Hey y'all!
Regarding the prefix: I hadn't spoken or seen this girl in about 5 years - we weren't friends when I bumped into her, so I'm going to categorise this as a FR.
I'm a 20 year old dude, and I first met Ellie back in 2007 - I would've been a 12 back then, in year 7. We remained pretty good friends throughout 2007 and 2008. I always thought that she was slightly annoying, but I enjoyed her company nonetheless. I moved to a new school at the start of 2009, and for about a year Ellie would message me constantly on MSN, at least a couple of times a week. I'd respond to most of her messages but never initiated. We fell out of contact eventually. In 2010, she messaged me this:
I bumped into Ellie whilst working as a street fundraiser. She turned out to bloom into quite a beautiful blonde bombshell. My fundamentals seemed to be pretty good, which set the pacing for pretty solid sexual tension. I messaged her on Facebook and we set up a date. At this point, both of us weren't sure whether we were catching up as old friends, or something more, since I didn't show any direct interest.
The night before she messaged me: "Hey still on for tomorrow?" The chase dynamic seemed to be in my favour.
On the day of the date, we meet at the heart of Melbourne in a major shopping centre. She's running a little late so I sit down one of the seats as I calmly browse my phone. She arrivesand seemed visibly nervous. We walks quickly towards me and immediately extends her arms out for a hug. I take my time in standing up and give her a warm embrace after about 3 seconds of leaving her hanging. "So sorry I'm late!" she apologises. I suggest grabbing some coffee, but she's hungry so we decide to grab some food. We walk along a busy street, trying to find a place to eat. The air seems slightly tense.
At the traffic light, she turns to me.
We eventually decide to dine in a Thai restaurant. We sit directly opposite each other, so there's not a lot of opportunity to physically escalate. I make sure to speak calmly and slowly, ensuring that my posturing is straight at every moment. I deep-dive her, albeit sloppily. Turns out she recently broke up with her boyfriend. Diving a bit deeper, she also reveals that she had a little bit of a fling with an old friend over the weekend. For the most part, my face expression seems slightly bored. She mentions to me that she feels a little bit guilty sleeping with someone so quickly after breaking up. She complains a little bit about the guy she hooked up with - he was jobless, wasn't going to university, didn't have a car, and didn't seem to have his life together. I look her straight in the eyes. She seemed to be pretty focused on receiving approval and validation from me.
Throughout the conversation, I try to build up sexual tension, but I do so sloppily - my dialogue doesn't seem fluid, and there seems to be a strange vibe. Not sure whether it's coming from me or her. We continue the conversation and we reminisce about high school and our mutual friends, but the conversation seems slightly forced. I think on my feet, and set up a chase frame.
The conversation continues but feels like it's dying - especially since I can't touch her. We both live really far away from the city, so pulling is out of the question. Eventually we come upon the topic of travelling.
That weekend, I was hanging out with friends, playing music. At one point one of my friends says: "Hey guys can we just like fuck off to the skate park or something?" In the context of the moment, it was absolutely hilarious. I was trying to recreate the same humour, but I just came off sounding like a racist asshole. It wasn't until 5 seconds afterwards until I realised what I said sounded really racist, but I didn't say anything about it.
At this point I'm absolutely mortified, and I feel the conversation dying, just as we finish up on all our food. What a disaster! I think to myself. I decide to call quits, and leave.
Before standing up I mention being invited to an old friend's (from our same high school) birthday party. I ask if she's coming. She said that she never got invited but wanted me to take her as a plus one. As I'm standing up, I slowly edge out of our little booth, but she remains stationary in her seat for a good 20 seconds. She's not doing anything - just talking to me, as if she wants me to stick around for longer.
We walk out of the restaurant. We're heading different ways. The overall impression I got from the date was boring, slightly forced and tense, and lacking excitement. I'm not planning on seeing her again. We continue a boring conversation until suddenly and abruptly:
Out of the blue at 1am the next morning:
-----
Final thoughts: Ellie is a little bit of an awkward person. She's definitely changed a lot as a person and grew up to be a pretty gorgeous and kinda weird gal. I initially thought that the date seemed pretty bad, (lack of touch, sub-par deep-diving, uncomfortable sphere of tension, really inadvertently racist comment). Although I think I did well in a couple of things too: slow movement and speech, which seemed her put her a little bit on the edge as well and made her a little bit nervous. I'm thinking that the chase frame: "you used to like me" was solid - I'm betting she headed on home after that giving it some thought.
I'm thinking that I can probably sleep with Ellie if I can isolate her. I live with my parents and we're both far away from the city, (2 hours to travel between each other) so logistics is an issue. I my follow up message would look something like:
As always, thanks for reading.
