Girl Adding Me on Facebook?

[Gamecrasher]

So, I started talking to this girl today and did the usual screening and qualifying, and in the end, she was really nice and upbeat (my kind of girl). She ended up hugging me and asking if she could add me on Facebook, which she did right away.

Did I just get pushed to the friend zone or boyfriend material just like that?

 

[trashKENNUT]

Did I just get pushed to the friend zone or boyfriend material just like that?

Likely, the best way is getting her number also. I think you might need slightly more sexual vibe. the hugging part sounds friendly. There wasn't enough sexual or nervous tension. Otherwise if you did well, just get her out and speed up the sexual vibe.

Zac

 

[Gamecrasher]

Did I just get pushed to the friend zone or boyfriend material just like that?

Likely, the best way is getting her number also. I think you might need slightly more sexual vibe. the hugging part sounds friendly. There wasn't enough sexual or nervous tension. Otherwise if you did well, just get her out and speed up the sexual vibe.

Zac

Yeah, I should have done that. Next time I see her it'll happen. I'm trying to break her out of auto-pilot because she's always friendly to everybody

 

[Gamecrasher]

And she just posted on my wall saying, "SO glad to have met you today! I hope we run into each other again soon!"

 

[Thinkingenigma]

You're not in the friendzone just yet. Play your cards wrong and you definitely could be, but I know a lot of girls who friend everyone immediately after meeting them, so it's not necessarily a bad sign. Just set up another meet, move fast, and see what happens.

 

[Gamecrasher]

You're not in the friendzone just yet. Play your cards wrong and you definitely could be, but I know a lot of girls who friend everyone immediately after meeting them, so it's not necessarily a bad sign. Just set up another meet, move fast, and see what happens.

So going out with her next weekend. I'll try to move super fast

 

[Little Jester]

Looks like some comments around GC about Facebook make people believe befriending a girl on Facebook automatically means 'friends zone'.

Ok I agree Facebook is the devil, but it's not programmed to automatically kill all your progress with a girl.
You can learn the difference between wasting your time on Facebook and using it sparingly, but effectively to your advantage.

A girl adding you on Facebook doesn't mean a thing, other than that she's at least interested in connecting with you (which is a good thing). What kind of a connection is beyond that.

 

[Gamecrasher]

Looks like some comments around GC about Facebook make people believe befriending a girl on Facebook automatically means 'friends zone'.

Ok I agree Facebook is the devil, but it's not programmed to automatically kill all your progress with a girl.
You can learn the difference between wasting your time on Facebook and using it sparingly, but effectively to your advantage.

A girl adding you on Facebook doesn't mean a thing, other than that she's at least interested in connecting with you (which is a good thing). What kind of a connection is beyond that.

I feel that it won't get intimate quickly through Facebook. I don't mind if a girl likes to take it slow, but I just think it's easier if I just keep it mysterious without Facebook.

 

[Garrett]

Gamecrasher,

If a girl adds you on facebook, it doesn't necessarily translate to or even mean interest. People add each other on facebook all the time, I'm sure you have some girls on facebook who you have no sexual interest in, but maybe you wanted to be friends with them, or you were working on a project or something. You do, however, need to make something happen as soon as possible or else you will probably get friend-zoned. I don't know how you framed your initial interaction, but I don't think you need to give up this early! Mind you, a good first impression works wonders. When I was transitioning to a genuine guy, I became an ass hole, and this girl I'm trying to build a friendship with keeps challenging me on everything. All of this wouldn't have happened had I have been genuine from the start. In order to become genuine; however, you have to become an ass first, but be careful because if you become an ass to everyone, you may lose friendships and have some work at hand if you want to win those people back. I agree with what Chase says, being that burning bridges is bad business. Even if you drift off from people, it's good to break off on mutual terms, like the reason that the two of you aren't communicating anymore is because you suddenly got really busy. Anyways I just want you to know that first impressions are quite important and oftentimes, how you present yourself initially will be how you will be perceived by a person. It can be changed over time I believe, but it's a slog especially if you were an ass hole to someone...

What you need to do is use facebook to get the girl out as soon as possible. Chase has articles devoted solely to texting so just read up on a few posts then send her a message. Then, you'll want to try to build a strong connection with her and lead her to intimacy. If you don't know the girl well, build a little rapport then get her to comply by agreeing to meet up with you for coffee or something. This takes practice, but you might as well take advantage of this opportunity. Try not to think too much about the girl, there's millions of them out there so if this one blows, you've got so many others out there who are probably better anyway. Just make things like it's no big deal, move things forward fast, and you're golden!

