Dominance techniques and methods

[Deg]

Richard,

The girl is trying to make an orbiter in that case a guy who she can share emotions and use for her personal support group but not a guy she would be interested in sleeping with but I do want to sleep with her. So I would start replying to her less and less and make her invest more and then I would only text to make plans to hangout and escalate?

 

[Rain]

- "Hey Deg, you should buy me a drink." (Assuming I'm somebody you respect, in this case)
- "Hey bro, buy me a drink." (Assuming I'm somebody you don't care much about)
- "I'm not doing so well in this class, can I copy off your test?" (chick in class)

-Richard

Thought I'd try answer this too maybe learn something.
Third one "No. If you end up being a doctor with no clue you'll hurt someone" Is that the ethical answer and/or the correct frame answer? This is assuming the test was happening in class right now, not sometime in future like Deg context.
If it was in future similar to what Deg said "I dunno about copying off me, but we could study together and I could teach you some things". Unsure if this is a good way to 'get a girl' because... even if you slept together during study... does she really like you or just wanted study help? I mean is their long term potential in that context, or more just a hookup for a favour?

I'd definitely rethink this one, that to me seems like a very negative answer to me, you don't want to tear the people around you down, even if what you are saying is true.

I'd probably go with something over the top self-deprecating "I don't know if you want to do that, I got the kidney confused with the spleen on the last one"
Or "Well this is awkward, I was just about to ask you for advice. Which organ is the one that pumps blood around again?"

Yes being negative with truth is maybe one of my struggles. I understand the self-depreciating is good, but their intention to not learn to be a dr properly still puts others at risk, as does riding a motorbike at 100through a CBD. Do you just not address these moral concerns and not worry about trying to change these people? Is there a way to try and get them to change without tearing them down? My initial response was probably like Sheldon Cooper!

 

[lostnumber]

- "Hey Deg, you should buy me a drink." (Assuming I'm somebody you respect, in this case)
- "Hey bro, buy me a drink." (Assuming I'm somebody you don't care much about)
- "I'm not doing so well in this class, can I copy off your test?" (chick in class)

-Richard

Thought I'd try answer this too maybe learn something.
Third one "No. If you end up being a doctor with no clue you'll hurt someone" Is that the ethical answer and/or the correct frame answer? This is assuming the test was happening in class right now, not sometime in future like Deg context.
If it was in future similar to what Deg said "I dunno about copying off me, but we could study together and I could teach you some things". Unsure if this is a good way to 'get a girl' because... even if you slept together during study... does she really like you or just wanted study help? I mean is their long term potential in that context, or more just a hookup for a favour?

I'd definitely rethink this one, that to me seems like a very negative answer to me, you don't want to tear the people around you down, even if what you are saying is true.

I'd probably go with something over the top self-deprecating "I don't know if you want to do that, I got the kidney confused with the spleen on the last one"
Or "Well this is awkward, I was just about to ask you for advice. Which organ is the one that pumps blood around again?"

Yes being negative with truth is maybe one of my struggles. I understand the self-depreciating is good, but their intention to not learn to be a dr properly still puts others at risk, as does riding a motorbike at 100through a CBD. Do you just not address these moral concerns and not worry about trying to change these people? Is there a way to try and get them to change without tearing them down? My initial response was probably like Sheldon Cooper!

It depends on your goal. If your primary objective is to change someones behavior, sometimes giving them a reality check and a burst of negative reinforcement can be an effective method. But very rarely will it win you friends or get girls in your bed. The #1 WORST thing you can do from a seduction perspective is express negative judgement against the person you are trying to build a connection with. Being judgmental is utter toxin to developing rapport and you will find it closes people off to you faster than you can say Big Bang Theory

If this is something you struggle with my recommendation would be to try and re-calibrate and shrink the range of "Morally offense" behaviors that you feel the need to try and change. There are some things that ARE over the line, and you shouldn't be afraid to call them out when they occur, but I get the impression that your list is a lot longer than mine.

