Dealing w/ a guy with no self respect

[Go10]

Hey fellas!
I got into a relationship with a girl after ages. She's exactly 'my type.' Thanks GC.

Its only been a week but I come to know of this guy that's been bothering her since the last 2 months. Dude managed to get her phone no through one of my girl's friend and her parents no. as well by sneaking it from the school register. Even changed schools and private tuition just for her.

texts her 100 times a day saying he loves her and what not. when she blocks him on whatsapp and her phone, he calls her from a different phone or her parents phone. Then he blackmails her about committing suicide/doing crazy shit. My girl keeps telling him to fuck off but he just doesn't get it. I sent him a text from her phone, rude and mean when i got pissed off, but this guy still won't stop. She told him she never had the slightest of liking towards him and is dating someone else..but still

What do I do here? I don't want to confront this guy just now b/c that'd mean a lot of people knowing about me and the girl, and i read in a post by Chase, that earlier, the less no people know, the better it is. I haven't been able to talk to her about her, her day ,or anything else except how to counter this guy since the last two days.
she said she'd handle it herself and told me to forget about it and didn't want to drag me into it. She doesn't want to involve her parent's as it'd complicate stuff. Please help me out here.

 

[HellAtlantic]

So you aren't gonna do anything about this because you read some article by some guy you never met that says if you're in a relationship the less ppl that know about it the better? Does that make sense to you? So you're gonna let some crazy alpha male intrude on your girl and stand around and do nothing about it like a beta with your cock tucked firmly between your legs? Ouch. Now I know how cults are possible. Look, a lot of what Chase says makes sense but he doesn't have the answer to everything - he has the answer to everything with his own life and has been kind to share his experiences with others. But you have your own life. Don't ever let every word an Internet stranger says influence how to live your life, these are all just tips and hacks to increase your chances of being a better you to hopefully get with the kind of girls you're after but these aren't hard life rules.

 

[Go10]

Ok I get what you mean. thanks. got too much in my head there thinking too much about every little thing.

 

[GeneralFap]

Don't want to scare you, but I've seen too many real FBI stories where an obsessed guy causes harm to person they're infatuated with or the partner of the person. This guy seems pretty looney (maybe he's mentally ill) so you definitely want to do something about it.

 

[HellAtlantic]

Don't want to scare you, but I've seen too many real FBI stories where an obsessed guy causes harm to person they're infatuated with or the partner of the person. This guy seems pretty looney (maybe he's mentally ill) so you definitely want to do something about it.

Right, this is definitely not a case where you want to sit back and do nothing. It makes you look weak, for one, and you can't allow crazy to go unchecked.

 

[Drck]

Send him a text from her phone, saying something like I'm flattered by your attention but I also have to be honest, I don't have the same feelings for you. I love my BF and your behavior makes me really uncomfortable. My friends suggested if don't stop following me around that they will report you to the authorities. I don't really want to do that, but I wish you all the best.

Let your GF talk to her friends about it, make sure some people know about him.

Then call the authorities if he doesn't stop. If he wants to commit suicide, let him commit suicide, you are not a savior.

In the mean time, when you see him just keep looking at him, especially when you are with your GF.

In my old days, I would simply take couple of friends and beat the sh*t out of him, but I guess times changed. It is fast and peaceful, the dude learns fast to respect the pain, and others as well...

 

[Frost]

I was reading a book a while ago called "The Gift of Fear" (I suggest you read it, chapter 8 at least). There is a chapter about this kind of situation. Let's say Guy A is constantly pursuing Girl B trying to get together with her. The main idea was that the worst thing to do is for B to try to let him down easy by not telling him straight up that she's not interested, so she doesn't hurt his feelings. The best thing to do is to tell the guy explicitly that she's not interested in him is very clear way, and then stop replying to his calls, messages and basically stop giving him the attention he craves.

This is a passage from the book.

“That may take some time and some patience, and I know it isn’t easy, but efforts to change his mind or to change him are the opposite of what you want. You don’t want him improved—you want him removed. You want him out of your life. There is a rule we call “engage and enrage.” The more attachment you have— whether favorable or unfavorable—the more this will escalate.
...
The only way you can have your desired outcome right now is to have no contact. Only then will he begin to find other solutions to his problems, which you can’t help with anyway. As long as he gets a response from you, he is distracted from his life. If, however, you don’t return the calls, then each time he leaves a message, he gets a message: that you can resist his pursuit.”

So since your GF already told him that she's not interested, the only thing left to do is to just ignore him. And contacting the authorities rarely pans out, according to the book.