FR  Flakey girl - how to react?

determined

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Mar 14, 2013
Messages
172
I know my chances of actually seeing this girl are slim, but I was hoping you guys could help me maximize them.

Met her on the street on a Saturday afternoon. Was immediately enthusiastic about me, and lit up when I asked her out. Fastest yes I've ever gotten. We scheduled for that Monday night. Ice breaker text and she responds excitedly.

Day of I text to confirm and she says she got invited to an interview the following day (she's Korean and needs to find an internship so she can stay in San Francisco for a few more months) and wants to prepare. Can we reschedule? I reply"sure," and we pick Friday. Day of I text to confirm again, and this time she claims she partied too hard the night before because she got the internship, and now she has a terrible hangover and wants to stay in tonight. Apologizes profusely (this text is so long it doesn't fit on my phone screen) and promises that if I don't mind rescheduling she'll "never ever break our plans again." My response: "Haha sure no problem, no need for such a long explanation. Are you free either tomorrow or Monday nights?" We reschedule for Monday.

Day of I text to confirm, and since she's flaked on me twice I tell her we should just hang out at my place:

me 1106: See you tonight HB Korean! Let's hang out at my place, (address) at 8. Text me when you get there :).
me 1540: Hey HB Korean, get my text earlier? 8 o'clock sound good?
me 1738: Hey, haven't heard back so I assume tonight is cancelled. HB Korean, you seem like a cool girl, but I'm not really looking to chase after you.

No response. She was so into me initially - what happened and how do I react?
 

PrettyDecent

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Mar 2, 2013
Messages
876
Hey determined,

Some time last month I was having a girl flake on me (and me flake on her -- don't know if this changes things), and the situation followed pretty similar to your two first flakes. On the third one I called, instead of texted, before the date, so that it would feel like progress was being made. She didn't answer...but she was definitely enthusiastic through her texts after. And we did end up meeting together ;). It makes it feel not so bland for the third time, I suppose.

Anyways, I'd say your "goose is cooked" here, bro...I wouldn't be sure where to proceed from here. But that's alright; more girls for you to see, right? ;)

Jake
 

Smith

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Sep 14, 2013
Messages
1,017
hmm just wondering where did u guys plan to meet up? It's hard to tell how she's feeling when u text her about meeting up at ur place and it could make it seems like ur chasing her if she doesn't want to go to ur place yet.
maybe u could have flirt with her if she was keen on rescheduling and how she now 'owes u' and have to make it up to u.
But hey! if u could get that girl to be keen on meeting u in the first place, u could easily get another one ;)
 

determined

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Mar 14, 2013
Messages
172
Jino, I'd originally asked her out either for drinks or just said "let's meet up sometime," don't remember. The first two times in my confirmation texts I invited her to meet up at Union Square (downtown SF, near both our places, where it's nice to just sit with a girl). The third time I followed Chase's advice to escalate the date and make it more convenient for me. Makes things easier if the girl comes out and weeds out the ones who aren't serious. Guess she must not have been serious.

Determined, I'm probably done, yeah. Just left wondering what changed since we met. Will definitely call the next girl. Maybe I took her for granted after her initial bright reaction and that gave her cold feet.
 
Top
>