 

[Drck]

"let's say that a girl is fairly attracted to you but she doesn't put time aside to spend with you; you know she's around some other men but she keeps texting you and calls you once in a while (semi-daily) - how do you find the win-win in that situation? What does she want and what do you want and how do you present it?"

Hmm, not that I want to be a smart ass, but this is rather standard scenario especially if the girl is really good looking. If she is available she will have several guys that are interested in her, including orbitals. She will talk/text to more guys. I don't know how many, but say 5-10 is reasonable number, but I wouldn't be surprised if much more. Sometimes way more...

What you as a guy want is clear - her. What she as a girl wants is also clear - the highest value available guy to her. Sometimes, unfortunately, what she perceives as a high value guy might be different than what you believe is high value guy...

There is no magic bullet, you may text what you want and she may decide to go for you, or not. You may fool only girls that are inexperienced, but you won't fool girls that have been around, she'll see through you. She may decide to give you a fair chance where you might show your skills, but again, don't forget that there are also bunch of other guys that might be great match/value for her as well. Here is where your skills may be useful, e.g. recognizing window and moving forward...

In other words you are just one of the many guys in her group, she may play for a while with each of you, and then she'll chose the one which she perceives the highest value...

The more guys she has in her pool, the lesser value of each guy is. She simply has lots of choices, which makes your (any guy) sperm cheap. She can replace you anytime she wants, and you can't virtually do anything (if you exclude chasing)...

The only way you can 'win' is to have higher value, and even then I wouldn't be so sure because a guy who wants to 'win' any girl is lowering his value...

I'm not saying that you are wrong, you may get the girl, especially if the other guys have lower value, but gain - there is simply no magic bullet, let's keep it real...

 

[Drck]

Deg: I am still workinng on that and I want to learn Dominance as a skill. So , i am looking for some steps, or tips, or a guide to getting what I want(being dominant).

Check out confidence (I bet you are already aware), IMO it is more valuable than dominance. There are perhaps just slight differences in between these two, but confidence is easier.

Figher A: Is confident that he will beat Fighter B, who is also confident.
Fighter A: wins, he is more dominant. Ok, but Fighter B is also confident, he goes on with fights, he is not afraid to challenge again. Both are attrative

Fighter X is not confident at all, but beats Fighter Y who is really confident, even after fight
Fighter X wins, he is more dominant, but but continues to be hesitant. He is not as attractive as Fighter Y who remains confident...

Guy A is really dominant. Boss tells him to stay late at work. Guy A burts in anger, slams the door, hits the wall with fist. Ok, great, he gets fired but he remains really dominant. Still dominant and attractive, but lost his job
Guy B is confident, boss tells him to stay late at work. "No problem boss, just make sure you show it on my paycheck" - smile, walks out, and one day becomes rich. Hopefully LOL. But remains confident, thus attractive
Guy C is not confident at all. Boss tells him to do something today, he tries to negotiate, but because he is weak and hesitant, he will have to stay not till 6 but till 8. The same next week, and week after that too...

Girl says to confident Guy A: Hey, you should really buy me a drink. Some answers:
* Sure sweety, and what you gonna do for me? (or: but first you'll have to do this and that for me...)
* I will be happy to buy you a drink, we can then sit right there and talk about abc...
* Nah, I don't feel like to buying you drink today, but if you meet me tomorrow I'll buy you two drinks, blah blah...
* Ok, here is a drink...
* Wide smile: Cool...

But here is a trick: it doesn't really matter WHAT you say. Words are important only up to some level, but not really that much. You can say whatever you want - as long as you remain confident... It depends HOW you say it (remain confident)...

So you should focus more on attitude rather than words. If you start thinking too much it will appear that you are trying too hard. You just say what you want to say, what comes to your mind - as long as you remain confident...

Good job with the lifting btw