. She was pretty cute; tall, nice legs, dark blonde-ish, with cool accessories and clothes. I made sure to walk around a little without looking at her so she’d see me first. A few minutes later I said hi and talked to her and her friend briefly. We exchanged names but she was pretty distracted and drifted away. I talked to her briefly 1 or 2 more times and then, as I was getting ready to leave, I noticed her outside the bar surrounded by guy and chick friends. Well, I'll be damned if I leave this bar without pushing hard with at least one girl.
I used to be terrified of trying to pick up girls in front of other people, but I wasn’t even phased that 5-6 people were watching me.
Fearlessly I walked right up to the group and started talking to her. She wasn’t in the mood to talk. When I asked her a few questions she said “I don’t wanna answer any questions right now”. Hahaha. I played around with that (told her “Well you have to, I work for the FBI…etc…”) and teased her a bit while simultaneously deciding to sit right beside her. I said “OK sure, no questions, I’ll just talk in statements”, then proceeded to make some funny statements that were worded in a way that required a response from her like “you seem like you’re having a not so great night….” (I forgot exactly what I said...). Her chick friends could see I was hitting on her and seemed to be enjoying it.
Slowly she was starting to melt, she cracked a few smiles and laughed at a few of my jokes. I got her number on a good note, offered to walk her home that night, she declined. I bid her good night and left.
I sent an icebreaked text THE NEXT MORNING. (While I really love the 1-4 hour rule for sending an icebreaker text when meeting a new girl in daytime [and it has served me great], I’m finding that it doesn’t seem to work so well with girls I meet late at night at bars. (It’s worked only once for me). So I don’t do the 2AM / 3AM icebreaker text anymore.
We texted a bit. I’m finally finding a nice balance between a LITTLE bit of rapport-building through text and then pushing for a date. I think that’s why I’m getting more dates lately. I altered my text game a bit. (Previously I was instantly pushing for a date and it was too soon and scared girls off).
We were kinda sending each other 2-3 texts/day for the next 2 days, and on the 3rd day I again asked what her schedule is like, and it was basically: “tonight might be the only night I’m free until next week”. So I seized the day and suggested we meet right now since I was (coincidentally) close to her neighborhood.
I suggested a bar nearby. She said sure, but said that I should just come to her place first for a couple of beers before we go. (Works for me!!!)
I come to her place, we chat. She invites me to her room and I sit on her bed. (Already I’m thinking like: “fuck the date lets just skip it and get physical right away!”). Haha, but I stayed cool. She packed a bong and we took 2 hoots each. I began touching her ears & neck, admiring her earring. I playfully suggested “maybe we have some fun before we go”, but she smoothly evaded the attempt.
So, we leave and start walking to the bar. Now I’m feeling a little out of my element because the date is just starting and I am fucking BAKED! hahaha. I do toke regularly (cutting down), but normally I won’t even touch it if I’m going to a date or out to meet girls.
The date was great! She was really talkative and interesting. She made it easy because she talked a lot, and I was constantly mentally scanning for branch-off points, then bringing up specific topics she mentioned, carefully choosing the ones I felt were gonna drive the interaction forward and deep dive her better. She drank like a fish! Kept ordering more and more pints of beer, and at one point, when I got back from the washroom, I noticed she’d ordered another 2 pints each, plus shots. Lol! (This is why I love pick-up. Just some of the funny experiences and people you meet… it’s priceless). At this point I suggested we leave and continue drinking somewhere where we won’t both go bankrupt. So we did.
On the way back to her place, we sat and talked on a bench nearby. I was caressing her arm, and she told me “Sorry I don’t put out on the first date”. I acted completely cool as if it didn’t matter at all. It certainly wasn’t gonna change the fact that I’m gonna try as hell to do it anyway.
We went back to her room and smoked more weed. Conversation was great, I was touching her a lot. We started kissing and making out, I started played with her boobs, but she was resisting. So I just tried to do some push-pull technique, 2 steps forward one step back. But I kept getting resistance. I knew I should have kept pushing forward, but her walls were up, and after like 6 pints of beer and 6 bong hits, my persuasion and situation-analyzation skills were far from at their prime. I stopped persisting, thinking “well this chick likes me, so I’ll be respectful of her ‘rule’, I’m sure I’ll fuck her on the 2nd date anyway”.
I went home pretty happy regardless. Next day, I went and looked up Chase’s article on 2nd date strategies. Then I headed over to the article “The Last 5%” in order to make sure to close the deal next time. But that’s when my heart kinda sank, as the wise master Chase recounted all his experiences regarding how low your chances to get intimite with a girl become after a “failed mating attempt”.
Damn… I’m still gonna try my best to get her and I’ll stay totally cool, confident, non-needy. I hope it works. I suggested we chill again but she says she’s busy the next few days (which corresponds to what she told me before our date). Fingers crossed.
As always, lots of lessons learned here. Any advice from the experienced guys on how to proceed is absolutely appreciated.
___________
TLR – Approached a chick who was cold and unresponsive at the bar, but through persistence and humor I got her to warm up and got her number. 1st date we got drunk & baked, then went back to her place where I managed to make out and play with her boobs but couldn’t close the deal. Gonna try for a 2nd date.
R at the bottom)First of all, I'm feeling great 'cuz I finally had a couple of dates with new chicks since that disaster where (due to my own neediness, and against Chase's advice) I accepted an offer from a girl to go on a 1st date to a club. That ended terribly.... (viewtopic.php?f=5&t=15947)
Both these new chicks were 24 (I’m 31).
The 1st girl was meh, boring, nothing special looks-wise, couldn’t pull her home, didn’t care, not-my-type, cut contact….
