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Always go for it at least once, dawg.
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This text exchange is ongoing, advice appreciated.
Met beautiful brazilian (bb) at a club a couple of weeks ago, didn't # close (lights came on 4 min into our convo and I stalled), but then saw her again by chance at the uni cafeteria while waiting in line for food. Said hi and that was it. Last Wed, saw her in the same cafeteria while eating. She was leaning up against a post, waiting for yogurt to be brought (lol) and waved shyly at me. Got number and asked to meet up. She said "Isn't the Super Bowl this Sunday?". Said she was gonna watch the superbowl with friends.
Text exchange:
I invited her the next day because Sunday was a no-go and figured it's good to strike while the iron is hot. What sucks is that I was in the cafeteria late lunch-time today (saturday) and saw her from the back walking away while I was eating. There weren't a lot of people and so the chance is high that she saw me but was embarassed to say hi ? I'm prolly overthinking this, but I can't decide whether I should send a response text (saying something like "No worries, we'll figure something out during the week") or just give it a couple of days until the week begins.
Thanks playas!
Met beautiful brazilian (bb) at a club a couple of weeks ago, didn't # close (lights came on 4 min into our convo and I stalled), but then saw her again by chance at the uni cafeteria while waiting in line for food. Said hi and that was it. Last Wed, saw her in the same cafeteria while eating. She was leaning up against a post, waiting for yogurt to be brought (lol) and waved shyly at me. Got number and asked to meet up. She said "Isn't the Super Bowl this Sunday?". Said she was gonna watch the superbowl with friends.
Text exchange:
I invited her the next day because Sunday was a no-go and figured it's good to strike while the iron is hot. What sucks is that I was in the cafeteria late lunch-time today (saturday) and saw her from the back walking away while I was eating. There weren't a lot of people and so the chance is high that she saw me but was embarassed to say hi ? I'm prolly overthinking this, but I can't decide whether I should send a response text (saying something like "No worries, we'll figure something out during the week") or just give it a couple of days until the week begins.
Thanks playas!
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I think it doesn't look that promising... part of the problem might be not being dominant / direct enough in going for the #... I'm also suspicious of those who do not respond enthusiastically to the icebreaker, as far as I'm concerned it means she's not down (I don't usually text again after the icebreaker unless I get a response, this is just part of my screening process though and I've often wondered what would happen if I didn't play it this way)... and I heard one of the experienced guys explain his process elsewhere on these boards, which is that if she doesn't suggest an alternative time he doesn't text her again until she does... sometimes if they were just playing with you, they'll cave in after a few hours and start to invest.
-Ray
-Ray
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I've also got a bit of a situation on my hands, realize I may have erred by allowing it to turn into a textfest... poor precedent on my part.
Background: She re-approached me in the 7/11 this morning, I had forgotten about her, but vaguely recalled opening her in the same place the previous week when she said "oh you're here again"... I got out some full body touch in moving her aside from the coffee machine and she seemed down cos she waited for me outside the store... came out and put my arm around her and said let's walk together for a bit.
So we talked about this and that, she was investing hardcore and asking me lots of questions, I was playing a pretty straightforward, attainable game with honest responses to her questions (she seemed a bit insecure). She all but suggested a hangout (by bringing up whether I drink and do I enjoy going out) so we set up a hangout for Friday and exchanged numbers. Moved to taken compliance by removing her hood so I could see her hair and complimenting her on it. Gave her a back and shoulder rub(!) to see her through her day at work.
Ejected cos I had to get home to my kids, had left them watching TV while I ducked down the street to get some chocolate for baking (I explained to her that I had to attend a number of events with my children today... see texting below).
So here is the text exchange:
Ideas gents? Aim is to keep her warm until Friday, as she is likely to auto-reject if I'm not attainable enough, so the normal aloof texting protocol is probably not going to work here. I suspect this could go off at any moment, she's clearly very needy and is likely to shit test me in some way in the meantime to get me to invest I'd say.
-Ray
Background: She re-approached me in the 7/11 this morning, I had forgotten about her, but vaguely recalled opening her in the same place the previous week when she said "oh you're here again"... I got out some full body touch in moving her aside from the coffee machine and she seemed down cos she waited for me outside the store... came out and put my arm around her and said let's walk together for a bit.
