FR+ Freezing Our Asses of and Meeting a Redhead at NYE

[lingua]

The most important things happen after the "the main flag".

I met a new Indian guy who was a friend of one of my wings. He seems to be pretty chill, has a big place by the center of the city and he's the closest person to a natural that I've found yet. So we went out on NYE to the main square by the bar street, look around for a midnight kiss. We mostly got rejections and weird looks but we continued on warming up, one thing I noticed was that a higher percentage of girls seemed to linger around and thus I had more opportunity to hook them since I had a haircut that noon. I mostly followed Chase's email about hairstyles and many hours on Reddit and Pinterest to find a style suited to my face and hair type.

The main part of the night was when my friend opened a set of girls in the middle of the street, as they were watching the hundreds of fireworks that everyone was setting off. I went up to him, saw that one of the girls had great body language, we locked eyes and then I grabbed her by her waist and pulled her towards me. I asked her how her night was going, and we talked about some random stuff. I really liked the high energy cute vibe that she gave and told her that, leaned in closer and gave her a kiss. We danced a bit and she asked for my number (a good sign of investment I thought) so I called my number from her phone and found out that they were going to a big party by the other side of the city, and tickets were required so we let these girls go and have fun for the night. Also, before she left she was bold/tipsy enough to take my hand and place it on her butt, then asking me if I was an ass man or a boobs man as she was gigling; it was pretty refreshing to interact with a girl who wasn't too reserved/self-conscious like the many I had seen in this city. My friend and I approached around 10 more girls in one of the new clubs that opened. Nothing noteworthy happened in many of them, though we had a lot of fun testing our boundaries by teasing girls who would never open up or even smile, sometimes we would partner up with the girl's friend herself. One primary school teacher was pretty much asking for me to kiss her in a club, but she wasn't exceptionally cute, her boyfriend was next to her and there was a cuter redhead on my right side that was "casually" grinding her ass on my arm/leg. I was too hesitant to open that redhead and another guy opened her in front of me, so I was quite bummed at the moment. That redhead's fat friend came up and started talking to me, so I talked to her for a bit before inviting my friend over to the conversation (he sometimes likes heavy girls). We didn't stay up too much because it was too cold to stand outside and we had enough fun in the clubs so we headed home soon after that.

The bold girl I met in the street had sent me an icebreaker first:

Her: Hi pretty! Have a good time! X
Me: Glad to meet you detective girl (I like to roleplay and use callback humor)
-Lingua
Her: Glad to meet you too handsome!

These were exchanged around 3 or 4 in the morning, so I was pretty happy with the response but I also wanted to find out if these heightened feelings of hers would last when she sobered up next day.

Anyways I set up a casual date with her in the center of the city the next day. Since she lives in an another city close by she wanted to also bring her friend in a sort of double date, I figured it was alright as she was driving here at night and we hadn't had a long interaction so there was no chance to build trust and too much of a connection.

When she arrived I gave my girl a kiss and then I met her friend. We got along quite well with the friend since we spoke the same foreign language and then I proceeded to focus on my girl.

I took them to a cozy pub which has nice music and two leather couches that are at the back of the place. Then we ordered some drinks, but of course, she couldn't drink since she had to drive and I thought about her staying over and asserting the conversation that way, but her friend was also depending on her to take her back as the friend had lied to her mom about "studying" since the other girl wasn't allowed to go out too much, it's quite common with conservative families back in my country too.

>>>THE MAIN FLAG, was my girl suddenly asking me (a quite retarded question tbh) if I would make my 'future wife wear a headscarf' just after I had told her that I had no religious beliefs and that I was raised in a religious environment. This seemed to stick out from the rest of her conversation, as she didn't seem to be too inexperienced or conservative. But I was on heightened alert to not stand out as a boyfriend candidate. As time passed, she also asked how long I was going to study here and I told her that I wasn't too sure and that I might go back to the states after graduating or that I might start working here. It's quite funny to see how blatant she's testing me on my stability. I cut off some topics that were boring us, and made her talk about her dreams and her goals. She had mentioned her visits to Africa before so now she talked about her experiences there and how she wants to work in order to help those in need. (The other day when we first met when she mentioned she went to Africa so I quickly but casually said, "I bet you've also uploaded a picture of yourself holding a few black kids from a village on your Facebook profile", and later when I checked her profile I was spot on The Onion article on that came to my mind)

