FR first approaches ever

[Wanderer]

Hi guys! I've been reading articles and forum posts on this site for a long time now, but I've never actually taken any action to improve with girls. No more! I'm in Barcelona now, and with a huge amount of cute girls everywhere there's no excuse for me not to practice.

I will start tomorrow by asking 10 girls for directions, just to get used to approaching, and the day after I will progress to indirect-direct opening, and after that I'll either continue with indirect-direct for a few more days or try other openers. I'm really nervous, but it's time for me to do this, and I know that if I don't hold myself accountable I will just make up some excuse again.

Some background information: I'm eighteen years old, and traveling through Europe on a very tight budget with two friends. This site has helped me a lot with theoretically understanding seduction and social interactions, but until now I've been way too much of a p**sy and haven't put any of that book knowledge into practice. I hope to one day master seduction, and I realize that I'll have to get out there, so here I go.

 

[Wanderer]

Day 1

So, today I went out and asked ten girls for directions, to get a feel for what it's like to talk to attractive girls. One girl 'rejected' me when I said "hello", just waved me away, but it was no big deal, and I actually feel better now that I've been rejected once.
I got into a small conversation with another girl, but it died down after a minute or two and we went our own ways. She said she was going to 'montjuic' (a tourist site) and asked me if I'd been there. I said no, she asked me why not. She was going there, and I could have asked her about that place and perhaps joined her, but I kind of froze and didn't do that. That's definitely something I need to do next time; she was very warm and was asking me some questions about my trip and stuff right away.
The other girls just gave directions, nothing special.

I do feel like today has warmed me up for the real approaches, even tho it might have sounded way too easy. Even tho I was just asking for directions, it still was a little scary to talk to hot girls. Tomorrow I'll do at least three indirect direct approaches.

 

[Starboy]

Hey man we dont know each other but I just want to say that im proud of you for going out today to talk to girls. I've been reading gc for a longtime too since last april,but I never cold approached girls because I was lazy,fearful,too stressed out,insecurity blah blah blah all the excuses you can think of. I'm about to turn 22 this month and ur already trying at 18 which is impressive. Just know you got my support and I believe in you!

 

[Fuck This]

Keep it going. Ask checkers how their day is going when you are in stores. Thank them. Pretty soon it is second nature to greet people when you encounter them

Bank tellers are instructed to interact with their customers by greeting them by name, ask them how their day is going, and ask about plans. Knowing they are going to do that you can rehearse before going in. Doing that every day makes you better at small talk.

This is a convo I've had a number of variations of... (the most entertaining one was the Midget that invited me to Drag Queen Bingo)

Hello Gretchen, Good to see you again.

My day is good so far, I've got some good classes this semester that really interest me.

I've got a Lab tonight at 7 and a mid term tomorrow.

Weekend? well I'm going to find a place to hang out Friday night before I catch the train home Saturday morning for the break.

Yeah I'd love to see you sing Karaoke. Put your number in my phone here and we will connect for Friday night...

 

[Wanderer]

Day 2

First of all, thank you, Fuck This and Ben200 for supporting me. I really appreciate it.

As for today, man I was scared. I walked around for literally five hours along the busiest streets I could find, but was too afraid to actually approach. A couple of times I got really close to approaching, was walking towards a girl and twice I opened my mouth, but at the last moment I turned away. I got approached like 3 times tho for directions and about 10 times by people trying to sell me weed, haha.

At about 10 in the evening I told myself that I really had to approach a girl now, so when I walked past a cute girl, I made myself turn around and talked to her. I asked her where the rambla was (one of the main streets, we were on it).
The plan was that I'd say I was just kidding and tell her I simply thought she was cute and wanted to talk to her or something like that. However, she just gave me a very confused look after I asked her where the rambla was and said "la rambla?" And instead of telling her I thought she was attractive I just mumbled "yeah- rambla-". She said "here?" And again I was telling myself to say "I know, I just thought you were cute, and thought I'd talk to you." But the only sound that came out of my mouth was a grunt and then a hurried thank you, followed by me walking away at a far quicker than nomal pace.

Tommorow I will try the indirect direct opener again, and will talk to the cashier at the grocery store, and perhaps some other people if I can think of a way to talk to them. I'm also thinking about starting with opening less attractive girls, as I'm not as shy around them as around stunners.

