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FU  Good Conversation then Ghosted

JRob

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Mar 6, 2016
Messages
71
Okay, so I got some degree of success with one girl on Tinder, but I'm still puzzling over what happened with the other girl. I seemed to be having a good progressive conversation and then nothing. Did I say something wrong?

Me: [song lyric opener] How's your day going?
Her: lol hi there
Me: It's wet out, I don't plan on growing gills, so I guess it's Hulu tonight.
Her: Same here. I just got of work.
Me: You just got off? Not to be cliche, but what do you do? Whatever it is sounds hard since it's kind of late.
Her: I'm a host at [local restaurant].
Me: I used to like to go there before I moved across town.
Her: Yeah, it's a cool place.
Me: Have you seen any good movies lately
Her: No, I don't watch tv, more of a Netflix/Hulu person.
Me: That's smart, I really should cut the cord. I watch Hulu and Netfix more than tv.
Her: LOL, yeah tv's dead and doesn't really have much
Me: I'll probably go see next Divergent movie on a Tuesday, but it will probably be out forever. Are you sure you don't want to see anything? I can stand to add points to my card.

That's it, nothing after that. Maybe she got spooked or maybe I was somehow insulting. Any ideas? Can I salvage it?
-J
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

WayOfHand

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 12, 2015
Messages
98
Hey JRob. I think you are overcomplicating things a bit. She already swiped you right. Light and short banter before setting up date is fine but you are putting too much effort in it. No need to validate everything the girl says, that lowers your value. Check your answers, thats literally what you are doing. Also your texts are way longer than hers, all of them. Try making your banter more precise and remember that tinder if anything is a numbers game. Keep on gaming!
 

Seppuku

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Aug 25, 2014
Messages
1,149
Hey JRob,

I have myself sort of specialized in dating apps as it worked well for me in my current context.

For some time I collected some statistics - all documented in my journal. Just to give an idea, I found that for me, 1 match in 6 end up in a date. Overall, one date in two ended in my bed. So I need to pull 12 matches for one lay. But for this to happen, you have to follow all the interactions through.

Out of the 5 matches that didn't end up in a date, I have maybe 1 which is because I'm not interested after all, and 2 because the interaction "just died out". Sounds like what you experienced here. It could be because she's not that interested, or because I didn't follow up in a timely manner, or something else came up on her side. An additional one didn't end up in a date, because of awful logistics, and one for misc reasons.

So yes, this happens, and it's a number game. Get 25 matches a month, follow them all through to the end, and you're good.

Oh, and you may want to try other mobile dating apps. I find that some apps work better than others depending on the location. In Qatar Tinder gives me nothing. In the UAE, Tinder is overtaken mostly by prostitutes. In the Philippines, Tinder gives more quality matches than I can reasonably handle. Don't neglect other apps and see what works best for you.

Cheers,
Seppuku
PS. I agree also with WayOfHand on his analysis
 
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