So we talked about this and that, she was investing hardcore and asking me lots of questions, I was playing a pretty straightforward, attainable game with honest responses to her questions (she seemed a bit insecure). She all but suggested a hangout (by bringing up whether I drink and do I enjoy going out) so we set up a hangout for Friday and exchanged numbers. Moved to taken compliance by removing her hood so I could see her hair and complimenting her on it. Gave her a back and shoulder rub(!) to see her through her day at work.
Ejected cos I had to get home to my kids, had left them watching TV while I ducked down the street to get some chocolate for baking (I explained to her that I had to attend a number of events with my children today... see texting below).
So here is the text exchange:
Argh don't want to get in deeper, will wait till tomorrow and text her back "hey long day, was out all day and fell asleep with the kids..." or something. But it sounds a bit like excusing myself. Hmm what to do, I may have fucked myself over by setting a too-responsive texting precedent, although being fair it was Sunday and she couldn't expect me to keep this up during the working week...09:50 Me: heyyy...coffee making, spring cleaning new friend....
11:33 Her: How's your morning going...
12:33 Me: mmm exchanged the choc chip cookies for various quiches and so on (not that im not a real man hehehe) feeling pretty good. hbu?
12:53 Her: You wanna meet today for drinks ?
13:06 Me: i would really like to, but the only way we could do it is at my place while the kids are sleeping, the drinks are really cheap here
13:15 Her: Yeah right ..I rather go out ....
13:15 Her: We meet on Friday anyway ...
13:54 Me: sure I am looking forward to that. xx
15:19 Her: Tell me abit about yourself, like age, hobbies etc...
15:31 Me: age: old hobbies: being chatted up by 7/11 hotties......
16:08 Her: Yeah I suppose your right... But I always have something interesting to talk about ...... What do you mean you interest me?....
16:26 Her: So you going to tell me?...
17:03 Me: patience my darling......
17:09 Her: What ideas?... I haven't mentioned about anything so far?....
17:14 Her: What are you say I don't understand...
18:01 Her: Are you going to tell me?...
Ideas gents? Aim is to keep her warm until Friday, as she is likely to auto-reject if I'm not attainable enough, so the normal aloof texting protocol is probably not going to work here. I suspect this could go off at any moment, she's clearly very needy and is likely to shit test me in some way in the meantime to get me to invest I'd say.
-Ray
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Things seem to be in slightly better shape today...
-Ray
Now for God's sake don't touch this, if it ain't broke don't fix it07:18 Me: hey hon got a little busy with stuff, we can talk later....
08:03 Her: Yeah I got a short day today at work got things to do hope it goes quick today....You have a nice good day....
-Ray
NarrowJ said:Tammy (older chick, 33, who I've actually known for a while and ran into while I was out Sunday afternoon):
This was yesterday:
Me [1510]: Hey Tammy! Hope I got your # right. If so, this is mine
Her [1728]: Hmmm. If this is NJ and ur trying to reach Tammy then you definitely have the right # lol
Her [1739]: Glad you decided to use it
Me [1755]: Yes it is and yes I am
Her [1803]: Hmmm... well nothing too mischievous, just work & now I'm home trying to decide whether I should do laundry or have some wine, or both. Oh and I also happen to be texting with this smart, funny, attractive and intriguing gentleman so I just might get a bit more mischievous ;-)
Her [1805]: So what are you up to?
Me [1813]: Oh not much. Maybe getting mischievous with you? Haha. I just got home, about make something to eat and then I have to run help a friend move a pool table.
Her [1817]: Sounds like an interesting evening, especially that part about me, lol!
Her [1822]: Making anything good for dinner??? I still can't decide what I'm hungry for...
Me [1824]: Nothing exciting! Couple chicken breasts and snacking on cheese cubes while I wait lol.
Her [1826]: Hmmm... that's funny I was just snacking on some cheese too!
Her [1831]: I'm kinda thinkin I really don't wanna cook tonight!
Her [1831]: ....which is why nothing sounds appetizing, lol!