- Jeff
Regarding the prefix: I hadn't spoken or seen this girl in about 5 years - we weren't friends when I bumped into her, so I'm going to categorise this as a FR.
I'm a 20 year old dude, and I first met Ellie back in 2007 - I would've been a 12 back then, in year 7. We remained pretty good friends throughout 2007 and 2008. I always thought that she was slightly annoying, but I enjoyed her company nonetheless. I moved to a new school at the start of 2009, and for about a year Ellie would message me constantly on MSN, at least a couple of times a week. I'd respond to most of her messages but never initiated. We fell out of contact eventually. In 2010, she messaged me this:
Apparently I set up a pretty good chase frame in 2010 as a 15 year old without even realising it! She never ended up coming to the social with me. She messaged me a couple more times thereafter, but I ignored all her messages. Eventually she got the hint, and stopped messaging me. We fell out of contact for 5 years until a week ago.Monday, 5 April 2010
(11:24 PM) Ellie: jeff
(11:24 PM) Jeff: how are you?
(11:26 PM) Ellie: hey are you still going social?
im good extremely tired but good you?
(11:27 PM) Jeff : extremely tired too
i dunno if im going yet
(11:27 PM) Jeff : maybe but maybe not
(11:30 PM) Ellie: awww lets goooo i wanna goo
(11:30 PM) Jeff : yeh
(11:31 PM) Jeff : carole spoke to me about this too
today
but i'm too tired now
(11:31 PM) Ellie: she wants to go too!
(11:31 PM) Jeff : i'll talk to you tomorow
(11:31 PM) Ellie: what no!
take me not her take meeeee meee memememee
(11:31 PM) Ellie: i asked first
(11:31 PM) Jeff : i can take as many gilrs as i want
(11:31 PM) Ellie: you can?
(11:31 PM) Jeff : yeh
(11:31 PM) Ellie: ohh you can like pimp out
no just take me just me
(11:31 PM) Jeff : i take 100 if i wanted
(11:32 PM) Jeff : lmao pimp out
(11:32 PM) Ellie: okayyy but yeah im no 1 on the list right?
(11:32 PM) Jeff : sure why not
but i gtg now
(11:32 PM) Ellie: yeah i so am
(11:32 PM) Jeff : talk to you later!
(11:33 PM) Ellie: I OWN YOU 100 OTHER GIRLS!
okay good night
(11:33 PM) Ellie: byeee xoxoo cant wait till the social![]()
I bumped into Ellie whilst working as a street fundraiser. She turned out to bloom into quite a beautiful blonde bombshell. My fundamentals seemed to be pretty good, which set the pacing for pretty solid sexual tension. I messaged her on Facebook and we set up a date. At this point, both of us weren't sure whether we were catching up as old friends, or something more, since I didn't show any direct interest.
The night before she messaged me: "Hey still on for tomorrow?" The chase dynamic seemed to be in my favour.
On the day of the date, we meet at the heart of Melbourne in a major shopping centre. She's running a little late so I sit down one of the seats as I calmly browse my phone. She arrivesand seemed visibly nervous. We walks quickly towards me and immediately extends her arms out for a hug. I take my time in standing up and give her a warm embrace after about 3 seconds of leaving her hanging. "So sorry I'm late!" she apologises. I suggest grabbing some coffee, but she's hungry so we decide to grab some food. We walk along a busy street, trying to find a place to eat. The air seems slightly tense.
At the traffic light, she turns to me.
Her: Your hair colour looks really good on you by the way!
Me: [pause] Thanks. Yours too!
Her: Thanks!
Me: When did you decide you want to dye it blonde?
...
We eventually decide to dine in a Thai restaurant. We sit directly opposite each other, so there's not a lot of opportunity to physically escalate. I make sure to speak calmly and slowly, ensuring that my posturing is straight at every moment. I deep-dive her, albeit sloppily. Turns out she recently broke up with her boyfriend. Diving a bit deeper, she also reveals that she had a little bit of a fling with an old friend over the weekend. For the most part, my face expression seems slightly bored. She mentions to me that she feels a little bit guilty sleeping with someone so quickly after breaking up. She complains a little bit about the guy she hooked up with - he was jobless, wasn't going to university, didn't have a car, and didn't seem to have his life together. I look her straight in the eyes. She seemed to be pretty focused on receiving approval and validation from me.
Her: It's not bad that I hooked up so quickly after breaking up is it?
Me: It's your life - I say do whatever you'd like to do.
-----
Her: It's not bad that I want a guy to be educated, and have his life together right?
