Help with logistics! This girl wants my dick

karanova

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Mar 7, 2023
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Hi guys,

I am staying at a crowded AirBNB in Barcelona with my brother. There is another group with a gay guy and a blonde girl. This girl is cute in an awkward/endearing way and I keep catching her staring at me. I’ve teased her a ton, she’s qualified her self to me a bunch. But I don’t know how to seal the deal logistically. It’s hard cause I don’t have much experience.

We are only here a couple more days. I think have to get her to come out with me to grab a drink or get some food late at night then walk around Barcelona a bit while building attraction . Then maybe pull back to the apartment and fuck in the outdoor laundry area lol or something.
Hardest part will be getting her to leave her gay friend and hang with me for a bit and not look like a slut.

We went out last night all together but my brother and I split to go to a big club that they didn’t want to go to.
Thoughts?

I think I might screen for her plans first. Then plan to take a walk late in the night to the Sagrada, and invite her to come along with me either via text or if I see her late in the afternoon/evening.

maybe like, if you promise to be chill you can come on my adventure.
 
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TheEcho

Cro-Magnon Man
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Not sure why you need a date, she seems down and you're a "stranger in a strange land", pretty good recipe for no-strings-attached fun. I think it really is just having her be alone at the AirBnB and escalating. Get your bro to take the gay friend out and tell the girl you'd like to hang out for a little while just the two of you and you'll catch up with them later. If she's actually been staring at you, probably could treat this as if you pulled a date back home (kiss her in the first 10-20 minutes and escalate).

If nothing else, ask her to hang out with you before bedtime and maneuver away from any others.

Not finding much specifically on a situation like this, but here's an image of the upside: https://www.girlschase.com/content/travel-and-romance-wonders-international-friends-benefits
 
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HoofHearted

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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If she's already made up her mind (in social connections they usually have), all you need to do is get her alone and let opportunity happen
 

Chase

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When I have been in similar situations, I talked to the folks who were on my side and said, "Hey, I need to use the room to try to get with her. Can I have the room from this time to that time?" and then if there were any other people who I couldn't do that with I just made it a point to find out their schedules and pick a time they'd all be out.

The thing with getting her away from the friend -- you need to tell her you want to do something just the two of you. You can frame it as "I've really had a lot of fun with all this group stuff but I kinda hoped to do something that was just us two. Would that be cool?" If she agrees to it, you are basically in.

Biggest problem sounds like you're not actually at the point yet where you can just pull her to the room -- it's still in the "tentative flirtation" stage. I would just make the focus on finding a way to get around her physically, so you can use ample touch, whether the gay guy is there or not. If she's into it, once he figures out what is going on he should give her her space. Gay guys are huge sluts themselves... he's not going to cockblock her from getting some vacation dick. If she's feeling you, you can sort logistics then.

If logistics are screwed, you just get a lot of touch going, get her turned on, then tell her, "I really want to be alone with you. Where can we go?" and see if she has ideas, and if she doesn't, but she agrees, at least you have buy-in -- but you will need to figure it out fast. You might want to reserve a little extra cash to book an impromptu room a love hotel if nothing else manifests:


Good luck!

Chase
 

karanova

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Mar 7, 2023
Messages
8
When I have been in similar situations, I talked to the folks who were on my side and said, "Hey, I need to use the room to try to get with her. Can I have the room from this time to that time?" and then if there were any other people who I couldn't do that with I just made it a point to find out their schedules and pick a time they'd all be out.

The thing with getting her away from the friend -- you need to tell her you want to do something just the two of you. You can frame it as "I've really had a lot of fun with all this group stuff but I kinda hoped to do something that was just us two. Would that be cool?" If she agrees to it, you are basically in.

Biggest problem sounds like you're not actually at the point yet where you can just pull her to the room -- it's still in the "tentative flirtation" stage. I would just make the focus on finding a way to get around her physically, so you can use ample touch, whether the gay guy is there or not. If she's into it, once he figures out what is going on he should give her her space. Gay guys are huge sluts themselves... he's not going to cockblock her from getting some vacation dick. If she's feeling you, you can sort logistics then.

