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- Jan 24, 2021
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Like everybody else, I've set a bunch of goals for myself this year. And perhaps like everyone else too, I was keenly aware of all the goals that I set at the beginning of 2022 and completely failed to reach (and in some cases, didn't even try).
Foremost on my mind as I began the first week of the new year was one question: what happened to those goals last year? What can I do to prevent it happening again? Because if I cannot solve this problem, there's no point making goals at all.
I was watching an old Tate video the other day, and he said something that I thought was not only very useful, but very practical: get into the habit of saying things and then doing them, no matter what, no matter how hard, and it makes your word magic.
The idea is that over time, to you and everyone else around you, your word becomes the constructor of reality. If you will never allow yourself to lie about what you will do, it first makes you very careful about what you say, and then it makes your word an incredibly powerful thing. Through repetition, like a well trained dog, your body and mind pull immediately toward a goal as soon as the command comes out of your mouth "I will ..." And people listen to you, because they have seen what happens when you speak.
...
I like to do 1 week experiments, one of the ones I did last year for example was 1000 pushups and 1000 situps in a week (I ended up around 1200 pushups and 1000 situps). A week is long enough to be useful, but short enough to be immediate. There's no waiting around when you only have one week - unlike a whole year.
So this week I decided I will say things aloud and then do them. It doesn't matter if I enjoy them, it doesn't matter if I still consider them valuable later on, I will simply complete them, because I said so. Nothing matters except the continuity between word and action. Nothing else will give me satisfaction.
It's the third day so far. Right away, I turned this weapon upon things that I had put off a long time. It didn't matter if it gave me any satisfaction to do them, it didn't matter if I did them the 'right' way, the only thing I cared about is 'I spoke, and it happened'. It's easy to say something. Why shouldn't it be as easy to have it happen?
And something unexpected happened, as I repeatedly spoke and acted. My sense of self and my intent became overwhelmingly present to me - they were right there in front of me, being materialized over and over again every time I spoke my intention and it rapidly became reality. Anxiety about the problems that still face me, problems that I still don't know how to solve, faded away. And as I walked through the world, my face was set like stone, my walk became an effortless glide, and my mind was filled with a deep sense of satisfaction and joy. Even thinking about very difficult problems filled me with restless energy rather than anxiety.
Why did this happen? Because I had strengthened one thing: my sense of self. Through that one channel, all the fears and anxieties that lurked at the back of my mind faded away out of focus, lost their grip on my mind and body, and only one thing took center stage: I speak and it happens, therefore I am.
...
I've always been fascinated and puzzled by the concept of fear. Unbounded fear or anxiety (and I went through a period of severe social anxiety when younger) is one of the most unpleasant and 'painful' things to experience, yet there is no real physical sensation. Where does it reside? How does it have this effect upon the human experience if not through the body? How can something that produces no substantial physical pain be worse than some of the worst physical pain I've experienced?
And even physical pain, what does it even mean? What makes it unbearable? Where does it reside? What are its atomic components?
I've had a theory for some time about the concept of pain that may have some validity, or not. This idea is that all pain is unbearable because it constitutes a loss and disintegration of identity of the consciousness, which identifies with the unity of the body which is under attack. Thus emotional pain and physical pain are both very difficult to bear, even though one is 'real' and the other is 'not real'. Because they both are an alarm signal that the identity, the Self, is at risk of dissolution. That is the true enemy.
Regardless, it made me realize something: fear is not the problem, anxiety is not the problem, pain is not the problem. The problem is the loss of self.
Think about the people who seem to have the easiest time, who effortlessly dominate the world around them and win, who seize the attention and investment of those who have turned their eyes away from the self to look for the reinforcement of their identity in outward things. These are people who are manifestly inhabiting their present Self and are so aware of it that it exudes from their every action. They know who they are, what they want, and they are so used to immediately bridging the gap between the reality that comes from within their own minds and the one that their eyes see in front of them that intention itself produces virtually no anxiety before the result comes as a matter of course.
And those who have the most difficult time, are those who continually and repeatedly experience a loss of self - the 'nice guy', the tryhard guy, the guy who has been trained to give in to fear. The people who are continuously saying things to themselves and others that are not or do not become true, who give a false account of themselves and continue promising reality an outcome that they cannot or will not deliver, have their own words come to the prosecution of their identity. After a while, they come to experience the deep pain of having no idea who they are, they wake up unable to get out of bed or do anything because to do something requires having intent, and having intent requires knowing what you want, and knowing what you want requires knowing something about who you are.
The problem is, someone who has spent a long time experiencing the disintegration of their Self, as many guys do, finds it very difficult to understand what the Self is, where it has gone, and what would constitute having it back. Anything that occurs over a long enough period of time overwrites even the reference points that someone might naturally have, and what results is disorientation and the inability to move forward, especially against any resistance.
It is not OK to not be able to say something and have it happen as a matter of course, not even for a short while. And so that is why I suggest doing as I have done, and making it your primary goal for 2023 to ensure that everything that comes out of your mouth materializes into reality, regardless of how difficult or painful it is to achieve. Think carefully about what you say, because you must put yourself through hell if necessary to make it happen. Begin small, a verbal promise followed by immediate action, and work your way up to your biggest goals. Because that is the most fundamental way to re-create and properly align the Self in such a way that everything you desire becomes a reality, rather than a litany of false promises.