Me [1834]: Yeah I have eaten two handfuls of mixed nuts and like 8 cheese cubes while this chicken is cooking and now I'm not hungry haha
Me [1834]: so what do you think about getting together soon? Not sure what your schedules like as far as work.
Her [1842]: I would love to get together very soon. My schedule can be a little crazy sometimes, just depends...
Her [1842]: I work Mon-Fri, 730-4, can occasionally do weeknights, but weekends are generally best.
Me [1905]: Right, figured that was the case
Her [1913]: I forgot we talked about that! Haha yeah that sounds like a plan, if you want to do that.
Me [1930]: Yep, sounds good! I'll bring some vino if you want to pick up the ingredients for the pizza?
Her [1933]: Sure!
Me [1940]: Cool, it'll be fun
Her [1943]: It will! * then starts asking me questions about my job and stuff, which really isn't helpful here, so I'll leave all that out*
I would say this one is in the bag lol.
NJ
I know you probably don't remember this interaction, but generally speaking,
Do you think this
"Her [1831]: I'm kinda thinkin I really don't wanna cook tonight!"
Was her giving hints that she wanted you to invite her over for dinner?
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RickLocke said:
Yes, she's all over him. Satisfy the woman, J !
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Eh, You are reading too much into the situations.
First girl in my opinion as probably excited to see you and you played hard to get. Mirror her reactions, shes probably like eh he didn't make time for me whatever, especially if the party ended she might have been thinking either booty call, or you go out a lot and didn't really care about the interaction. Or even, using an example i have bouncing a Mexican concert at a bar, i had this one chick all over me and i had to walk away and work for the night. well some dude pulled her into the v.i.p section and she stopped texting me back. Never heard from her again.
Second girl, she probably just wasn't interested in hanging out with anyone. we all go through it some times, for example right now i am more focused on my own work and starting a business i just don't have the energy for it all the time anymore.
One of the guys i am learning from is very simple. Starts a conversation with some small talk, asks what she is doing if she says she is busy he messages another girl. it doesn't look like chasing. The funny thing is watching him, he does this everywhere. i watched him at the gym ask a girl how she was, and she just talked and talked and talked and talked and talked..... or if he goes to a restaurant to meet a girl up. He ill order a drink and some food. hen he is done with that, he usually ill be like im heading back to my place. You are more than obliged to join me. He never asks more than once and its super powerful, i know here it says sometimes you have to persist because you want it more but i feel now its more of a chasing technique instead of an abundance mentality... when you are more experienced this works wonders. Then again, he does have 10 girls hitting him up all the time minimum he shows me the text messages. Fake it to make it
First girl in my opinion as probably excited to see you and you played hard to get. Mirror her reactions, shes probably like eh he didn't make time for me whatever, especially if the party ended she might have been thinking either booty call, or you go out a lot and didn't really care about the interaction. Or even, using an example i have bouncing a Mexican concert at a bar, i had this one chick all over me and i had to walk away and work for the night. well some dude pulled her into the v.i.p section and she stopped texting me back. Never heard from her again.
Second girl, she probably just wasn't interested in hanging out with anyone. we all go through it some times, for example right now i am more focused on my own work and starting a business i just don't have the energy for it all the time anymore.
One of the guys i am learning from is very simple. Starts a conversation with some small talk, asks what she is doing if she says she is busy he messages another girl. it doesn't look like chasing. The funny thing is watching him, he does this everywhere. i watched him at the gym ask a girl how she was, and she just talked and talked and talked and talked and talked..... or if he goes to a restaurant to meet a girl up. He ill order a drink and some food. hen he is done with that, he usually ill be like im heading back to my place. You are more than obliged to join me. He never asks more than once and its super powerful, i know here it says sometimes you have to persist because you want it more but i feel now its more of a chasing technique instead of an abundance mentality... when you are more experienced this works wonders. Then again, he does have 10 girls hitting him up all the time minimum he shows me the text messages. Fake it to make it
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maximus6004 said:
Sounds like a baller. Would love to meet him.
