Direct vs indirect method history and psychology

[archimedes]

In brief is the indirect method more North American or anglospheric, and the direct method more Eastern european?


Optional:
Here's my back story if you want it because Chase diagnosed me as Asperger's and that made so much sense to me and explained so much of my life and I'm proud of it l, but I have to understand, because the more I do the more I benefit.

I was aware of the gaming community in the early 2000s and I dove into it and I even performed well at first but I quit that indirect b******* stuff when I discovered the direct method and I resonated with that so completely. "That's me. I'm direct method preferentially"

But I grew up in the United States and I'm from the United States and maybe I take double punishment for being aspie and direct. Not needy or easy. I am to be powerful but direct and plain spoken. I'm really getting into Kenny Rogers and that's a guy I like no b******* that doesn't mean I show all my cards but I don't think I should have to open the ugly girl and befriend all the guys and neg and all that unless I'm truly enjoying myself but I don't want to avoid the good stuff out of pride or laziness either but it just seems like direct method is superior ethically morally masculine-wise time wise efficiency wise and everything like Achilles.

Mystery created a very very indirect method in Canada and I don't deny he gets results whereas people like Shark from Croatia came out and taught a direct method and being like a prince and going for what you want and that resonated with me so much more but i haven't done well. I just haven't done well in my own country the United states. I've done well in life and I'm an impressive man over all and I don't think I'm weak or a fool or lack backbone.

Maybe I'm just not executing well but maybe me choosing a more direct method is an element of why things don't go as well as they should, maybe something in the American Spirit hates that or maybe it would like that in Montana but not in most places. Maybe it's looked at as being freaky or needy or even insecure.

Also btw in America everything is moralized like oh you're too needy or you're not masculine enough for your too macho or your too this too that. Everything is become a moral failing, so much so that America is all about irony and plausible deniability. I thought in this environment those who are direct could shine even brighter as men with balls but instead you just get kind of mocked or misinterpreted like you're a fool

No I don't know if I'm on to something or I'm just rationalizing my failure. That's where I seek insight but since I you fuggs are anonymous arseholes on the internet I have to learn how to weight you

Maybe these two methods came up because two different geographies had two different value systems or maybe that's just my own nonsense

 

[Chase]

@archimedes,

Indirect works fine in Eastern Europe. I know; I have used it there myself. So have Teevster and other guys on the forum.

Direct works fine in the US / Anglosphere. I have used it there plenty myself as well. Hector Castillo's whole style is built around it.

Maybe there is some slight bias toward one or the other in X region or Y region. I have done a lot of opening all over the world and I cannot really say I have seen anywhere with a strong bias more in favor of direct or indirect, etc. Though you do need to calibrate the opener more to certain local areas (e.g., frame the direct or indirect opener a bit differently, etc.).

Direct can work for Aspies in the US. The challenge is that it is going to serve as a filter, getting you many clearer responses, including a lot of rejections and a few acceptances. The problem is Aspies really struggle getting the framing and delivery down right so that their compliments are really hitting right and creating the right effects. They also tend to take a while to get their vibe down right, presentation, etc.

It is definitely doable, and there are multiple Aspies who have gotten solid enough at the approach. I discussed some here:

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But it seems like it is pretty rough learning, with a much lengthier learning curve than a neurotypical guy has to go through.

Anyway, @Tank was I believe largely opening direct. He was in California. The guy I referenced knowing who'd been searching for a wife for 20 years always opened direct (and had shagged a bunch of girls... but still had not found his wife). That guy was in Washington, D.C. So 100% doable for Aspies running direct in the USA.

I don't know how you feel about online game but I have seen a lot of Aspies say online has been a Godsend for them, as it eliminates the whole initial approach part it's so hard for Aspies to get right. Online is just getting the right pics and getting the profile and messaging down, which is all stuff that can be optimized and repeated over and over. Far fewer variables to deal with using online. The only challenge is quality (e.g., if you are in the "look for a wife" stage), but there are guys who deal with that too (I know a guy who coaches guys on puling quality girls off online).

Chase