Getting Back into the Game

PrettyDecent

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Mar 2, 2013
Messages
876
Hey fellas,

The majority of people downgrade in their seductive skills after a break. Some people pick up right where they left off, but this has never happened to me. So if you're one of those peeps who have a hard time getting back into the game after a break...this will be of interest to you.

Now, this is the process that's happened to me several times:

1. Excited to get back into the game, thinking it'll be easy to pickup and just start where you left off. You also have ideas for learning strategies that will advance you quicker.
2. You do pickup like you did before, and temporarily you're almost as good before. You might get laid once or twice pretty quickly.
3. As the number of girls that you approach start to increase, your skills actually decrease rapidly, and you're left to start rebuilding all the lost skill.
4. Lengthy period of self-doubt and failure while trying to learn the basics again. A solid skill set is starting to be built back up again (anxiety mostly fades away, conversational skills increase, and you start regaining sexual and social charisma)
5. An explosive breakthrough moment where you've reached the highest peak of skill you've ever reached
6. Starting to feel content with the progress made, your focus starts to avert to other areas in life you may have neglected while grinding (including relaxation, or money-making, or getting into a relationship, or what have you).

And the cycle repeats.

It's never talked about on here, but while pickup is a skill-set that you build...you ultimately have to build it up again later. Except that every time you go back into it, that lengthy period of failure gets shorter and shorter, and you're able to reach a higher level of success than you ever reached.

So, if you're like me and eat serious donkey doodoo when you get back into the game...just keep pushing. You're on the path to unparalleled success.

Nick

P.S. The reason I believe this cycle occurs is this: before you get back into the game, you have a certain level of abundance. Your first day or week in pickup, you keep this mentality and get laid from it. But in order to be serious about improving, like approaching girls 4 or 5 times a week, you need to lose your abundance mentality. So your skill takes the damage. Anxiety increases, your conversation is shit, you have little sexual energy.

But once you build it back up, all the advantages of your old game come back and mix with all the new lessons you are receiving, so you're game reaches a level you've never seen before. But the grinding becomes tiring after a while, and you wish to temporarily retire and restore your energy...and that's how the cycle repeats itself.
 

Rookie

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Sep 7, 2014
Messages
57
Location
London, UK
Hey PrettyDecent,

Man this has helped me so much. I've noticed the exact same trend in me as well. You get better and better after each cycle. I've recently had the longest break from seduction, around a 6 month break and virtually all my skills are gone. Personally the thing I think that sucks the most yet is the most important step is accepting you've downgraded. Because before you do that your going to be "tricking" yourself into thinking that nothing is wrong with you and there is only one small thing is missing in order for you be back as you were. And struggling with things you used to find easy always feels shitty.

Anyway guess I've got a lot of re-learning to do, wish me luck

-Rookie
 

PrettyDecent

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Mar 2, 2013
Messages
876
Glad this post helped you out, Rookie.

Rookie said:
Because before you do that your going to be "tricking" yourself into thinking that nothing is wrong with you and there is only one small thing is missing in order for you be back as you were. And struggling with things you used to find easy always feels shitty.

Said it better than I did! Yep. You'll start killing it in a few months if you just keep your nose to the grindstone.

Nick
 

Hue

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Sep 21, 2016
Messages
1,403
Pretty Decent,

This is accurate as hell, thanks for posting. You as well Rookie, I caught myself in the act of self deception only a few weeks ago.

One thing that I've noticed to be occurring with my game from stages 4-6 is I'll build up tons of momentum, have that explosive breakthrough moment, and do something riskier with my peak of confidence to be met with failure (most recently I was directly sexual with a bartender and got kicked out the club, was not the move).
After that failure I'll begin lowering down the regression again, just not as low as before. As you just put, this is part of the cycle.

I understand getting better means one has to continuously experiment and cut their teeth (no pain no gain).
That said, do you have any suggestions to run this cycle in an efficient manner, or are all subject to the ups and downs of improvement in a way similar to this?

Hueman
 

PrettyDecent

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Mar 2, 2013
Messages
876
Hueman,

Hueman said:
One thing that I've noticed to be occurring with my game from stages 4-6 is I'll build up tons of momentum, have that explosive breakthrough moment, and do something riskier with my peak of confidence to be met with failure (most recently I was directly sexual with a bartender and got kicked out the club, was not the move).

Interesting. That is a side effect of the cycle I hadn't thought of, but is true.

That was pretty ballsy man! I remember one time I got pretty ballsy in a social circle I hadn't been apart of before, and then just got torn up from it. Lol.

Hueman said:
That said, do you have any suggestions to run this cycle in an efficient manner, or are all subject to the ups and downs of improvement in a way similar to this?

Yeah, I do. It's something I've put thought into lately, and I might expand more on it in an article or post on the forum.

Basically, when something shitty happens to you, it affects your confidence. Confidence and momentum are interchangeable terms here.

Breakups can be one way of affecting your momentum (confidence), getting thrown out of a club another. Maybe being called a "creep".

When any of these confidence breaking things happen to you, first figure out why it happened and change your strategy because something is wrong.

The second thing, is you need to start getting "wins". Like, getting laid with a new girl. If you're more advanced, getting laid with, say, 3 new girls in two weeks.

What this does is raises your confidence and momentum. Benefits of momentum include a higher sex drive, smoother escalations, sexier mannerisms, etc. This is all unconscious by the way.

To get wins in quick succession, you need to lower the difficulty you're used to. For example, instead of only using direct daygame for lays, you might lower your standards for girls you're approaching and also start using Tinder. If there's a club or street that always seems to get you laid, go there.

What's important is immediately after you've gotten that momentum, raise the difficulty again. Get back into direct daygame, or onto new streets that aren't as easy but has higher quality.

Any questions or comments? :)

Nick
 

Hue

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Sep 21, 2016
Messages
1,403
Nick,

I remember one time I got pretty ballsy in a social circle I hadn't been apart of before, and then just got torn up from it. Lol.

Yea been there too haha. Definitely some boundaries especially if you're a newer face.

To get wins in quick succession, you need to lower the difficulty you're used to. For example, instead of only using direct daygame for lays, you might lower your standards for girls you're approaching and also start using Tinder. If there's a club or street that always seems to get you laid, go there.

Word. I've gone back to my old school before and seen this correlation, too.
Lower standards/difficulty --> more results --> more confidence --> better results.

What's important is immediately after you've gotten that momentum, raise the difficulty again. Get back into direct daygame, or onto new streets that aren't as easy but has higher quality. Any questions or comments? :)

I'll definitely be employing this next time shit starts clicking.

Thanks for the insight bruddah.

Hueman
 

PrettyDecent

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Mar 2, 2013
Messages
876
As an update to this thread -

Right now, I believe that a functioning seduction system ought to bring in results within a week (moreso, within a day actually). So the problem here is a faulty system.

My problem was inner game, personally. I had good outer game, but that was overshadowed by low self-esteem and bad belief systems about pickup.

So just remember, look at your both your inner AND outer game when diagnosing issues.

Nick
 

Greco

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Aug 31, 2017
Messages
19
Great pattern recognition Nick. I'll keep it in mind.

I'd like to add something that Chase has written in an article. It's about breakthrough girlfriends. If you reach a new level of seduction skills and land a girl from group that was always out of reach for you, you should try to repeat it instead of getting too quickly in a relationship with that kind of girl. Otherwise you risk not cementing it and maybe forgetting it, and starting all over again or maybe worse. Damn..!

-John
 
Top