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HELP! :)

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
6,551
Hi Guys

Guess you all recognize that pretty familiar word by now. When a newbie wants help, he will tend to put the word in CAPITAL LETTERS. Now that i got your attention, I need you guys to note down any post that i wrote, and tell me when you feel that i went off tangent, or you started feeling that you did not 'get me'.

I need real help. Give me an excerpt from a post that i wrote, that you start to feel that you did not understand what i am saying. This is really important to me.

PLEASE :) Give me your harsh feedback! I will eat Hacks to sweeten the pain

Zac
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
6,551
erdiuqdFVcf1S.gif



WAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY IT'S THE BIG SHOW..... *cue music*
 
the right date makes getting her back home a piece of cake

Drck

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Feb 14, 2013
Messages
1,488
Zac,

I see two things:

1. English. Brush up little bit on grammar, take one or two extra classes to improve your writings

2. Concise your ideas, use more logical sequences. Maybe give clear examples. Take a writing or public speaking classes

For example, many of your writings are not concise. You start with point A, jump to point D, go to point C and then you try to summarize point F, yet you never mention points B and E....
A > D > C > F
Its confusing, there is logic but it is difficult to grasp it

Many times it is not easy to understand because it's too convoluted, you try to give too much information at once. Many times it is not clear where you are coming from and where you are headed, what are you actually trying to describe.

We are logical and lazy creatures, we like things pre-chewed and prepared on the table in front of us. That's why we use logic: A > B > C > D > E > F.

It's easy to follow, it has logical sequence, it is clear and concise. Once you mess up this sequence, people get confused, they miss the points, they don't get what you are trying to say...

That's what can be learned in speaking or writing classes. It's actually very simple, in essence there are only three steps:

1. Introduction paragraph: Which subject will be discussed? Discuss or write about Subject A (For example, I will be writing about rejection)
2. Main body: Describe Subject A (Describe rejection, when where you rejected and why, how many times you were rejected, how did it effect your mood and so forth)
3. Summary: Summarize Subject A (Repeat the main ideas that you wanted to present, e.g. that rejections sucks. Perhaps mention what have you learned about rejections that you want to pass on...)

It's very simple and easy, it is straightforward, it repeats the main idea(s) so they can't be missed. Although it's is not really used in everyday life, it gives you the foundation on how to present different ideas clearly and concisely...

----------
Example:

Introduction paragraph:
Hey guys, I was fucking rejected again, I can't take it anymore (now we all know what are you going to write about, how you feel about it, and we want you to tell us more details)

Body:
I met this hot chick about a month ago... at first there were great vibes, she gave me her phone number and we went out. All went well, I really thought she is into me because she was smiling a lot... blah blah ...

I almost got her to my place, but then she put her breaks on as I tried to kiss her on her neck. I tried to be persistent, and kiss her one more time, but she just wouldn't go...

I texted her second day, asking what was wrong. No answers. Did she get my texts? Maybe she didn't, but I'm pretty sure that she must have gotten at least one of my messages.... I'll text her again today.... blah blah (Ok, now we know your story, we know what happened....)

Summary paragraph:
I don't know what I did wrong, need some insight, why doesn't she texts back...? Rejections hurt, I'm still thinking about her. Need some advice, maybe I need more abundance mentality?

.... Nice, neat, clear, simple, everybody can relate ... Note that the talk is about one subject (Rejection). The story could be written ten thousands different ways, but if you keep the same three simple steps, it will always be a good story....
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
6,551
Drck,

Drck said:
1. English. Brush up little bit on grammar, take one or two extra classes to improve your writings

NOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooo. My english sounds good when i am speaking. My writing however, it is as bad as the sewers. :(

Drck said:
For example, many of your writings are not concise. You start with point A, jump to point D, go to point C and then you try to summarize point F, yet you never mention points B and E....
A > D > C > F
Its confusing, there is logic but it is difficult to grasp it

Ok.

I do occasionally joke and/or go crazy, which makes people do not take me seriously, but hey, it was fun and it is still fun. XD

Now i know why that Chase mentions that he as a mentor, or precisely here, me. as a writer of the post, i need to be more resistant to emotions changing, be a guy who whoops ass and makes people listen. :) So you all must listen to me now. Obey me. I am Yuri. XD

kk i am messing around.

Drck said:
Many times it is not easy to understand because it's too convoluted, you try to give too much information at once. Many times it is not clear where you are coming from and where you are headed, what are you actually trying to describe.

