Do You Generally Agree To Go On Dates With Time Constraits?

[Big Daddy]

Quick one, gents:

I'm not able to consistently pull girls in 15 minutes yet, it takes me a while to get warmed-up.

So whenever I invite a girl to go out and she gives me a time constraint ("I'm free from 2-4 pm") I'm not sure what's the most intelligent thing to do to from a logistics standpoint.

First, because I'm quite sure she's not thinking on fucking on the first date (even though she might be open to the idea, if she never did it before, probably she won't be thinking about it before the date).

Second, because if it takes me more than a while to get warmed-up, she might have a legitimate reason to leave so I'm left in an uphill battle.

Obviously the ideal scenario would be pushing for earlier lays, but until then, I'm content taking the smartest route. Inputs?

 

[Fuck This]

Doesn't Seppuku have good results from a 2 date model?

Use that quick date to seed the idea of a more intimate second date. Develop more options.

Sounds like a good way to screen for you...You know that is why she is doing it.

 

[Ambiance]

@Big Daddy

I'd add that you can try pushing your limits. I went through a phase where I just didn't give a fuck and would go through my process 2-3x faster than normal (and I was fast to begin with). Was pretty polarizing. Some girls I'd try to get to join me after 2 minutes of average conversation and it'd fall on its face. Other times I'd bring a girl back to my room after 20 minutes of grabbing food, only a moderate deep dive, and having just met her.

Also, it's not uncommon at all for a girl to say she has to leave by x, but then you guys get into whatever you're doing and she is excited about the prospect of something happening (assuming it isn't already happening) and x comes and goes. My thought is that girls give themselves an out should they need it.

You can also convince a girl to just keep hanging with you. It was either Ricardus or Chase who recommended probing for logistics and then hard-selling the girl on forgeting her plans and accompanying you in a smooth, debonair way, but I've never tried that particular method.

Ambiance

 

[Franco]

BD,

I'd say a time constraint is less of a problem than a "location constraint" when it comes to most dates. Time constraints are fluid; as was mentioned above by Ambiance, girls may set a time constraint before the date (often as an "escape" mechanism for a bad date) and then completely ignore it if the date is going extremely well.

Time constraints that are earlier in the day tend to pose more of a problem since it implies that their evening is not available (i.e. your 2 - 4 pm time constraint would be a little more of a red flag since it implies that she's busy later, which could potentially impact your plans to pull her back to your place). However, time constraints that are in the evening (i.e. she says she has to go at 8 or 9 pm) are often just defense mechanisms to give her an excuse to escape from a bad date. So I often acknowledge these and proceed anyway!

Location constraints are the only ones you should really consider rescheduling over. Even if a girl picks a place in the evening, poor logistics can completely botch any chance of you being able to capitalize on good attraction during a date. So if location is poor, I generally tend to suggest a better place (or re-schedule if necessary).

Hope that helps!

- Franco

 

[Ambiance]

@Franco

Time constraints that are earlier in the day tend to pose more of a problem since it implies that their evening is not available (i.e. your 2 - 4 pm time constraint would be a little more of a red flag since it implies that she's busy later, which could potentially impact your plans to pull her back to your place). However, time constraints that are in the evening (i.e. she says she has to go at 8 or 9 pm) are often just defense mechanisms to give her an excuse to escape from a bad date. So I often acknowledge these and proceed anyway!

That's some stellar insight. Makes me think that when you get a late evening T.C (I have to go to bed early!), that also gives you a good read on the girl's perception of you (a little hesitant and uncertain).

Location constraints are the only ones you should really consider rescheduling over. Even if a girl picks a place in the evening, poor logistics can completely botch any chance of you being able to capitalize on good attraction during a date. So if location is poor, I generally tend to suggest a better place (or re-schedule if necessary).

Another great point. A girl having to "leave" in 2 hours doesn't get in the way of the 5 Cs of Dating, but a bad location most certainly does, as I'm sure many guys on this forum, especially me after my latest FR, are aware

Ambiance

 

[Bboy100]

Depends on the context. If she's not too sold on you (i.e. high chance of flaking), I'd recommend going on the date just to get her more invested in you. If you think she's def. gonna go out with you even if its a little later on down the road, I'd just schedule for when you have more time.