Good looks and Attraction (NOT COMPLAINING)

[Rookie]

Ok, before I get started on this post let me make something clear. This is not a post about me complaining about looks. Quite frankly, I know I look good (that is, after working on my fundamentals). I actually wanted to know that despite having good looks and definitely receiving attraction from girls initially. Could you still fuck up? (I'm guessing the answer is, "of course you can!!" but it feels better to hear it from someone else too). I ask this because it drives me crazy because I feel like i'm wasting opportunities because of poor game and sometimes I find out that someone with average looks is apparently "hot" to a some girls. So my second and last question is (which again, I think I know the answer, it just is reassuring to hear it from someone else) "when a girl says a guy is hot (and is therefore obviously attracted to him), is she referring to him in purely physical way, or is some other factor making her think that?

Thank you in advance to anyone who answers.

 

[Thedoctor]

Rookie,

Here are quick answers:

1)Fundamentals help. Big time. But you can certainly still make lots of mistakes.

2) I'd say it's actually usually fundamentals. I've seen lots of naturally good looking guys that girls don't see as "hot" because his clothes don't fit right or he lacks self confidence, or any other number of reasons relating to fundamentals.

-John

 

[Rookie]

Thanks Doctor (great name by the way, I love that show.)

Yeah it's kind of funny. Girls usually are interested in me or curious at first but I haven't really developed a process and still need to work on being confident. And so I miss opportunities because I don't take risks and "go for it" and then I end up devalued and auto rejected.

Thanks again

 

[ProblemSolving]

Hey Rookie,

Keep in mind that even if you're good looking, with solid fundamentals AND process, you are still going to encounter A LOT of rejection. It's part of the game and there is really no way around it, so there is no need to beat yourself up over a few botched approaches.

Good looking guys that make a living teaching men how to get laid, still only sleep with roughly 7% of the girls they approach using the standard MO of opening - small talk - phone number - date - sex. I used to think that number was incredibly low until I actually looked back at my own stats and realized these numbers are pretty consistent. What that means is that if I want to bring another hot girl into my life, I'll probably have to hit on 14 new girls before I find her - and this is coming from a good looking guy with solid fundamentals and process.

As a good looking guy, you'll probably find most girls will respond positively to your approach and willingly give you their number, so you won't experience too much face to face rejection. Most of the rejections will occur when texting for the meet up. In conclusion, good looks, fundamentals and a solid process all improve our odds, but you're still ultimately playing a numbers game, so you have to learn to roll with the punches.

 

[Rookie]

Thanks ProblemSolving, you're totally right.

I needed to hear that because I have this really shitty mindset where I expect every girl I meet to be interested and attracted to me even before I say hello; which is obviously ridiculous. And If a girl didn't seem to like me I'd feel pretty shit and decide it's time to hit the books again (whereas now I know that I should just think "ah, well" and try with someone else). Thanks again for your advice.

 

[ProblemSolving]

Thanks ProblemSolving, you're totally right.

I needed to hear that because I have this really shitty mindset where I expect every girl I meet to be interested and attracted to me even before I say hello; which is obviously ridiculous. And If a girl didn't seem to like me I'd feel pretty shit and decide it's time to hit the books again (whereas now I know that I should just think "ah, well" and try with someone . Thanks again for your advice.

You've got the right attitude, Rookie. Have a look at these logs from experienced guys in the field. One from Ricardus, where he manages to shoot 2/11 and admits these results were above average.

https://www.girlschase.com/content/why-she-doesnt-need-instant-date

And one from Good Looking Loser using a larger, more accurate sample size, manages to shoot 7/102

http://www.goodlookingloser.com/ent...-is-a-numbers-game-the-odds-are-in-your-favor

So fire away my friend and don't get discouraged when a bunch of them don't land.