- Hector
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If anyone is interested in how the date with 7/11 chick went, I wrote it up here:
https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?f=15&t=8232&start=100#p45341
Now to the next text interaction... I sent the following text to a few stale numbers from my phone that I hadn't totally given up on:
https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?f=15&t=8232&start=50#p43275
Maybe I'll wait another couple of weeks and ping her again just for fun. No doubt she'll be pissed as hell by that time.
-Ray
https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?f=15&t=8232&start=100#p45341
Now to the next text interaction... I sent the following text to a few stale numbers from my phone that I hadn't totally given up on:
Days later I get the following response from C1, whose insta-date I have written up here:Tue 10:47 Me: ladies i'm planning on going out to [place] on saturday night and then hosting an after party at my place nearby, from say 1am ish, let me know if you're in (& how many u want to bring). Raymond
https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?f=15&t=8232&start=50#p43275
How did I do? She seems heavily invested, so I probably could have made more of this. I tried not to sound defensive, but the second part might have, a little. Anyway, I think I did manage to throw it back to her, as basically "hang out or fuck off", but without submitting to her frame. So I'm pleased with myself for that.Thu 20:35 C1: Hi Ray, I must say I'm a little disappointed in your game. As soon as I tell you I'm not ready to date - you don't even bother to respond. If you want to get a girl longer term than 5 minutes, try responding... Also, staring a message with 'ladies' is so impersonal and offensive that even if I had intended on going to your party, I wouldn't based on the start of the message alone.
Thu 21:38 Me: Is this C1? Why do you think I'm "gaming" you? Sounds rather the reverse if you were intending to test me by throwing up obstacles... I enjoyed spending time with you, but i don't waste time on useless text convo. So if something has changed since we last spoke then do feel free to enlighten me, otherwise i'll leave you to get on with things
Thu 22:35 C1: Yes, it's C1. Nothing has changed and I don't see why you would other inviting me to a party of you have no interest in being friends, it's contradictory.
Thu 22:37 Me: Oh. Well, if you wanted to hang out on a 1-to-1 basis and not call it dating, that works fine for me. But what I got from your message was that we're mere acquaintances who would only see each other in a general social setting if at all. Hence why i invited you to the party. I didn't intend to be offensive, just practical i suppose.
Thu 22:54 C1: Ok.
Maybe I'll wait another couple of weeks and ping her again just for fun. No doubt she'll be pissed as hell by that time.
-Ray
Yeah, she was pissed off. I agree with her though, I don't like the "ladies" opener. You could have reworded it as a "I'm getting a crew together for drinks at [ ], and house-party after, and you're welcome to come. Let me know if you're in, and if you're bringing anyone else" to the same effect.
I didn't see the convo where you wrote her off, but she implies you just harddropped her, when maybe she wasn't wanting that.
There's no real chance of recovery happening naturally on this one if it's just daygame, so I'd be inclined to text her "So, C1, maybe you're right and I screwed up writing you off when you said you weren't ready to date. Let me buy you a drink at [ ] and we'll chat." Then delete the number if it goes nowhere.
I didn't see the convo where you wrote her off, but she implies you just harddropped her, when maybe she wasn't wanting that.
There's no real chance of recovery happening naturally on this one if it's just daygame, so I'd be inclined to text her "So, C1, maybe you're right and I screwed up writing you off when you said you weren't ready to date. Let me buy you a drink at [ ] and we'll chat." Then delete the number if it goes nowhere.
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Thanks for the feedback. I had just sent basically the same text to a few guy friends prefaced by "gentlemen", which obviously nobody would find offensive, but I agree the text was sloppy (although I suppose I perhaps wanted to communicate laziness)... these women are disposable so I don't have a problem using them for learning purposes. Noted for next time, I like your text a lot better. TBH I don't think I'm gonna supplicate to C1 in that way, I just don't really like her anymore, and I feel it would be rewarding her for getting all schnitzel when she was the one who put the brakes on things -- she can't complain about my taking her at face value.
-Ray
-Ray
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This convo is happening in real-time. Met her yesterday in library:
Advice?
Advice?
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Not enough warmth built up in the interaction to get a direct visit home. It's possible to do this over text, but your texting game has to be top-notch (lots of baiting and matching her investment perfectly).