I mean, it was nice that she wasn't afraid to travel and discover things, and I could sense her energy and her positive vibe but a couple of things she said that night caught me offguard, like her hypothetical wife scenario. I understand the tests for boyfriend, I think every girl does that. One thing I wanted to use was, "if it weren't for X, I'd do" (this is fun to do), so as we were kissing I said that if it weren't for her friend that I'd grab her and take her back to my house. I kept her guessing and used a sexy purr so it didn't sound as lame as it does now in text Well, after that she said "Oh yeah, well I'm not the type of girl that goes home with a guy after one day", so I gave a quiet chuckle at that and told her that I didn't judge or label girls as those who do certain things or have fun or those that don't. And gave her another long kiss before the situation she became too defensive and the situation turned sour. But at one point I could see that she got a bit self conscious when a couple of people walked by us as we were making out. I take actions more seriously than words, and I could see that she wasn't too experienced and still had a bit of shyness in terms of sexuality, unless she's really good at faking body language and expression. I used deep dive got her to open up more, we had our drinks and we kissed again and then she said "Do you want to know a secret?" , "Sure" I said, "I don't sleep with guys I'm not boyfriends with, I fall in love too easily". I gave her a smile as if I knew that there was the hot sexual beast inside of her waiting to be released, but I didn't say anything, and she was really teased at trying to figure out what I was thinking. By the way she mentioned that she had read the 50 Shades of Grey and said she loved it, so I immediately remembered how obedient she was when I told her things previously in the bar, like even in jokes when I told her to act like a kitten or whatever. At one point she said with a smirk "Stop reading me!" because I was putting the pieces together while making her horny.

Yesterday before we split I set the foundation for getting something to eat for today so she said "tell me the time and place and I'll be there", and then I kissed her goodbye. Her text that night was "Good night Mr Grey".

Now I realized I never explicitly mentioned that I was going to cook for us, and I told her to meet me in about 2 hours from now. Since she's investing by driving over her two days in a row and always being the prompt one in texts (used for logistics, not making the mistake of long texting again), I'm pretty sure she won't object to eating at my place, since I'm not going to say "let's head back to my place", rather "I know of a good place, it's as close to homemade as possible " or something along that line. But I'm afraid she's going to pull out a "are we going to be exclusive/I don't want to be connected to you if this isn't serious" when I escalate back at my place. If the situation comes up I'm currently thinking of using the paragraph from the article "Where do you see this going?". I don't know with complete certainty how experienced she is, based on my knowledge of her, and the first night we met even while tipsy I asked her if she likes to party (trying my best to say in a neutral/slightly positive tone) she said that she wasn't and that she would keep her friends from going out, on one hand her hesitation and body language confirms this claim of inexperience and on the other, she was very bold and confident in NYE. So I'm getting conflicting information and I'd like to:
1. not fuck up tonight's date
2. enjoy each other
3. not give her fake promises or hurt her
4. not be stuffed into a relationship from her frame

Any comments or advice, especially speedy ones would be grand

 

[Explosive Results]

>>>THE MAIN FLAG, was my girl suddenly asking me if I would make my 'future wife wear a headscarf' [...] I was on heightened alert to not stand out as a boyfriend candidate.

You should have told her you'd prefer your future wife not to wear anything at all! =D

 

[lingua]

You should have told her you'd prefer your future wife not to wear anything at all! =D

Damn that's a good one

Well yesterday we came back to my place and I made us some dinner. Even as she entered my apartment's main door she said "Promise me to stay away from my pants!" multiple times while smiling at me, I didn't reply to any one of those remarks and changed the subject. While we were waiting for the food to bake, she went around my room checking my books and notes (I had put my "secrets of a sexpert" by my bed earlier, which she 'stumbled upon') so she seemed to be satisfying her curiosity. She looked at some photos of my family and after seeing a couple of pictures of my brother she asked me "Do you like kids?" If I'm not mistaken, this girl is a perfect example of someone who still equates love and sex, and she's constantly testing for boyfriend qualities.

Anyways, after we're done eating we lay on my bed while watching TV and we start making out. A bit of teasing here and there and I'm rock hard so I start to undress her. Everything was fine and I was caressing her boobs but then I encountered massive LMR when I went for the pants. I casually changed the focus on her breasts and her neck, then attempted it again without success. This time, she got a bit emotional so I layed next to her and held her in my arms. She said "Do you want to know the truth?" I said "Of course", "Last time I had sex was 2 years ago (she knew the exact date), and I've had one long term boyfriend. When I have sex with someone, I fall in love with them. And since I've been getting to know you so much these 2 days, I know what's going to happen if we have sex, and I'm going to cry and try to forget you the next 5 months since you won't ever fall in love with me as hard as I will for you". I also liked the way she did her reasoning, she and I have quiet a common interest in nonfiction literature: "If we had sex on NYE it would have been fine, but now I know too much about you... yeah, I think I've figured it out, I can do one night stands if I don't know anything about a guy".