Thanks man. This is gold. I think i know where i mess up.

Drck said:
It's easy to follow, it has logical sequence, it is clear and concise. Once you mess up this sequence, people get confused, they miss the points, they don't get what you are trying to say...

Drck said:
That's what can be learned in speaking or writing classes. It's actually very simple, in essence there are only three steps:

1. Introduction paragraph: Which subject will be discussed? Discuss or write about Subject A (For example, I will be writing about rejection)
2. Main body: Describe Subject A (Describe rejection, when where you rejected and why, how many times you were rejected, how did it effect your mood and so forth)
3. Summary: Summarize Subject A (Repeat the main ideas that you wanted to present, e.g. that rejections sucks. Perhaps mention what have you learned about rejections that you want to pass on...)

It's very simple and easy, it is straightforward, it repeats the main idea(s) so they can't be missed. Although it's is not really used in everyday life, it gives you the foundation on how to present different ideas clearly and concisely...

I actually did something linear like this. But i think Americans or most people from the Northern hemisphere (lolx) have a different comprehension or understanding or thought process. Coupled that with my bad writing, i just really cannot grasp it, even after 2 years!

You guys are more literal, even in words!... Hmm, damn it. How Chase make his writing universal though....... His level of relating to people is crazy. He's too brilliant.

Drck said:
Example:

Introduction paragraph:
Hey guys, I was fucking rejected again, I can't take it anymore (now we all know what are you going to write about, how you feel about it, and we want you to tell us more details)

Body:
I met this hot chick about a month ago... at first there were great vibes, she gave me her phone number and we went out. All went well, I really thought she is into me because she was smiling a lot... blah blah ...

I almost got her to my place, but then she put her breaks on as I tried to kiss her on her neck. I tried to be persistent, and kiss her one more time, but she just wouldn't go...

I texted her second day, asking what was wrong. No answers. Did she get my texts? Maybe she didn't, but I'm pretty sure that she must have gotten at least one of my messages.... I'll text her again today.... blah blah (Ok, now we know your story, we know what happened....)

Summary paragraph:
I don't know what I did wrong, need some insight, why doesn't she texts back...? Rejections hurt, I'm still thinking about her. Need some advice, maybe I need more abundance mentality?

.... Nice, neat, clear, simple, everybody can relate ... Note that the talk is about one subject (Rejection). The story could be written ten thousands different ways, but if you keep the same three simple steps, it will always be a good story....

I use this as guidelines. Then slowly i branch out. Have to start from the bottom, again. Btw, i always have so many thoughts and ideas in my mind, and i like to write things in a spontaneous manner to make it fun, thus it makes people feel like i am a youtube video with so many ads that you rather download illegally to watch it.

So yea, i achieve the objective of being fun, with my writings. But if i want people to take me seriously, i need to do things differently, same as anything else. Then i tweak the details. :)

so yea... :)

Lookout Girlschase members, i am gonna elbow drop you guys from the top rope!

Zac
 

Franco

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 14, 2012
Messages
3,637
Zac,

Moved this one to Off Topic.

One thing to keep in mind is that it is usually much easier to speak English (or any language for that matter) to someone because that person can interject in the middle of the conversation to make sure they understand you correctly. However, when you are writing a post -- especially a long post -- you have to be sure that the people reading understand Point A before moving on to Point B. If the person does not understand your first point, this is what happens:

Point A is the main point of your post, and it's the first thing you talk about. However, point A is not written well, so we don't understand it. Then you use Point A to move to Point B, but since we didn't understand Point A, then Point B makes no sense. And then you move to Point C, but we did not understand Point A, or Point B, so now we don't understand Point C!

So the important thing is make sure that your MAIN point is very, very clear. Re-read your post before hitting the "Submit" button and ask yourself, "is the main point of my post clear enough?" Even if your written English is not amazing, as long as you make sure the main point (in this case, "Point A") is very clear, then we will have a much easier time understanding Point B, Point C, etc. =)

- Franco
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
6,551
Franco,

Franco said:
make sure that your MAIN point is very, very clear. Re-read your post before hitting the "Submit" button and ask yourself, "is the main point of my post clear enough?" Even if your written English is not amazing, as long as you make sure the main point (in this case, "Point A") is very clear, then we will have a much easier time understanding Point B, Point C, etc. =)

- Franco

How many times have you think of killing me? :(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( OMG

Zac
 
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