Flakes after first date make outs = Me Confused

[old-dog]

Hey guys this has happened to me several times and I'm not sure why. Not every time but often enough for me to want to nail it down.

I am very new to actually studying the art of pickup and seduction but I'm no rookie when it comes to getting laid. I am learning. Improving target quality and being more direct. This past week I had a date every night of the week just from a few weekend sarges.

What I'm finding strange is the flakes I'm getting and when I'm getting them.

I meet a girl. Chat her up and get her number. I text her (possibly too much) fun, flirty and entertaining texts while making plans to get together.

The first dates seem to on average go very well and we will make out the first night. My place/Her Place/ The car.
Or I meet a girl in a club. Make out and get her number.

I don't know what I must be doing wrong but I don't get a second date and sometimes don't even get a text message reply. They just drop me. Radio silence.

This happened again Thursday. I meet a girl at a club and got her number. She took a couple of days to respond but finally did(said there was family issues). We went out for tacos and beer then bounced for Ice cream. Conversation went well and while walking. She told me she was impressed with my ballsy direct approach and how other guys shes met are all pussies and how refreshing it was.

We ended at her apartment doing a lot of kissing and light touching but I got the vibe that she wanted me to leave before things got heavy so I said good night. I texted her something funny just after I left her place about being almost hit by a car. She responded for me to be safe.
Next day I sent her a text saying "You're just all kinds of lovely. Let's do it again soon". and I got no response. Total silence.
Jury is still out on if she's a flake as she has often taken long periods to respond.

But this pattern has repeated itself several times. They seem attracted enough to me to fool around (kiss and make out at the end of the date) but I can't seem to hook up with them again. I'm pretty sure I'm being congruent because a lot of my game is just my natural confidence and manner. Maybe I come off as needy or come on too strong when we get physical. They might sense that I'm seeking sex and become intimidated, shy or something. But shit that shouldn't be a game ender unless it was whining or pleading or rapist type shit. Just trying to get her naked shouldn't be such a turn off. Especially because they seem to like my advances up to that point.

Advice?

 

[NarrowJ]

OD,

I had this same issue. I felt like any resistance meant "stop", but in fact, unless it's hard resistance (such as a complete sit up and pull away) then you're good to keep advancing with her. Soft or token resistance is things like her moaning but pulling her top back down or rolling slightly away from you or misaligning her hips. Girls give soft and/or token resistance because they want you to be dominant and push through it.

As far as sleeping with girls on a first meetup, it's really not that hard and a lot of them (more than you'd think) actually want to. The hardest thing for some guys to realize is that women love sex, probably more than men do. Have you ever seen a woman have an orgasm? I know you have. They go nuts. I get jealous of it sometimes. Case in point

Read about push-pull and you should actually use that while escalating sexually. Kiss her, then pull back. Rub her body and breath on her neck and smell her hair, then pull back. Escalating sexually with a girl (for the first time), should be you touching her and kissing her, pulling back, but each time you touch and kiss her you go a little further. If she gives you soft or token resistance, pull back and try again in a few minutes (building her comfort level, and making her horny in the process). Don't continue to push as she gives resistance. You have to pull back and then try again after a few minutes. You don't want to push when she's showing you discomfort. Pull back, talk to her a little, laugh with her, build more rapport and comfort, and then try again.

Girls will actually get disappointed and go into auto-rejection if they want sex and you don't push through their token resistance to make it happen, which sounds a lot like what you're experiencing. If she's back at your pad, I'm saying there's a 90% chance this is what she wants.

Read some of the articles on push-pull, escalation, and in the case you can't or she's giving hard resistance, then maybe check out some of the articles on date compression or how to get a girlfriend. I'd link them, but I'm on my phone so it's kind of hard to look them up.

Hope that helps a little, man!
NJ

 

[old-dog]

You could be right about me not pushing through.

Turns out last night I closed one of the apparent flakes from 2 weeks ago. She didn't talk to me for 2 weeks by text message.

Then last night before I went out I sent her this message

"Hey, I'm going to be at <bar name> tonight. If I see you there I will know that you're looking for me".

All I got back as a "lol" and I never pushed it.

10:30 she texts me... "I'm here where are you?"

11:15 we're at my house with her ridding the circus elephant.

She shit tested me quite a few times before I could get it in her. I basically had to tell her I was a bad boy and that she was fucking up my game tonight by showing up and that she owed me a piece of ass that I should have gotten weeks ago.
And it wasn't until I literally said: "You keep giving me that attitude and daddy's going to get angry and you won't like that".
Burst of passion and then she was putty... doing exactly that I told her. I was the boss and she loved making me happy.
Every few minutes she was looking for my approval of her skills. It was like tryouts for the Sex Olympics and I'm the "head" coach.
Blonde, 22 big tits and fucks like a porn star.
I'm not going to let this good guy image keep me from pushing and pulling again. Girls like bad boys. Not just good guys who act bad.