Girls give me the FU look but I mess up by playing the BF role

[ajx032]

So girls give me that FU look alot of time lately since I started practicing kundalini yoga and david deida. Before I went overboard with my confidence and didnt know what I was doing. Anyway my look is more of a rebel sometimes a handsome boyfriend material. Problem is once a girls sees u as BF u aint getting laid period. I dont have the confidence to wait for sex after more than 1 date. Reading these articles of how to not fall for BF category are tough to accept. So I meet a girl with high energy and she gives her number within few mins. She texts me right away and is ON. This is where I mess up:

Take them on a date;
compliment them;
they ask what i do;
Tell them how Im successful working on my business, have goals;
Talk about my future goals;
Ask her about her dreams, fav artists, her goals, where does she see herself.
Date ends and no kiss.
She ends up not picking up the phone after that.

Like I can feel she wants me as the rebel cause thats my dress style. But my personality is BF material. My vibe is random,mysterious

Read articles by Chaste and that was a hard pill to swallow. Messed up cause I couldnt believe it. Now a girl wants to F me but I when I try to escalate she says NO. Its like I need her permission to act. Any tips?

 

[wahoo]

I think you need to read a lot of stuff on the site to have a basic understanding first.

 

[ajx032]

I get numbers and first dates easily. its the date that i start giving BF vibe. qualifying myself so they can sleep with me. i barely lead. usually they reject my lead. ill says lets get out of here and go to this afterparty at my place. they usually dont. i feel like they want me to just take them. how do u just take them? my leading is asking for permission.

 

[ray_zorse]

Hey man, since you know what you are doing wrong, what's your plan to correct those issues?

By the way, if you want help, try to focus on a specific interaction and a specific question about that interaction, generalizations don't help and can be a vehicle for negative thinking. If you have a specific interaction write a FR on it.

I also suggest to focus on one issue at a time e.g. "for my next 5 interactions I am going to focus on leading dominantly without asking for permission first". Or even more specific subgoals "I am going to take her hand and lead her somewhere within the first 5 minutes".

Finally, check out the newbie assignment. If you're starting well behind the 8-ball, which you are judging by your other posts, you will need hundreds if not thousands of practice interactions to get the problems out of your game, so the only way to get enough girls to practice on is to cold approach them systematically (not to be discouraging but I am up to about 2000 approaches and my game still has a lot of problems, on the plus side I have seen improvement).

Ray

 

[Adam101]

Take a look back at your conversation outline, and note the topics you discuss; your career, degree of success, ambition. By discussing these things you are presenting yourself as a provider. Out the gate you are conveying to her what you can, materialistically, offer and are asking if she wants to join your game plan. Think of it like the relationship version of presenting a business model. By doing this you're putting yourself in provider / BF / LTR status. If you have a rebel look like you say then I would also add that your image probably doesn't match the secure, stable person moving forward that you present yourself as. Women shut down when they detect a man as being incongruent.

The good news is it sounds like an easy fix if you remain aware of it. Instead of talking about the aforementioned stuff talk about more lighthearted things. Start with some small talk and use that to figure out what turns her on. When I started reading this site and learned about deep diving, I made what is probably a common mistake and would try to deep dive more or less right off the bat. Doing that made girls shut down on me. So instead, I would lead off asking about how they're feeling in the moment which got conversations off to a much better start. From there you can start fishing for things and once you hit a topic where she lights up that's when the DD comes in.

Try those adjustments and see how it works for you and let us know. Best of luck!