Help With Limiting Beliefs

[Adam101]

Before I get into it, this recent article gives a pretty good overview of where I'm at:

https://www.girlschase.com/content/there-aren-t-enough-girls-or-are-there

I'm having the issue of not seeing the pretty single women. Every venue I go to it seems all of the attractive women are somehow spoken for, assuming i see any to begin with. I think part of the issue stems from me trying to work on pre-opening a bit and using eye contact to try and spot girls who would be receptive to me. But as we know clubs are crowded, loud spaces and every element is competing for girls' attention. Because of this, and granted I may just be terrible at noticing, I can never get a girl to glance my way to establish eye contact or get any other sort of pre-open flirt game going. This leaves me with the shotgun approach of essentially inserting myself into a girl's world and introducing myself. I have reasonable success but it is predicated upon me trying to target the available women and right now I'm just not seeing them.

I'll also admit I've been stalling / on a bit of a dry streak that's getting to me. Last night i saw two gorgeous women who got approached the instant i saw them and there was another girl who was very receptive to me but i got cock blocked by her guy friend. I'm either not in a target rich environment resulting in minimal opportunities, or I'm blind to the ones that are there. I don't know if it is my standards or what but I think it's clear I need to make some adjustments and could use a little direction.

I also know it is bad to put pressure on oneself, but this is my last out night in my hometown before I move and I want it to be a good one. This doesn't mean I have to take a girl home, I just want to be able to make a lot of approaches and see where the chips fall. But between the above issues and living in the south where there's this sense that most women don't stay single past 22 I'm finding it to be a challenge to execute on a level that matches my motivation.

Thanks for anyone who has any tips. I'll also throw out there any suggestions for pre-opening or otherwise getting a girl's attention in a loud and crowded bar / venue short of literally taking her and commanding her attention. Cause right now that seems like my only viable game option.

 

[Man-O]

Had the same issue Adam, just broken it.
A lot of the tips on GC can increase your success rate here when it comes to getting a nr. but at the same time you'll also approach much less since you spend time on pre-opening and maybe overthinking all the long list of details you read about. A lot of the stuff here applied in-field works if you know to use what when and how but that requires more than a year of very intense gaming + it's inclining towards daygame and low-energy style imo.

What made me start approaching a lot again was KISS (keep it simple stupid). I went back to keeping it simple and focus much more on having fun than seduction.

- I didn't go for numbers, kisses or the like until I had at least been out for 4 hours talking with tons. I'd recommend not doing at all a whole night unless the girl is rly into you.
- I didn't invest much time on girls if I found them boring, even if they were hot.
- Approached immediately.
- Said what came to my mind. Sometimes it might not've been calibrated but I didn't care. Was more playful and direct.
- Kept talking with tons of ppl.

Those were the rules/goals I went out with. I find it very healthy to sometimes make drawbacks to one's game to improve on missing points here and there, meaning your learning curve wil have some breaks here and there but it's better than having a curve that goes more and more flat because you get bored or something.

 

[ProblemSolving]

Hi Adam,

I can never get a girl to glance my way to establish eye contact or get any other sort of pre-open flirt game going.

In order for this to happen, you have to get noticed. There are a number of ways to go about this (hint - girls are masters at all of these):

Height - everyone's eyes automatically gravitate to people with height initially. Wearing shoes/boots with a bit of heel can help

Wearing a Bright Color - Wearing a bright color or pattern gets you noticed. In the club, everyone's eyes will be on the cute chick in white tights, not the hot chick in the black dress.

Warm and Relaxed Facial Expression - I don't care how jacked and cool you look, if you sit around with a sour facial expression, eyes darting all over the place, no one is going to look at you. Half smile at the girls you like.

Touch Girls - In crowded, loud bars and clubs, this move is absolute money. If it's crowded and I need to get through, I put my hands on both of the girl's arms from behind or on her waist and guide her out of the way. Girls love it! I've had instant make-outs and ass smacks without ever saying a word from doing this.

Finally, if you're in a bar or club, it's fairly easy to identify the girls that are there for attention and validation, and those that are there to hook up. All you need to be able to do is count to three. Girls by themselves or with one or two friends, are very likely to be there to hook up. These girls are who you should be targeting. These girls know all the dirt on each other, so they don't have to protect their reputation and pretend that they don't hook up with guys.

Girls with 3 or more friends, are most likely there for fun and validation. They have to protect their reputation and their position in the social hierarchy, so no hooking up with randoms at the club.