FR Girls don’t like playboys?

[TrailBlazer]

So I had this experience yesterday that really got me thinking about how being an attractive guy can work against you most of the times. It has for me.

But I’ll keep this FR light and positive, even though I’m really shook by the experience. It’s been a really valuable lesson - I just don’t know what to take away from it yet.

So I met this petite girl at an open dance class. I could see in her eyes and the way she leaned into my touch that she liked me.

So after the class I went for her, took her by the hand and told her were going to dance together. This took us away from all the other guys.

She told me I’m very direct and I told her it’s the way we do it in my country.

I was being very cocky overall, saying things like “that’s why you love me”, “I want to marry you then divorce you then have make up sex”, “you will think about us tonight”, etc.

It seemed like she liked it. I moved her around the venue a lot, touched her a lot, caressed her hair and gave her a cheek kiss. Then told her to give me one too and she did.

But then it all stopped working.

She didn’t want to give me a real kiss. No worries, we danced a bit more and then I took her to a secluded lounge area. There I did some touch routines, but she kept saying she has to go, and still didn’t want to kiss me. I started feeling needy.

I also replied to every one of her questions jokingly (like “what’s your favorite food? - dog meat), to which she said I don’t even feel like a real person. So I tried being more serious after that, but of course being serious doesn’t build attraction. And for ONS you don't need much comfort.

Well anyway I took her instagram and then she went to her friend and started packing her things. So I immediately went to another girl - this is supposed to be cool playboy behavior, but I feel like not even saying goodbye to the girl made her feel unimportant? Or made me look angry that it didn’t work out?

I’m thinking this because she didn’t even approve my request on instagram.

I thought it was because I made her feel easy, so I sent her a message (you can send one to unapproved requests) saying it was fun talking to her and to enjoy her weekend.

But no response which is interesting. This was probably a 9/10 seduction process, I was being very cocky and funny, but it still didn’t work.

And now I feel needy for texting her despite her not approving me yet.

What do you think? Was I too direct or not direct enough? (I should have moved her more?)

I would YOLO her more but on these events you may see her again.

Other than that it’s been a great experience!

 

[OldGuy]

Too much joking. You should have given some real answers, such as favorite food to build similarity.

 

[TrailBlazer]

Too much joking. You should have given some real answers, such as favorite food to build similarity.

I did literally that after she told me I was joking too much - we talked about food, movies, etc. I was serious for about 30% of the time in total.

Maybe I didn’t show her I actually liked her for who she is, and so she felt like I just want sex with anyone? Maybe that’s why she didn’t add me on ig later? Because she seemed to like me a lot in person.

 

[TrailBlazer]

Also I just realised something: a different girl that has been feeling me that night but has been flirting with other guys too, spoke to me at the end of the party. She told me she has to walk a long way to her home and that maybe I lived closer. I wanted to use an attraction building technique do I said I lived on the moon. Then I said, just kidding I live quite nearby. But nothing was said after that and she joined the other guys.

I just realised maybe she gave me a chance to invite her to an “after party” at my house? But I just realised this 24 hours later and also I didn’t use almost any techniques on her. Almost every guy would miss this window. I wonder how do even women get laid if the windows are so well hidden?

Also it would be too easy to pull like this, what about my 10 years of studying game. Lately it’s almost been offensive how easy some situations seem. I’m here to practice game, not to have it easy. Am I right?

 

[ChrisXKiss]

Also I just realised something: a different girl that has been feeling me that night but has been flirting with other guys too, spoke to me at the end of the party. She told me she has to walk a long way to her home and that maybe I lived closer. I wanted to use an attraction building technique do I said I lived on the moon. Then I said, just kidding I live quite nearby. But nothing was said after that and she joined the other guys.

I just realised maybe she gave me a chance to invite her to an “after party” at my house? But I just realised this 24 hours later and also I didn’t use almost any techniques on her. Almost every guy would miss this window. I wonder how do even women get laid if the windows are so well hidden?

Also it would be too easy to pull like this, what about my 10 years of studying game. Lately it’s almost been offensive how easy some situations seem. I’m here to practice game, not to have it easy. Am I right?

First of all this can happen to everyone, especially when they are inexperienced. I remember I had a girl invite me to her place for tea after a party, and I just went there for the tea, never made any move, and at some point she told me she was tired and wanted to sleep and I should go.

The thing is that it’s important to learn from situations like this and at least be attuned to similar types of escalation windows. I would never let such a scenario without escalating now.

So if this is something that is happening regularly you should pay more attention to how the interaction is going and what kind of escalation window you can use. Always have your mind on the close.

For example I wouldn’t say that it was needed to take her and leave the party then and there if it wasn’t the time for that, but at least tell her that she could crash at your place if it gets very late.

And if it was the time just mention the same thing, or propose to walk together since your place is towards that area and start going. You can frame it as just keeping her safe for the night, if she is interested she will throw more signs and windows to you as you are getting close to the seduction location.