The 2nd chick I met at what is now officially my favorite pick-up venue, a metal/rock bar (my niche) where I’ve gotten more success than anywhere else (20+ numbers resulting in 3 dates, 1 make-out, 1 lay).
I was walking around the bar, talking to everyone (I play music in local metal scene and know almost everyone in it), and was getting miffed at the lack of girls to approach. It was slim pickings tonight, hardly any girls, and the few there were with their boyfriends. Then I noticed her and her chick friend from behind. She was pretty cute; tall, nice legs, dark blonde-ish, with cool accessories and clothes. I made sure to walk around a little without looking at her so she’d see me first. A few minutes later I said hi and talked to her and her friend briefly. We exchanged names but she was pretty distracted and drifted away. I talked to her briefly 1 or 2 more times and then, as I was getting ready to leave, I noticed her outside the bar surrounded by guy and chick friends. Well, I'll be damned if I leave this bar without pushing hard with at least one girl.
I used to be terrified of trying to pick up girls in front of other people, but I wasn’t even phased that 5-6 people were watching me.
Fearlessly I walked right up to the group and started talking to her. She wasn’t in the mood to talk. When I asked her a few questions she said “I don’t wanna answer any questions right now”. Hahaha. I played around with that (told her “Well you have to, I work for the FBI…etc…”) and teased her a bit while simultaneously deciding to sit right beside her. I said “OK sure, no questions, I’ll just talk in statements”, then proceeded to make some funny statements that were worded in a way that required a response from her like “you seem like you’re having a not so great night….” (I forgot exactly what I said...). Her chick friends could see I was hitting on her and seemed to be enjoying it.
Slowly she was starting to melt, she cracked a few smiles and laughed at a few of my jokes. I got her number on a good note, offered to walk her home that night, she declined. I bid her good night and left.
I sent an icebreaked text THE NEXT MORNING. (While I really love the 1-4 hour rule for sending an icebreaker text when meeting a new girl in daytime [and it has served me great], I’m finding that it doesn’t seem to work so well with girls I meet late at night at bars. (It’s worked only once for me). So I don’t do the 2AM / 3AM icebreaker text anymore.
We texted a bit. I’m finally finding a nice balance between a LITTLE bit of rapport-building through text and then pushing for a date. I think that’s why I’m getting more dates lately. I altered my text game a bit. (Previously I was instantly pushing for a date and it was too soon and scared girls off).
We were kinda sending each other 2-3 texts/day for the next 2 days, and on the 3rd day I again asked what her schedule is like, and it was basically: “tonight might be the only night I’m free until next week”. So I seized the day and suggested we meet right now since I was (coincidentally) close to her neighborhood.
I suggested a bar nearby. She said sure, but said that I should just come to her place first for a couple of beers before we go. (Works for me!!!)
I come to her place, we chat. She invites me to her room and I sit on her bed. (Already I’m thinking like: “fuck the date lets just skip it and get physical right away!”). Haha, but I stayed cool. She packed a bong and we took 2 hoots each. I began touching her ears & neck, admiring her earring. I playfully suggested “maybe we have some fun before we go”, but she smoothly evaded the attempt.
So, we leave and start walking to the bar. Now I’m feeling a little out of my element because the date is just starting and I am fucking BAKED! hahaha. I do toke regularly (cutting down), but normally I won’t even touch it if I’m going to a date or out to meet girls.
The date was great! She was really talkative and interesting. She made it easy because she talked a lot, and I was constantly mentally scanning for branch-off points, then bringing up specific topics she mentioned, carefully choosing the ones I felt were gonna drive the interaction forward and deep dive her better. She drank like a fish! Kept ordering more and more pints of beer, and at one point, when I got back from the washroom, I noticed she’d ordered another 2 pints each, plus shots. Lol! (This is why I love pick-up. Just some of the funny experiences and people you meet… it’s priceless). At this point I suggested we leave and continue drinking somewhere where we won’t both go bankrupt. So we did.
On the way back to her place, we sat and talked on a bench nearby. I was caressing her arm, and she told me “Sorry I don’t put out on the first date”. I acted completely cool as if it didn’t matter at all. It certainly wasn’t gonna change the fact that I’m gonna try as hell to do it anyway.
We went back to her room and smoked more weed. Conversation was great, I was touching her a lot. We started kissing and making out, I started played with her boobs, but she was resisting. So I just tried to do some push-pull technique, 2 steps forward one step back. But I kept getting resistance. I knew I should have kept pushing forward, but her walls were up, and after like 6 pints of beer and 6 bong hits, my persuasion and situation-analyzation skills were far from at their prime. I stopped persisting, thinking “well this chick likes me, so I’ll be respectful of her ‘rule’, I’m sure I’ll fuck her on the 2nd date anyway”.
I went home pretty happy regardless. Next day, I went and looked up Chase’s article on 2nd date strategies. Then I headed over to the article “The Last 5%” in order to make sure to close the deal next time. But that’s when my heart kinda sank, as the wise master Chase recounted all his experiences regarding how low your chances to get intimite with a girl become after a “failed mating attempt”.
Damn… I’m still gonna try my best to get her and I’ll stay totally cool, confident, non-needy. I hope it works. I suggested we chill again but she says she’s busy the next few days (which corresponds to what she told me before our date). Fingers crossed.
As always, lots of lessons learned here. Any advice from the experienced guys on how to proceed is absolutely appreciated.
___________
TL
R – Approached a chick who was cold and unresponsive at the bar, but through persistence and humor I got her to warm up and got her number. 1st date we got drunk & baked, then went back to her place where I managed to make out and play with her boobs but couldn’t close the deal. Gonna try for a 2nd date.