If logistics are screwed, you just get a lot of touch going, get her turned on, then tell her, "I really want to be alone with you. Where can we go?" and see if she has ideas, and if she doesn't, but she agrees, at least you have buy-in -- but you will need to figure it out fast. You might want to reserve a little extra cash to book an impromptu room a love hotel if nothing else manifests:


Good luck!

Chase
I think you're totally right about tentative flirtation. It went really horrendously bad. Possibly going to be hilarious one day, but I was in no mood to enjoy it then.

Following is a FR:

Context: I had a really bad day where I had a tense negotiation with a good friend and we both lost a lot of money. Have work stress too so my state was abysmal.

End up making plans with her for all of us to meet up at a bar. I enter and my state is just plummeting, I'm massively in my head. End up getting shit tested a bunch by everyone there (including my brother -- what a dick move) to the point where it's like a humiliation orgy at this point. I decide to take a walk with them to see this chruch at night. I do flirt a bit with her on this trip, we pull ahead of the gay guy and my brother and chat a bit, but like nothing sustained. I can't really do any kino or anything because she pulls away, or maybe she's waiting for me to just cave man her or something but that's not in my personality to do that. For context, this gay dude is autistic as fuck and not the open minded have fun whatever type. So I think he would judge the fuck out of her for being a slut. I also think he doesn't think I'm good enough or something.

So anyways, we walk back, and she is clearly trying to show off, walking in front of me, dressing slutty, etc. But I can't make a move because everyone is there and I just feel reactive. She keeps isolating herself in ways that I feel are approach invitations and we keep exchanging glasses.

Eventually she goes up at night to grab a glass of water. I figure well this is it if it's ever going to happen. I start trying to chat her up with bullshit contextual teases like nice water or something. The point is this is not tight game. But anyways, I end up saying at some point I think she's cute, and she hits me with "I have a boyfriend." I realize at this point that I am basically starting back at square one in terms of opening. So I basically say some standard thing like, oh cool I never asked. Is he single? She laughs, and I continue the conversation for like 30 seconds longer and she says she's going to bed. I'm just left standing there in front of the sink sipping my water and being like, what the fuck just happened.

If I could replay it, I'd have been approaching more throughout the day to keep my state decent and congruent with who I am. Then, that night in that interaction, I'd close the distance between us (She was at the sink, I was about 6 feet away, leaning on the counter angled away from her to not look needy), and say something like I can't decide if I like you or not (kind of true lol). I wouldn't have given away value by saying she's cute. I misjudged that at that point, she had concerns about value and congruence. Then I would have "venue changed" as in just led her outside the apartment to chat and rapport for a bit.

AND, I think there were chances to salvage the set even after the boyfriend/I'm leaving bit. I could have chased her down and spiked emotion then pulled back -- though then it becomes a low probability think. The reason I say this is she seemed to not want to leave things on those terms "right.. I forgot you don't have instagram... well... thanks for hanging out" Like she was probably trying to put me in the orbiter zone, but if a girl is talkign to you, there is something she wants, and there's a chance.

Anyways, the bigger picture is that the feelings that put me in after the "rejection" (baad) showed I wasn't in a place of abundance. Which is tricky because I have more important things than girls to focus on right now in terms of career, etc. for the short term. But I am still a virgin at 25 which means I really need to fuck and will of course be tempted to drop anything when an opportunity presents itself.
 

Chase

Chieftan
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Messages
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Oh, okay, yeah. When you start talking figuring out logistics most guys will assume you're farther along with a girl and just trying to sort out where to close the deal at. Always good to plan those out in advance. But also don't go putting the cart too far in front of the horse.

If I was you I would focus on getting a lot more comfortable touching girls for now. If she's parading around in front of you but you're holding back because you don't want other people to see you touching her, and then having to chance it all on hunting her down later to shoot your shot by telling her she's cute, you need to focus on giving yourself a lot more runway to ease into things naturally with girls by getting them physically comfortable around you.

I would suggest you worry less about what other people think for now and just focus on getting more physical contact with girls. If other people disrupt you, figure out how to deal with it then. First thing's first: can't be letting girls who like you hover off in the distance for too long without you.

Chase
 
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