Happy new year!
Foremost on my mind as I began the first week of the new year was one question: what happened to those goals last year? What can I do to prevent it happening again? Because if I cannot solve this problem, there's no point making goals at all.
I was watching an old Tate video the other day, and he said something that I thought was not only very useful, but very practical: get into the habit of saying things and then doing them, no matter what, no matter how hard, and it makes your word magic.
The idea is that over time, to you and everyone else around you, your word becomes the constructor of reality. If you will never allow yourself to lie about what you will do, it first makes you very careful about what you say, and then it makes your word an incredibly powerful thing. Through repetition, like a well trained dog, your body and mind pull immediately toward a goal as soon as the command comes out of your mouth "I will ..." And people listen to you, because they have seen what happens when you speak.
...
I like to do 1 week experiments, one of the ones I did last year for example was 1000 pushups and 1000 situps in a week (I ended up around 1200 pushups and 1000 situps). A week is long enough to be useful, but short enough to be immediate. There's no waiting around when you only have one week - unlike a whole year.
So this week I decided I will say things aloud and then do them. It doesn't matter if I enjoy them, it doesn't matter if I still consider them valuable later on, I will simply complete them, because I said so. Nothing matters except the continuity between word and action. Nothing else will give me satisfaction.
It's the third day so far. Right away, I turned this weapon upon things that I had put off a long time. It didn't matter if it gave me any satisfaction to do them, it didn't matter if I did them the 'right' way, the only thing I cared about is 'I spoke, and it happened'. It's easy to say something. Why shouldn't it be as easy to have it happen?
And something unexpected happened, as I repeatedly spoke and acted. My sense of self and my intent became overwhelmingly present to me - they were right there in front of me, being materialized over and over again every time I spoke my intention and it rapidly became reality. Anxiety about the problems that still face me, problems that I still don't know how to solve, faded away. And as I walked through the world, my face was set like stone, my walk became an effortless glide, and my mind was filled with a deep sense of satisfaction and joy. Even thinking about very difficult problems filled me with restless energy rather than anxiety.
Why did this happen? Because I had strengthened one thing: my sense of self. Through that one channel, all the fears and anxieties that lurked at the back of my mind faded away out of focus, lost their grip on my mind and body, and only one thing took center stage: I speak and it happens, therefore I am.
...
I've always been fascinated and puzzled by the concept of fear. Unbounded fear or anxiety (and I went through a period of severe social anxiety when younger) is one of the most unpleasant and 'painful' things to experience, yet there is no real physical sensation. Where does it reside? How does it have this effect upon the human experience if not through the body? How can something that produces no substantial physical pain be worse than some of the worst physical pain I've experienced?
And even physical pain, what does it even mean? What makes it unbearable? Where does it reside? What are its atomic components?
I've had a theory for some time about the concept of pain that may have some validity, or not. This idea is that all pain is unbearable because it constitutes a loss and disintegration of identity of the consciousness, which identifies with the unity of the body which is under attack. Thus emotional pain and physical pain are both very difficult to bear, even though one is 'real' and the other is 'not real'. Because they both are an alarm signal that the identity, the Self, is at risk of dissolution. That is the true enemy.
Regardless, it made me realize something: fear is not the problem, anxiety is not the problem, pain is not the problem. The problem is the loss of self.
Think about the people who seem to have the easiest time, who effortlessly dominate the world around them and win, who seize the attention and investment of those who have turned their eyes away from the self to look for the reinforcement of their identity in outward things. These are people who are manifestly inhabiting their present Self and are so aware of it that it exudes from their every action. They know who they are, what they want, and they are so used to immediately bridging the gap between the reality that comes from within their own minds and the one that their eyes see in front of them that intention itself produces virtually no anxiety before the result comes as a matter of course.
And those who have the most difficult time, are those who continually and repeatedly experience a loss of self - the 'nice guy', the tryhard guy, the guy who has been trained to give in to fear. The people who are continuously saying things to themselves and others that are not or do not become true, who give a false account of themselves and continue promising reality an outcome that they cannot or will not deliver, have their own words come to the prosecution of their identity. After a while, they come to experience the deep pain of having no idea who they are, they wake up unable to get out of bed or do anything because to do something requires having intent, and having intent requires knowing what you want, and knowing what you want requires knowing something about who you are.
The problem is, someone who has spent a long time experiencing the disintegration of their Self, as many guys do, finds it very difficult to understand what the Self is, where it has gone, and what would constitute having it back. Anything that occurs over a long enough period of time overwrites even the reference points that someone might naturally have, and what results is disorientation and the inability to move forward, especially against any resistance.
It is not OK to not be able to say something and have it happen as a matter of course, not even for a short while. And so that is why I suggest doing as I have done, and making it your primary goal for 2023 to ensure that everything that comes out of your mouth materializes into reality, regardless of how difficult or painful it is to achieve. Think carefully about what you say, because you must put yourself through hell if necessary to make it happen. Begin small, a verbal promise followed by immediate action, and work your way up to your biggest goals. Because that is the most fundamental way to re-create and properly align the Self in such a way that everything you desire becomes a reality, rather than a litany of false promises.
Happy new year!
