Does it make you look weak/needy/desperate to always preemptively volunteer to clean/do some household task?

sinksink

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Jan 1, 2020
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Staying w/ a girl for a few months and not paying any rent, so I'm trying to make sure I don't get kicked out

does it look weak/desperate to always immediately volunteer to do some household task for her even not when asked

some dishes -> "I got it, *walks over and starts cleaning"

not asked about cleaning toilet, but toilet is mentioned at some point -> "I'll clean the toilet, where are the cleaning supplies?"

she casually mentions some kind of task she needs in a convo -> immedaitly jumping on it "I got it, when do you need me to do it?"

Like I am wondering if I continually very quickly jump onto volunteering to do these tasks this could set the wrong tone, I am not sure a high value guy would be so eager and fast to volunteer to do household tasks

How should you say it/go about it?
 

sinksink

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Yes. She’ll end up despising you and throwing you out. And you deserve it.

Get some self respect and do something to make a living and pay your way.

Think it's a bad idea to pre-emptively say "I'll clean this, I'll do X" when she brings up tasks she was going to do herself?
 

Vision

Tribal Elder
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Why don't you do it with her? If she starts cleaning dishes, don't tell her that you've got it... go over there, stand behind her... put your arms around her so that you're cleaning them with her... smell the back of her neck... then bend her over and fuck her silly in front of the sink.

After that, she'll want to do the dishes together, every time.
 
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ulrich

Cro-Magnon Man
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Just do it. Be nonchalant about it.
Don’t let her know in advance that you will do it… be unpredictable but do it.
The moment it becomes your chore… the moment she feels it is a given… you start losing manly points.

This is good to make her feel appreciated and cared for but it would be better if you find more masculines ways to add value to her life.
 

sinksink

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Just do it. Be nonchalant about it.
Don’t let her know in advance that you will do it… be unpredictable but do it.
The moment it becomes your chore… the moment she feels it is a given… you start losing manly points.

This is good to make her feel appreciated and cared for but it would be better if you find more masculines ways to add value to her life.

Do it at unpredictable times? Oh hm... Are you sure? Some people recommend making a list of responsibilities/expectations for household chores, do you think that's a bad idea?

How would you handle the chores/responsibilities long term if you were staying at your GF's place for a few months?
 

ulrich

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
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Do it at unpredictable times? Oh hm... Are you sure? Some people recommend making a list of responsibilities/expectations for household chores, do you think that's a bad idea?

How would you handle the chores/responsibilities long term if you were staying at your GF's place for a few months?

Both can work.
In my opinion helping in a typical “feminine” way like washing dishes or cleaning the house make you lose some manly points.
Not a problem, if you have plenty to spare.

If you’re staying less than three months, it’s going to feel like a novel situation, like you are some kind of guest and you can get away with many things.
Around the three months mark, she is going to get used to the dynamic so by that time you probably will want to bring some masculine value to the house.

How can you contribute in a way that makes you look manly?
Can you fix the car, lift heavy stuff or things like that?
 

Will_V

Chieftan
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What will get you kicked out is not whether you do the chores, but whether you are dominating her life or not.

You don't understand, a woman wants to do womanly things, she wants her man to do manly things. Just because it's her house doesn't change things.

Just look at it, what you're talking about is like the behavior of a man in a waning marriage, trying to find ways to negotiate with her so she doesn't leave him. It doesn't work in marriages, it sure as hell doesn't work with a girl you barely know. She doesn't need a butler, she doesn't need a cleaner, she doesn't need a sidekick or a maintenance robot. Her life was perfectly allright without them. What she needs is a man.

The fact that you are in her house, just means you need a stronger frame than ever. I think you would be better off acting like it's the house that belongs to you both, and she is your cute little housewife. Like Vision said, don't try to take over her responsibilities out of embarrassment but give her the validation and enjoyment of doing it that she could never get while living alone in her lonely life. Whether it's her house or not, you are still her reference point, her source of validation.

Think of it like this, if you give a woman a Lamborghini, what will she do with it? She will either sell it and get a Prius until she finds a man with a Lamborghini she can ride with, or she will find a man who can drive the Lamborghini the way it should be driven, so she can sit in the passenger seat and play around with her makeup. What she does NOT need is a man who sits in the passenger seat applying her makeup while she drives the Lamborghini.

It doesn't matter whether she owns the house and you don't, or she's the Tsarina of Russia and you're a peasant, there is only one way to a woman's heart and loyalty, and that's by fucking her well and dominating her life, and being the source of her validation.
 
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