Wait a few days then invite her to go grab ice cream or coffee. Wouldn't try a direct home-invitation again. Of course, once the date hits a high point, invite her home and fuck her.
Btw, I actually liked your redirect when she said she doesn't know you; very fun and playful. Unfortunately, on't think it would be possible to defuse that barrier over text; it has to be done in person. If it was possible to salvage it with this girl over text, it would again require some kickass texting game (basically submitting to her shit-test a bit, revealing some info about yourself over text, getting some rapport from her, and then having her accept your invitation of her own accord; done it before, but it's tricky stuff. When your game hits really high levels, you'll never really encounter stuff like this too much and can go for direct invites over).
Where you're at right now, just focus on getting to the date; don't try to get her home that quickly just yet. But hey, I'm a guy who never took it slow and tried really advanced shit when I was a noobie, so take that as you may.
- Hector
Wait a few days then invite her to go grab ice cream or coffee. Wouldn't try a direct home-invitation again. Of course, once the date hits a high point, invite her home and fuck her.
Btw, I actually liked your redirect when she said she doesn't know you; very fun and playful. Unfortunately, on't think it would be possible to defuse that barrier over text; it has to be done in person. If it was possible to salvage it with this girl over text, it would again require some kickass texting game (basically submitting to her shit-test a bit, revealing some info about yourself over text, getting some rapport from her, and then having her accept your invitation of her own accord; done it before, but it's tricky stuff. When your game hits really high levels, you'll never really encounter stuff like this too much and can go for direct invites over).
Where you're at right now, just focus on getting to the date; don't try to get her home that quickly just yet. But hey, I'm a guy who never took it slow and tried really advanced shit when I was a noobie, so take that as you may.
- Hector
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Hector, thanks for analyzing the situation!
Yea, I knew I didn't establish enough rapport with her - I fumbled yesterday by letting her ignore my invitation to meet up on Friday (otherwise she was pretty bubbly). But, I figured it would be a good experiment to see how she would react to the study date invite. Good reference point.
Yea, I knew I didn't establish enough rapport with her - I fumbled yesterday by letting her ignore my invitation to meet up on Friday (otherwise she was pretty bubbly). But, I figured it would be a good experiment to see how she would react to the study date invite. Good reference point.
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No problem, homie.
Great way to look at things Keep it up (your dick and your progress...but mostly your dick)
- Hector
Great way to look at things
Keep it up (your dick and your progress...but mostly your dick) - Hector
Hey guys I got a question bout this. Met this girl while at work, hit it off very sexual body language. Genuinly seemed interested pretty sure I fudged up at the end or somewhere in the middle. Heres the texting.
I texted her the next day because we spoke about the vacation so i thought i'd set up something now for when she gets back, perhaps I should of waited. In this situation I don't know how to respond cause I've had this happen before and nothing turns out, I just think shes not interested anymore or is playing some kind of game.
I'm either going to A. Not respond B. Say" Forgot about me already, oh well C. Say "lol read up"
What you guys think?
Me:Cool meeting you Nattalia
-Raqimus
Her:Same
[Next Day]
Me: Hey Natalia! Thinking we need to get together some time soon. Whats your schedule like next week?
Her:Whose this again? And am going to be out in vacation
I texted her the next day because we spoke about the vacation so i thought i'd set up something now for when she gets back, perhaps I should of waited. In this situation I don't know how to respond cause I've had this happen before and nothing turns out, I just think shes not interested anymore or is playing some kind of game.
I'm either going to A. Not respond B. Say" Forgot about me already, oh well C. Say "lol read up"
What you guys think?
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Don't respond to her. Next.
- Hector
- Hector
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Raqimus,
You have your name tagged at the end of the second to last text you sent her, and she asked "who's this again?"
She's either a total "derp," or she isn't interested, or both.
Next.
- Franco
Me:Cool meeting you Nattalia
Her:Same
Me: Hey Natalia! Thinking we need to get together some time soon. Whats your schedule like next week?
Her:Whose this again? And am going to be out in vacation
You have your name tagged at the end of the second to last text you sent her, and she asked "who's this again?"
She's either a total "derp," or she isn't interested, or both.
Next.
- Franco