Cheers,
Garrett

 

[trashKENNUT]

Why You Should Not Have Facebook, or at least use it for dating that much.

1) It's not a dating site.
2) Women receive tons of messages, (the more beautiful you are, the more retarded the list of messages she gets)
3) Chances of her responding to your message, 1/5 depending on how good looking you are.
4) She's logging in to check in on people sending her jobs for model portfolio.
5) She don't log in to see YOU!
6) She logs in to see and participate model, dance, sing competition. ASKING FOR VOTES TOO!
7) You have to wait for her answer, to a date.
8) Needs a better and better photograph to compete and compete endlessly.
9) Her friends might reply your MESSAGE!
10) She might not be so beautiful real life.

and why you should use Facebook lesser.

1) You are a great guy, You share your comments, likes and passion, photos with people personally.
2) You have more to acccomplish in life, and fulfill your passion.
3) Nobody gives much thoughts about you, unless it's your BIRTHDAY. XD
4) You care about your friends more to contact them personally.
5) More beautiful women on the streets, and meet them in PERSON!
6) Less likely for friends to know via mutual friends you dating someone.
7) Get to do more fun things out in the world.
8) It's not efficient, or effective, unless you a cool dancer, or kid in school, or socialite that is well known. (then maybe yes, use it wholeheartedly)
9) Even Superstars like BIGBANG don't use Facebook much, You are a Superstar in your own right, don't use it too often.
10) I said so. XD (Hehe, kk)


Zac

 

[Garrett]

Why You Should Not Have Facebook, or at least use it for dating that much.

1) It's not a dating site.
2) Women receive tons of messages, (the more beautiful you are, the more retarded the list of messages she gets)
3) Chances of her responding to your message, 1/5 depending on how good looking you are.
4) She's logging in to check in on people sending her jobs for model portfolio.
5) She don't log in to see YOU!
6) She logs in to see and participate model, dance, sing competition. ASKING FOR VOTES TOO!
7) You have to wait for her answer, to a date.
8) Needs a better and better photograph to compete and compete endlessly.
9) Her friends might reply your MESSAGE!
10) She might not be so beautiful real life.
11) It's a waste of time
12) It's more attractive if you don't have it (you're different/peacocking in a way)
13) It's mentally exhausting/energy depleting; energy that can be used to pickup hot girls on the street for example
14) Half the people on it are probably not your real friends
15) It's all about popularity/status (Ex: number of friends = perceived value)
16) You are potentially chasing emotions from people who don't care about you
17) It can become addicting
18) Divided attention can lead to lack of productivity/results in goals/aspirations
19) Developing a killer profile is incomparable to developing a killer personality
20) Adds to the mystery/intrigue when people search for you but can't dig up any 'dirt'

 

[Gamecrasher]

Gamecrasher,

If a girl adds you on facebook, it doesn't necessarily translate to or even mean interest. People add each other on facebook all the time, I'm sure you have some girls on facebook who you have no sexual interest in, but maybe you wanted to be friends with them, or you were working on a project or something. You do, however, need to make something happen as soon as possible or else you will probably get friend-zoned. I don't know how you framed your initial interaction, but I don't think you need to give up this early! Mind you, a good first impression works wonders. When I was transitioning to a genuine guy, I became an ass hole, and this girl I'm trying to build a friendship with keeps challenging me on everything. All of this wouldn't have happened had I have been genuine from the start. In order to become genuine; however, you have to become an ass first, but be careful because if you become an ass to everyone, you may lose friendships and have some work at hand if you want to win those people back. I agree with what Chase says, being that burning bridges is bad business. Even if you drift off from people, it's good to break off on mutual terms, like the reason that the two of you aren't communicating anymore is because you suddenly got really busy. Anyways I just want you to know that first impressions are quite important and oftentimes, how you present yourself initially will be how you will be perceived by a person. It can be changed over time I believe, but it's a slog especially if you were an ass hole to someone...

What you need to do is use facebook to get the girl out as soon as possible. Chase has articles devoted solely to texting so just read up on a few posts then send her a message. Then, you'll want to try to build a strong connection with her and lead her to intimacy. If you don't know the girl well, build a little rapport then get her to comply by agreeing to meet up with you for coffee or something. This takes practice, but you might as well take advantage of this opportunity. Try not to think too much about the girl, there's millions of them out there so if this one blows, you've got so many others out there who are probably better anyway. Just make things like it's no big deal, move things forward fast, and you're golden!