 

[Fuck This]

Yeah you gotta just get used to having a conversation before you try to actually get something out of it. Stopping people on a busy street is tough even for seasoned vets. Find places where people are waiting for food, for coffee, for the bus or train etc. That's a place people expect a greeting and small talk.

Read this: https://www.artofmanliness.com/articles ... mall-talk/


Really think about a cashiering job just to get the reps of greeting people and doing smalltalk. Might as well get paid to practice.

 

[Mr.Rob]

Persevere my friend. The first time I tried cold approaching was on vacation in Ecuador and I wandered around aimlessly trying to summon up the courage for hours on end as well.

Eventually I kept pushing myself a bit more and more and eventually overcame it for the most part.

Took me 11 months to get a lay from it but it was well worth the effort and journey.

Hope you keep it up till you achieve what you never thought in your wildest dreams to be possible.

 

[Wanderer]

Day 3 (salsa lesson in a club)

Thanks guys! I skimmed through that article and it definitely looks like it has a bunch of useful tips. I'll read it tommorow morning (it's midnight here). Also, good to hear that I'm not alone in that, haha.

I talked to the cashier today, asked her how her day was, but nothing more than that. It was raining like crazy, so no street gaming today, but I looked online and found a beginners salsa class in some club, so I decided to go there.

This was my first time in a club so I didn't really know what to expect, but it was just a small bar with a small dance floor next to it. Luckily there was someone waiting at the entrance and he greeted me and kind of got me going socially. I read somewhere on this site that you should start talking to people right away, so I did that. Otherwise it would've been pretty awkward probably. It felt a little uncomfortable, but not too bad.

After about twenty minutes of that, the class started. There were three girls who were close to my age, and one of them kept looking at me in the beginning.
At first we danced a little bit solo, to learn the basic moves, and then we paired up. I paired up with one of the other three girls; the one that looked at me was too far away and paired up way before I would have been able to get there. I tried making eye contact, but she kept looking away while we danced.
About three minutes later we had to rotate, so then I was dancing with girls who were at least ten years older than me until I got to the second girl. No special connection.

Then I got to the third girl and we had some good eye contact and it was going pretty well, but the music stopped and it was break time. She walked away right away and started talking to her friend, and one of the people I had talked to started talking to me. I talked with the same people until the second half of the lesson started. I ended up starting next to that third girl, but we were rotating the other way so I didn't dance with her. Ended uo with girl #1, had decent eye contact this time.

After that second part I went to the bathroom. By the time I got back all three were dancing with other guys and everyone was in a conversation. I tried to talk to some people, but couldn't really get in. After what I now think was only five minutes of standing around I decided to leave.

So, talking to guys, and girls in their late twenties and older is not much of a problem, but when I was around the girls of my age I stiffened up. Also need to figure out how to open a group of people in conversation.
I guess what I should have done was not go to the bathroom, and instead take the hands of the girl that showed some interest and dance with her. Or otherwise at least just stand around for a while until I found a way to talk to someone. Anyway, now I know a bit more what to expect the next time I enter a club, and now I can dance a little bit as well.

 

[Wanderer]

Day 4: I did it!

Hi guys, I approached a girl today without freezing. I guess my balls have grown. First time ever, anywhere (with romantic intentions).

I had been walking around for 4+ hours and really wanted to go home, it was 11 p.m. (30 minutes ago). However, I kept telling myself I couldn't go home unless I talked to a girl, and I had bought myself a nice smoothie that I could only drink if I approached a girl. So, when a girl walked by I told myself I really should go talk to her. I turned around, and it went something like this:

Me: Hello.
Girl: *looks at me*
Me: Do you speak English?
Girl: Yes
Me: Are you single.
Girl: No.
Me: Okay!
Girl: That's it? You just wanted to know?
Me: Yup! Ciao

Followed by me walking away, feeling like a king. I know I probably could've stayed in the conversation longer, but I don't really care at this point. I f**king did it! You wouldn't believe how scared I was before. But, I got the ball rolling, it's game on now.

By the way, Fuck This, thanks for that article! I read it, it had a lot of great stuff in it, it'll come in handy soon.