Of course I wasn't silently listening her the whole time, I questioned her on her conviction that things were going to turn on the way she thought they would. And how self-fulfilling prophecies work. I told her to enjoy the moment, and that it's an exhilarating experience to have sex with a person you connect with after a short time. She told me about her past experiences and her friends teasing her for being a nun and not frequently having sex or getting a boyfriend. She also mentioned having experienced rape one time. I thanked her for her honesty and then we slowly went back to cuddling. Some random conversation turned up, and Paris was mentioned so she said "I'd have sex with you if we went there, it'd be so romantic" I didn't say anything in particular to that, then I told her about my situation and how I'd been traveling my whole life and that I didn't know what the future would hold. The article on promises was very helpful and quite applicable to my lifestyle, so I said to her I could only promise to be honest with her and that I'd make sure to take care of her and spend time with her as long as she did as the same. This softened her up a bit, and she seemed to be out her emotional state. It was around midnight when she said she better got going, so I warmly said "You can stay over if you want". She did a quick mental check about her pets and arrangements with her parents then decided to stay

I gave her one of my tshirts and she hopped on to the bed with her panties on, my eyes were fixated on her body. We spooned for some quiet some time and I would get cycles of erections and she would tease me with her butt then we'd fall asleep for another hour or so. At one point I started dry humping her and things got heated, we started to kiss and then I undressed her. I was really hard at that moment, and just after I'd put on the condom I was soft(I still had a bit of anxiety from the last girl with whom the same thing happened when I was going to enter her). She asked me if something was wrong with her but I assured her that it was just stress and anxiety. I made sure she came with oral and fingering and then we went to sleep again. I felt like ripping my dick off at one point I would get random erections in class or while studying, or even with that Chinese girl I didn't particularly find attractive but here was this girl I had a connection with and found really attractive ready to receive me, and I was limp.

A couple of things to notice was that while I was dealing with the LMR while she had her pants on was that we were dry humping then too, and started to stroke my cock from outside of my pants, but that caused too much friction and the same thing happened with the last girl when we didn't use any lube in her handjob, I had to deal with chafing and insensitive frenulum for a week (I've now ordered lube with carrageenan extract). And I was ready to have sex at least two instances before we went to bed and while she still had doubts, so my mind was in game mode and I was a bit mentally exhausted after finally overcoming resistance to sex.

In the morning, she asked me if I'd accompany her to her car and without thinking too much I looked outside the window and said in a not too serious tone "There's no snow or rain and it's not dark outside, I mean I'd never let you leave alone in midnight but I think you can walk yourself". She became really emotional to this and started saying "this is why I never go out and have sex with random guys, they use you and let you walk away ..." While trying to not supplicate I think I overlooked two things, one of them was to be a bit more warm right after sex and the other was to be more cautious than normal on certain topics with this girl since she's inexperienced. In short I managed to stop the drama, made sure she was calm and communicating clearly what she felt. I told her it was no big deal for me to walk with her, and that if it was important to her then we'd do it. I reminded her that we were on the same team and there was no need for drama/guilt tripping "Oh you shouldn't come just because I want you to!/It doesn't even matter if you come now". I guess I did an okay job at preventing from capitulating to her and showing her that emotional outbursts are not the way to communicate.

She was pretty surprised at seeing her hickeys that morning and I remember her friend saying that it was uncommon for her to party like that when we met in NYE, so everything so far including her own accounts of her past, points out that to her having a low partner count and experience. Currently I don't think I have a healthy mindset of relationships in general thinking that they prevent you from learning or growing in game, and I haven't had a true long term relationship as well. I'm planning on taking another girl out to coffee next week, but I'm quite sure this main girl is going to want to become exclusive in the not too distant future. Now I'm considering the possibility of getting into a relationship and reading articles on that, because now that I think about it, I've never had to practice or learn anything about that part of game. Having a complex about exclusive relationships and thinking that they're bad because they prevent you from having sex with a different girl every week, obviously shouldn't be something compatible with a positive growth mindset and experiencing a fulfilling relationship would might be a cure for that.