Examples of people trying to tool you and how you dealt with it?

dark hawk

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Dec 29, 2020
Messages
27
Could you guys explain what being tooled means exactly, I read Chase's article on it but it is still unclear to me, also how did you deal with attempts to tool you?
 

Regal Tiger

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Mar 16, 2015
Messages
422
A previous boss would constantly and 'accidentally' get in my way at work. Then say sorry, I didn't see you there. At first I didn't think anything of it but after a while I started noticing he would see me and pretend not to out of the corner of his eye and would literally only do it while other people were around.

So I took a page out of Lucio's (powermoves) playbook: instead of allowing him to take the frame of "I can get in your way and say sorry and not mean it which makes you seem below me" I took the frame of "I'm higher up and I can forgive you". The tonality is hard to explain but I kind of over-the-top said "It's okay man, I know you're in a hurry and I forgive you" making sure to pat him on the arm like a little child.

As I was walking away he just kind of got stunned and asked "you forgive me?" The look on his face still makes me chuckle.

As petty as it sounds, this literally never happened again further reinforcing that it was on purpose.


That's a personal example, but here's one of the classic examples of a guy trying to tool you so you don't get a girl:

Guy A: yeah, I dunno what it is about ole Dark Hawk but the guy just cannot get laid for the life of him. *turning to a girl you like* say, why is it that you think girls don't want to fuck him? [credit goes to Chase on this one, and I myself have used this a few times lol]


In a hypothetical like this the guy is tooling you while pretending to look out for you and see where your weaknesses are so you can improve. But what's actually happening under the surface is that he's making you out to look like a guy who girls don't like in front of a girl you like. He's putting you down in a subtle way.

Which really, is all tooling is, is a way to make someone else look better at your expense or vice versa.



Here's another obvious example from TV shows: catty women.

Oh honey, that makeup is just darling! My great grandmother used to love that same style!

Those shoes are so gorgeous! And they totally mask the size of your feet!


Shit like that.

EDIT: another way to think about it is like this: if someone is telling you that they're looking out for you or just being friendly or whatever, yet you feel like you're being put down, then 99% of the time someone's tooling you.
 
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