Giving "cheating" girlfriend a second chance??

[ChrisCassi]

So basically title says all. My girlfriend had been fighting a lot at the time, and then about a month ago she went on a date with someone else. She told me immediately afterwards, crying and apologizing. She says nothing happened or anything like that, but she has feelings for him. I broke up with her so I could give myself some space to think and such.

Now I haven't really felt depressed or upset cuz I already know there are plenty of women out there to bide my time with and I have done that. She keeps texting me all the time apologizing and saying she doesn't care for him but only wants me.

Am I over reacting and give her a another chance or just move on? I love this girl so I just wanna make sure I make the right choice. And again, as far as she's told me they didn't kiss or have sex. Just a date.

 

[Whizzy]

I personally wouldn't give her a chance as it seems she new that she was doing something hurtful, but chose to do it anyways. Have you asked her why she did it? I'm assuming due to the fighting, but I cant tell what the source of the fighting is from the given information.

 

[ChrisCassi]

Her excuse was that we were fighting a lot and that she thought I was gonna leave her.

 

[Whizzy]

The decision, as always, is up to you my man. If this happened once then it can always happen again sad to say, especially if she is let off the hook too easily

 

[Rhaegar]

No you should not give her another chance. She cheated on you man wtf why would you even still talking to her?

And she probably did way more then just go on a "date" with this guy.

 

[Just_Dave]

Don't give her a second chance. If you give her a second chance it sets a bad precedent for the ongoing relationship.

 

[Drck]

The real problem is the fighting, her attempt for cheating is just a side effect... You take her back, everything might be ok for a while, but the fighting might come back if both of you don't do anything about it...

"She told me immediately afterwards, crying and apologizing. She says nothing happened or anything like that, but she has feelings for him"
>>>> She could be lying, but I could - of course - be wrong. If nothing happened she would not be crying and apologizing. She knew she did something wrong, and by telling you she wanted to clear her conscious. The question is, what was the "wrong" thing that she did...

"Her excuse was that we were fighting a lot and that she thought I was gonna leave her."
>>>> Fuck no. She is trying to throw her bad decision and behavior back on you, she is trying to share the responsibility. Don't accept the excuse. She is saying: It is your fault that I was cheating. In a sense she is right because you guys are fighting and thus damaging attraction, but you should make it clear that it was her bad deed, and not yours.

This relationship already has some negativity:
* Fighting a lot
* She's disrespected you once
* She admited she has feelings for the other guy, and she acted upon those feelings, which means there were less feelings for you...

It is not impossible to fix it, should you chose that way, but the real problems are these fights. When girl is in love with one guy she doesn't have feelings for another. IMO she went for a date with him because she saw something exciting in him, but got disappointed and ran back to you, appologizing...

So as always, it depends on what you want with this girl. Occasional sex, some fun, and eventually move on, ok, no big deal. If you have other decent choices and good Abundance Mentality, let her go. On the other hand, if you are looking for long term solid relationship because you have real feelings for her, you and her have some work to do. You need to increase your respect, you have to setup clear boundaries, and she needs to know that if something similar like that happens again she is gone forever, and there won't be coming back next time. I would also add some compliance requests, make her do extra things for you, and her actions will tell you if she is really interested.

Good thing is that she is texting all the time, she is basically investing a lot into you, she is chasing, and you by not answering her is keeping your value higher than hers...