- Joined
- Jul 20, 2015
- Messages
- 1,532
Hi friends,
I believe I presented myself as a boyfriend candidate to a girl who told me she wasn't looking for relationships. Now I'm trying to get out of it and I'm looking for help. Here's the story:
____________________________
Two months ago I was at the mall and met a girl named Talia. We connected well. There were some initial frames set in our first interaction:
Later:
I got her number - she was quite enthusiastic when I texted her. We made plans twice, but both times they fell through. I was surprised how she continued to put effort into meeting up with me despite this.
We ended up meeting at a coffee shop. We sat across from each other. She seemed a bit reserved at first, but conversation flowed easily and soon she was opening up - she started talking REALLY fast. I did a palm read on her and did a cold read on her love life. She got very excited because I was right about it all.
After a while we left and walked to a park, and during the walk I did some light touching on her shoulders and arms. For some reason it didn't feel right. I backed off and just stuck with accidental touch. We sat at a picnic table at the park. Again, we were sitting across from each other. I started teasing her a little bit and she started getting more emotionally involved in the conversation. I tell her to come back to my place to see my pets - she says that she won't have time because she has to go see her friend in a bit. I persist, but she is firm...she says she can't. (I definitely asked her too early). Huh, oh well. I live 20 minutes away by bus anyways, so the logistics weren't the greatest. I bring up the topic of sex several times through our conversation, but I don't focus on it too much.
We walk around the park some more. I start being a lot more mysterious and avoid answering her questions. Since she's busy later I have to adjust my strategy. Should I try to escalate hard on her in public? Maybe bang her in a washroom? Or should I just chill, move a bit slower and save the fun stuff for a potential second date? We stop walking around and sit on a bench. Not very closely together, though. I am touching her leg every so often.
It's been about 1.5 hours since we met up. We are chatting - but conversation isn't flowing like it used to. There's more pauses and the conversation is less interesting. Then we start getting back into good conversation again. She is talking about how she just broke up with her boyfriend like a week ago. She says they broke up because there's not an emotional connection and he doesn't understand her. However she is very sexually attracted to him and the sex is great. She feels a magnetized pull towards him that she's never felt before. While she's describing this, I run a pattern on her. She REALLY agrees with what I'm saying. After I'm done with the pattern I look at her lips. Immediately she licks her lips and her face suddenly changes - now she's got a really turned on look on her face. She is very warm with me after this, and becomes a little bit more submissive, and even starts giving me "almost touches." In my experience, when a girl does "almost touches" its because wants to touch you but isn't comfortable with it quite yet. I start slowing down the conversation like mad - I'm introducing a lot of pregnant pauses.
(Quick note: I find that girls bring up other guys when you've messed up with them. I feel like in this case maybe she had initially viewed me as a lover, but I built up too strong of an emotional connection and put myself in the boyfriend zone. She practically described her ex as the perfect lover, which was a contrast to my behaviour.)
After about 20 more minutes of chatting, she says she's hungry and I walk with her to go get food....my touches feel more natural this time. She's dragging me all over the place because she can't decide what she wants to eat. I wonder if she's drawing this out because she wants me to make a move. So I get some logistics:
Then we walk to the bus stop. Before she gets on her bus she says it was good to see me, gives me a hug, does a quick sort of linger like she wants me to kiss her, and says that we will hang out again sometime (from experience, when girls say this, i've usually messed up). I text her the next day (August 12th):
She never replied back. There's a chance she just forgot about my text, but I also feel like I set the wrong frame, definitely missed an escalation window, and let her lead a little bit too much. My questions are:
1. What should I text her?
2. What should I do in general? Go on another date, or invite her straight to my house?
I believe I presented myself as a boyfriend candidate to a girl who told me she wasn't looking for relationships. Now I'm trying to get out of it and I'm looking for help. Here's the story:
____________________________
Two months ago I was at the mall and met a girl named Talia. We connected well. There were some initial frames set in our first interaction:
Later:
I got her number - she was quite enthusiastic when I texted her. We made plans twice, but both times they fell through. I was surprised how she continued to put effort into meeting up with me despite this.
We ended up meeting at a coffee shop. We sat across from each other. She seemed a bit reserved at first, but conversation flowed easily and soon she was opening up - she started talking REALLY fast. I did a palm read on her and did a cold read on her love life. She got very excited because I was right about it all.
After a while we left and walked to a park, and during the walk I did some light touching on her shoulders and arms. For some reason it didn't feel right. I backed off and just stuck with accidental touch. We sat at a picnic table at the park. Again, we were sitting across from each other. I started teasing her a little bit and she started getting more emotionally involved in the conversation. I tell her to come back to my place to see my pets - she says that she won't have time because she has to go see her friend in a bit. I persist, but she is firm...she says she can't. (I definitely asked her too early). Huh, oh well. I live 20 minutes away by bus anyways, so the logistics weren't the greatest. I bring up the topic of sex several times through our conversation, but I don't focus on it too much.
We walk around the park some more. I start being a lot more mysterious and avoid answering her questions. Since she's busy later I have to adjust my strategy. Should I try to escalate hard on her in public? Maybe bang her in a washroom? Or should I just chill, move a bit slower and save the fun stuff for a potential second date? We stop walking around and sit on a bench. Not very closely together, though. I am touching her leg every so often.
It's been about 1.5 hours since we met up. We are chatting - but conversation isn't flowing like it used to. There's more pauses and the conversation is less interesting. Then we start getting back into good conversation again. She is talking about how she just broke up with her boyfriend like a week ago. She says they broke up because there's not an emotional connection and he doesn't understand her. However she is very sexually attracted to him and the sex is great. She feels a magnetized pull towards him that she's never felt before. While she's describing this, I run a pattern on her. She REALLY agrees with what I'm saying. After I'm done with the pattern I look at her lips. Immediately she licks her lips and her face suddenly changes - now she's got a really turned on look on her face. She is very warm with me after this, and becomes a little bit more submissive, and even starts giving me "almost touches." In my experience, when a girl does "almost touches" its because wants to touch you but isn't comfortable with it quite yet. I start slowing down the conversation like mad - I'm introducing a lot of pregnant pauses.
(Quick note: I find that girls bring up other guys when you've messed up with them. I feel like in this case maybe she had initially viewed me as a lover, but I built up too strong of an emotional connection and put myself in the boyfriend zone. She practically described her ex as the perfect lover, which was a contrast to my behaviour.)
After about 20 more minutes of chatting, she says she's hungry and I walk with her to go get food....my touches feel more natural this time. She's dragging me all over the place because she can't decide what she wants to eat. I wonder if she's drawing this out because she wants me to make a move. So I get some logistics:
Then we walk to the bus stop. Before she gets on her bus she says it was good to see me, gives me a hug, does a quick sort of linger like she wants me to kiss her, and says that we will hang out again sometime (from experience, when girls say this, i've usually messed up). I text her the next day (August 12th):
backstory: hey talia, yesterday was sick - you're super pleasant to talk to
talia: thanks!! you too
*THE NEXT DAY*
backstory: lets hang out next week? let me know your plans and we can figure something out
She never replied back. There's a chance she just forgot about my text, but I also feel like I set the wrong frame, definitely missed an escalation window, and let her lead a little bit too much. My questions are:
1. What should I text her?
2. What should I do in general? Go on another date, or invite her straight to my house?