Me: Sound like you're trying to slot him into the boyfriend category already!
Her: No it's not that! I just want my guy to be someone put together you know..? That's not a bad thing right?
Me: Sure, each to their own.
Throughout the conversation, I try to build up sexual tension, but I do so sloppily - my dialogue doesn't seem fluid, and there seems to be a strange vibe. Not sure whether it's coming from me or her. We continue the conversation and we reminisce about high school and our mutual friends, but the conversation seems slightly forced. I think on my feet, and set up a chase frame.
Me: Haha! I still remember when you had this huge crush on my in high school.
Her: What... really?! I don't remember that at all!
Me: Yeah, you had a pretty big thing for me... you told me! (she didn't actually tell me, but I kind of knew)
Her: Oh well haha, I kind of had a crush on everyone back in highschool!
The conversation continues but feels like it's dying - especially since I can't touch her. We both live really far away from the city, so pulling is out of the question. Eventually we come upon the topic of travelling.
Me: If you met your dream man and moved to say... Russia, do you think you'd like it?
Her: I don't know! If I could support myself and had a good job, I guess so. I don't like the idea of being dependent on someone. I suppose if Russia doesn't work out, I can always go back to Finland, because it's close. (Ellie is from Finland)
Me: [terrible attempt at a joke] Yeah, I suppose if the Russia thing doesn't work out, you can always fuck off back to Finland.
That weekend, I was hanging out with friends, playing music. At one point one of my friends says: "Hey guys can we just like fuck off to the skate park or something?" In the context of the moment, it was absolutely hilarious. I was trying to recreate the same humour, but I just came off sounding like a racist asshole. It wasn't until 5 seconds afterwards until I realised what I said sounded really racist, but I didn't say anything about it.
At this point I'm absolutely mortified, and I feel the conversation dying, just as we finish up on all our food. What a disaster! I think to myself. I decide to call quits, and leave.
Before standing up I mention being invited to an old friend's (from our same high school) birthday party. I ask if she's coming. She said that she never got invited but wanted me to take her as a plus one. As I'm standing up, I slowly edge out of our little booth, but she remains stationary in her seat for a good 20 seconds. She's not doing anything - just talking to me, as if she wants me to stick around for longer.
We walk out of the restaurant. We're heading different ways. The overall impression I got from the date was boring, slightly forced and tense, and lacking excitement. I'm not planning on seeing her again. We continue a boring conversation until suddenly and abruptly:
We say our goodbyes.Her: Where do you live again?
Me: [Long pause and very slow deliberate movements as I lock in eye contact. I give her the "Ha. I gotcha now" look, especially considering that she already knew where I lived (we spoke about it over Facebook. The silence was probably for about 1 second.
Her: [seems visibly nervous and hasty] Wait you live in Patterson right?
Me: [slow spread smirk] Yeah.
-----more talking-----
Me: Well Ellie, it was cool bumping into you again.
Her: Yeah it was! We should do it again sometime!
Me: Well hey, I'm not sure what my schedule or your's is looking like - but we'll sort something out.
Out of the blue at 1am the next morning:
Her: hey good catching up today
sorry if i was weird ahahha
Me: Yeah it was fun! Haha how were you weird..?
Her: Haha just like talking too much
Me: Haha that's cool, don't worry you weren't being weird
But let's get together again sometime soon!
Her: Hahah good
Yeah we should
-----
Final thoughts: Ellie is a little bit of an awkward person. She's definitely changed a lot as a person and grew up to be a pretty gorgeous and kinda weird gal. I initially thought that the date seemed pretty bad, (lack of touch, sub-par deep-diving, uncomfortable sphere of tension, really inadvertently racist comment). Although I think I did well in a couple of things too: slow movement and speech, which seemed her put her a little bit on the edge as well and made her a little bit nervous. I'm thinking that the chase frame: "you used to like me" was solid - I'm betting she headed on home after that giving it some thought.
I'm thinking that I can probably sleep with Ellie if I can isolate her. I live with my parents and we're both far away from the city, (2 hours to travel between each other) so logistics is an issue. I my follow up message would look something like:
Initially it seemed that Ellie wasn't all that interested in me (sexual tension was a bit lacking), but then again she is a bit of an awkward and quirky girl. I think she's probably pretty interested in me - what do you guys think? What could I have improved on to make my seduction smoother?Me: Haha that's cool, don't worry you weren't being weird
But let's get together again sometime soon!
Her: Hahah good
Yeah we should
Me: I can whip up a mean fried rice dish, if you're up for having your mind blown
How's next week sometime?
As always, thanks for reading.
- Jeff