Cheers,
Garrett

Thanks Garrett. I already planned things out with her. I asked her this weekend, but she said "next weekend for sure!" She's busy this weekend, but next weekend, we'll be going out. I'll do the informational date with her

 

[Gamecrasher]

So I managed to set up a date with the girl through Facebook, but she canceled on me last minute with: "I can't make it today because of a volunteer thing, but we'll figure something else out!"

So I told her that it was cool and I understand that she's busy, and we could find some other time, but she didn't respond to that.

So 2 days later, I sent her this: "Hey (*Girl's name*)! How are you? I hope you aren't too busy, but if you are, it's totally understandable : ) I'll leave the ball in your court -- let me know when your schedule clears up a bit and you can do lunch/dinner, etc. Hope we hang soon!"

No response in 4 days...

Should I forget about her? And what if I happen to see her walking by?

 

[Garrett]

If I were you I would try one last time. If she doesn't respond, then drop it. If a girl likes you, she's going to respond to your messages. She's busy like you said so you don't have to give up JUST yet. Send her another message using the texting templates on the GC site, and if she doesn't respond, forget it. In the mean time, meet up with other girls, set up an online profile on a dating site if you want, just start meeting more girls, getting numbers, and setting up dates.

If you see her in person, just act like nothing happened and be friendly. You don't have to say/do much, but if you value her friendship or even want to approach her in person to get her out you can try that. I would only do that if I was almost over her/didn't feel much emotion towards her. Meet other girls and within 6 months if you still want to try, send her another message/meet in person .

Cheers,
Garrett

 

[Reaper]

I feel that it won't get intimate quickly through Facebook. I don't mind if a girl likes to take it slow, but I just think it's easier if I just keep it mysterious without Facebook.

The thing about fb is that its tricky because you may see her connected and wanna talk to her a lot, its ok if you say hi to her and maybe chat a little but try to keep things out of the routine, like asking her about the job or school, also don't talk to her very often and try to set up dates when chatting.

Hope this helps you

-Alex

 

[trashKENNUT]

So I managed to set up a date with the girl through Facebook, but she canceled on me last minute with: "I can't make it today because of a volunteer thing, but we'll figure something else out!"

So I told her that it was cool and I understand that she's busy, and we could find some other time, but she didn't respond to that.

So 2 days later, I sent her this: "Hey (*Girl's name*)! How are you? I hope you aren't too busy, but if you are, it's totally understandable : ) I'll leave the ball in your court -- let me know when your schedule clears up a bit and you can do lunch/dinner, etc. Hope we hang soon!"

No response in 4 days...

Should I forget about her? And what if I happen to see her walking by?

She can't make it possibly. and she mention we figure something out. She cancelled on you last minute but she didn't gave a response after 4 days. She could have possibly meet some hotter guys in the volunteer thing regardless it was true or not.

Apply social pressure on her next time she flakes out, texting her asking "Hey <insert name>, we were to suppose to meet the other day and the volunteer thing came out. What happen? i hope nothing's wrong"

Here you not blaming her directly but rather the event she had to go, usually you get her to reply back the text. Otherwise, she's gone.

Zac

 

[Gamecrasher]

I see where you guys are coming from, but I just don't want to make it seem that I'm annoying. I already sent 2 messages that she hasn't responded to. I'm not sure a 3rd one in a row is the way to go..

 

[diegoC]

I see where you guys are coming from, but I just don't want to make it seem that I'm annoying. I already sent 2 messages that she hasn't responded to. I'm not sure a 3rd one in a row is the way to go..

Due to how this scenario has play out I wouldn't write her.

• First she flake on you and gave you an excuse. Good
• Then you message her back saying you understand and you could find some other time to hang out, but, i don't like it that mucha that she didn't say something (eg. "okay!" "great!" "", etc.)
• You send other message where you said the ball was on her court (A text example I think Chase wrote once in a post) and she didn't respond. Even though, she has seen it. So, if you said the ball was on her court you should stick to that and not chase.

I think you should have not played the "in your court" card on your second message. She flake once (she could have been truly busy). Why play "in your court" when you just try to meet up with her only once? Is not like she gave you 2 or 3 times a busy excuse when trying to set up something with her. My advice is that "in your court" messages should be used later when it seems you can't schedule something with her. No way on a second message.

Bottom line: I would not write her.

Cheers!

 

[Gamecrasher]

Yeah Diego, I' probably used that tactic a little too early, but it's over now. I'll move on and forget about her.