I am not sure what you mean by her joining the other guys though. Are they the guys she was flirting with? Some friends she already knew? I doubt she simply thought ok let’s go get a gangbang with these studs, probably they had a better vibe together so they sticked to each other.

If you have won both her and her friends it is possible they will trust you to bring her home safely. If they are not friends but random guys, and she decides to stick with them, either she really likes one of them more or she at least thinks that they will be able to close better than you.

I guess there is also always the chance that she was just chit chatting and this was a polite exchange of information about where each of you lives, but that is something you can more or less feel by how interested she seems to you.

The point is that all of this is taken care of by having your mind on the signs and taking advantage of the opportunity when it presents itself. Even if she is totally uninterested it’s better to be ready for the best scenario.

And regarding how they get laid, by finding someone they like that eventually notices their windows and ends their frustration.

Also for the easiness, I don’t see why it’s bad, sometimes it can happen. And even if it seems really easy, you still did something game wise well to get there, at the very least you improved your looks enough for her to immediately like you in a very quick pull.

Is the point to only sleep with women that are completely indifferent to you at first against all possible odds? It is nice if that’s a very hot woman that you really like, but if another hot one made it way easier to you, unless you have reached the level of abundance that you really do game for the skill improvement and don’t care about losing easy lays, I’d say just going for the easy one makes sense a lot of times.

The opposite would be like a soccer player deciding that only bicycle kicks or goals after dribbling 3-4 defenders are worth it, and start missing all the easy ones.

Like they don’t equally get the ball(s) deep inside the posts.

 

[TrailBlazer]

First of all this can happen to everyone, especially when they are inexperienced. I remember I had a girl invite me to her place for tea after a party, and I just went there for the tea, never made any move, and at some point she told me she was tired and wanted to sleep and I should go.

The thing is that it’s important to learn from situations like this and at least be attuned to similar types of escalation windows. I would never let such a scenario without escalating now.

So if this is something that is happening regularly you should pay more attention to how the interaction is going and what kind of escalation window you can use. Always have your mind on the close.

For example I wouldn’t say that it was needed to take her and leave the party then and there if it wasn’t the time for that, but at least tell her that she could crash at your place if it gets very late.

And if it was the time just mention the same thing, or propose to walk together since your place is towards that area and start going. You can frame it as just keeping her safe for the night, if she is interested she will throw more signs and windows to you as you are getting close to the seduction location.

I am not sure what you mean by her joining the other guys though. Are they the guys she was flirting with? Some friends she already knew? I doubt she simply thought ok let’s go get a gangbang with these studs, probably they had a better vibe together so they sticked to each other.

If you have won both her and her friends it is possible they will trust you to bring her home safely. If they are not friends but random guys, and she decides to stick with them, either she really likes one of them more or she at least thinks that they will be able to close better than you.

I guess there is also always the chance that she was just chit chatting and this was a polite exchange of information about where each of you lives, but that is something you can more or less feel by how interested she seems to you.

The point is that all of this is taken care of by having your mind on the signs and taking advantage of the opportunity when it presents itself. Even if she is totally uninterested it’s better to be ready for the best scenario.

And regarding how they get laid, by finding someone they like that eventually notices their windows and ends their frustration.

Also for the easiness, I don’t see why it’s bad, sometimes it can happen. And even if it seems really easy, you still did something game wise well to get there, at the very least you improved your looks enough for her to immediately like you in a very quick pull.

Is the point to only sleep with women that are completely indifferent to you at first against all possible odds? It is nice if that’s a very hot woman that you really like, but if another hot one made it way easier to you, unless you have reached the level of abundance that you really do game for the skill improvement and don’t care about losing easy lays, I’d say just going for the easy one makes sense a lot of times.

The opposite would be like a soccer player deciding that only bicycle kicks or goals after dribbling 3-4 defenders are worth it, and start missing all the easy ones.

Like they don’t equally get the ball(s) deep inside the posts.

Thank you, great points. I can’t agree on the easiness part though. We are trying to become good seducers, not to necessarily have sex. A good seducer always chooses the more difficult scenario. We play because we enjoy the game and want the validation from getting good reactions, we don’t need the sex.

If I’m being honest I’d much rather go for the impossible challenge and pull off something amazing, than to just lay a girl that any other guy could. There isn’t much glory in just having sex. We are trying to become world class, aren’t we?

Or maybe I’m coping here, but when you think about it, 10 years of studying game just to become a normal guy? I need to become special.

Also about the situation, the other guys were ones she met at the party, but they were all much cooler than me - or at least they seemed self-assured. I don’t think I could compete with them. That would mess up my inner game - I study game because I’m not a cool guy who can steal a girl from other cool guys. I was bullied in school, I’m not one of the cool guys. Or I don’t feel like one yet.

 

[OldGuy]

She dd not think they were more desirable than you, or she would have asked them if they lined closer! By not taking her home, you just confirmed to yourself that they were cooler than you (coolest guy does not always win). And when you get really good, it is always easy.