Chase has been telling us to be a fighter all the time and do not yield. But sometimes this could lead you into dangerous situations. For example two guys shot each other to death over a black Friday sale in front of a Walmart store. How do we avoid situations like this?
Do we have to be dominant all the time?
- Thread starter Franky
- Start date
- Joined
- Nov 21, 2012
- Messages
- 529
Franky said:
This sounds like a case of finding balance. Here's the thing in the above example sounds more like a combination of being reckless and pride. When referring to dominance Chase is more talking about don't let a girl push you around. Chase is saying remember to be sexy and don't begin to start chasing a girl. Being dominant normally applies to you interactions with women. Some people do go on the extreme spectrum and that's how you have cases like in the above example. A dominant man has control over his emotions and doesn't react emotionally and normally won't let this go to that level as in the example above. Hope that clears things up a little.
Thanks for the reply Just_Dave. Actually being dominant not only applies to interactions with girls but also applies to your everyday life like Chase said In his post on How to be a dominant man:
To start with, you need to know the most important rule of dominance, success, and victory: always find a way to win.
That means you can never concede. You can never give up. You must always get a success or at the very least do things on your terms.
Your boss asks you to stay late: "I've really got to get out of here but I'm happy to do some work from home later tonight if it's mission critical or otherwise get on that first thing tomorrow."
Your girlfriend tries to reschedule: "Okay, let's meet right now then and then you can go see your friends," or, "Actually I'm going to be booked up for the next week. If you can't make tonight let's reschedule after next week."
Your parents yell at you for racking up credit card debt: "You guys are right, I should've been more careful, but instead of yell at me, what can you do to help or what recommendations can you make for me to get back on track?"
Strangers say they can't help you: "Yes you can. You can help me. You're the only one who can help me -- how do we make this work?"
Being dominant isn't about being a loud-mouthed asshole. Learning how to be a dominant man is about learning how to control the situation -- how to get a satisfactory result no matter the circumstances, how to prevent others who are trying to dominate you from being able to, how to keep your testosterone levels high and keep the winner effect on and fight having your testosterone slashed and your will to win and confidence and assertiveness and risk taking broken.
To start with, you need to know the most important rule of dominance, success, and victory: always find a way to win.
That means you can never concede. You can never give up. You must always get a success or at the very least do things on your terms.
Your boss asks you to stay late: "I've really got to get out of here but I'm happy to do some work from home later tonight if it's mission critical or otherwise get on that first thing tomorrow."
Your girlfriend tries to reschedule: "Okay, let's meet right now then and then you can go see your friends," or, "Actually I'm going to be booked up for the next week. If you can't make tonight let's reschedule after next week."
Your parents yell at you for racking up credit card debt: "You guys are right, I should've been more careful, but instead of yell at me, what can you do to help or what recommendations can you make for me to get back on track?"
Strangers say they can't help you: "Yes you can. You can help me. You're the only one who can help me -- how do we make this work?"
Being dominant isn't about being a loud-mouthed asshole. Learning how to be a dominant man is about learning how to control the situation -- how to get a satisfactory result no matter the circumstances, how to prevent others who are trying to dominate you from being able to, how to keep your testosterone levels high and keep the winner effect on and fight having your testosterone slashed and your will to win and confidence and assertiveness and risk taking broken.
- Joined
- Nov 21, 2012
- Messages
- 529
Very valid comments and along with what you listed I would add, standing by your decisions and being your own man and no over reacting to things.
In the above example I would still have self control and not let things escalate that fair. It's okay to be angry but don't let your anger control you. Be proactive and not put yourself in bad and dangerous situations. Some guys feel like they have something to prove and end up dead. It has to be something worth fighting for. At the end of the day you're the one that has to live with the decisions that you've made.
In the above example I would still have self control and not let things escalate that fair. It's okay to be angry but don't let your anger control you. Be proactive and not put yourself in bad and dangerous situations. Some guys feel like they have something to prove and end up dead. It has to be something worth fighting for. At the end of the day you're the one that has to live with the decisions that you've made.
The hard part is to find the balance. The real world is always messier. How would you react in the following scenario: you and your girl walking down the street. A guy elbowed your girl. Instead of saying sorry this guy turn his head and stared at your girl. What would you do in this case? You let it go your girl would think you're weak. If you don't this could escalate to a fight. How to be dominant in this case?
Franky said:
"Instead of staring with those puppy eyes, why don't you apologize"
Wow that rhymes lol.
Franky said:
Escalate, certainly.
It will rarely end in an actual fight (but be prepared for it to do so) It will more likely be a case of brinksmanship which can go on for quite some time. He would not enjoy a fight either, and he does not know how it will turn out for him, especially if faced with someone who is being confident and aggressive.
Not easy to respond in an assertive way for some guys, for others it seems to come naturally.
Think of some strong,combative people you know and think how they would react (also watch films).
For example you could stare at him scornfully then shake your head and walk away saying "Dick!"
Or say "Hey! Easy Mate!"
Or "Er, Excuse me, what the fuck do you think you're doing?"
If it does come to a fight and you get pasted you will still keep the equilibrium with your girl more than if you did nothing, but don't assume you would get pasted.
Of course if you don't want a potential fight it is perfectly legitimate to avoid one but you have to pay the price for that.
The other problem, which I suffer from, is that such things take me by surprise. I am not able to muster a satisfactory reaction in the couple of seconds available. Very annoying.