Hey Everyone!

[MB67]

I've been reading the articles on here and think they're really helpful, I've noticed my ability to approach has increased significantly since I started.

A little about me: you wouldn't think I'd have trouble with approaching or sealing the deal with girls. I'm a college football player, on an extremely tight knit team. I have tons of friends, both male and female, and we go out nearly every night. We prefer clubs, and I'm perfectly okay with dancing. Not very good, but hey I do what I can. Girls seem comfortable around me, since they're always taking pictures with me and the cheerleading captain has me on speed dial to escort home girls who are too drunk to walk back on their own. Socially, I'm pretty set. The only downside is that my social circle doesn't extend beyond the team and our cheerleaders, as well as the immediate friends that they bring around us.

Thing is though, I seem completely unable to capitalize on this.

First problem is probably that I'm not in a glamour position like quarterback, receiver or whatever. I'm a center. So naturally I'm a large man. That said, I'm notable for being very athletic and mobile, not fat and unmovable. Regardless, I'm not quite sure if girls find me attractive enough for my approaches to work. When I do, the girls will always talk to me for awhile, but always end up walking away at some point. I've gotten four numbers in the past three months out of many approaches, none of which has gone anywhere.

Second, sure I'm in the club most every night with the hottest girls on campus taking selfies and dancing around me, kissing me on the cheek or whatever, but I'm definitely friendzoned by most as far as I can tell. I have trouble picking up on IOIs. I've only had one girl dance on me in recent memory, one of the cheerleaders (and I did actually go home with her) but beyond that I haven't been laid in months.

Anyway, I'm just looking for some tweaking with my game. Hopefully without sounding like a bitch, its a bit frustrating to see my mates go home with five star girls every night with ease, while I seem unable to do so. Thanks everyone!

 

[Sophisticated Gent]

MB67,

Welcome to GC. From the read there are some issues with your fundamental. Unfortunately there are not enough details to help. Start writing field reports with details of your interactions. Also describe to us you style.

Girls seem comfortable around me, since they're always taking pictures with me and the cheerleading captain has me on speed dial to escort home girls who are too drunk to walk back on their own. Socially, I'm pretty set.

One thing I see in your social circle is you are considered a buddy to the girls. It will be tough to change this. You are going to have to develop some preselection by bring in outside girls who are into you to show the circle girls you are desirable. You need to meet other girls outside your social circle. Invite them to one of your social circle parties. After you do this a couple of times hopefully the other girls will get the hint. These girls don't have to be real hot but reasonably attractive. You may get some shit for bringing in an outsider but just stand your ground.

I also think you need to approach girls outside you circle. You may not be the QB but there are a lot of girls who will think you are special. Dig into the fundamental and approaching articles on here. Also jump into the newbie assignment link below. You may not need all of it but there is a lot of good stuff in there.

viewtopic.php?f=13&t=34

Good luck

SGent

 

[MB67]

Thank you for the reply, I appreciate it.

I should have clarified that I don't spend a lot of time pursuing the cheerleaders since I already know they're not much of an option for me. Most of my, and my teammates, approaches are from people outside our social group. I'm going to take your advice though: tonight we're going to make an appearance at a club so I'll write a detailed 'field report' afterwards. Also, I'm sorry for not providing enough detail, I'm still new to writing this stuff out.

 

[Fuck This]

MB what makes you , YOU? There are 50 other "football players" . Take that away and what do you have?

When you meet someone , say in your stats class and introduce yourself and they reply "oh of course I know you, you are on the football team."

At that point is your cue to tell them, with a grin.. "Well I'm a lot more than just a number on the field". I'd like to share a cup of coffee with you and find out more about you."

The idea is to develop a more intimate understanding between yourself and the girl in this case outside of a "Social" setting with others. You already have the "protector vibe" so give them a hint of a look behind the scenes so to speak. Don't throw back the curtain, but pique their interest with your mysterious personality behind the big rough exterior. Think of all the NCAA commercials about Student athletes and how they are off the field. That is your angle.

You can also use your size to your advantage for more kino. Compare Hand sizes, Let the little athletic girls do pull ups on your arm, Be that "huggable big bear" (to a point).

At the same time, make an effort to smile more. Us big guys can be intimidating, Especially with facial hair. Think Smile with your eyes and make eye contact.

 

[MB67]

Rocky: Excellent point my friend, thanks for the advice. I'll work on that as well.

 

[Sophisticated Gent]

MB,

Do worry about your first write up. Most of us aren't good the first time through. Once you get started there are a couple of guys here who are good at being the BIg Man on Campus (BMC) type. We may be able to get them to help you stand out. BMC is about attitude. You don't have to be the QB to be the BMC.

You mentioned you are going to a club tonight. I am not a night game person but here are a few quick helpers. If this is too much just start with 1, 2, and 3.

1. Have a plan in place as to where you will take the girl to have sex. Logistics ahead of time is very important.
2. Watch for girls who make heavy eye contact with you. They are interested and if you find them attractive you should approach them.
3. Once you introduce yourself and talk for a little while move her to a more isolated place. This is real important to get her away from others so you can escalate without others stopping you.
4. Set up a reason to go to your place. For instance tell her about your record collection or other thing you have that is of minor interest. It really is not important what it is except it should not be about sex. This is just an excuse for her to visit your place. Girls need an excuse so they don't feel like a slut.
5. Move her to another location like outside for a smoke or other place away from others. The more you get her to comply the more likely she will be willing to leave with you.
6. Throughout the process touch her. Start at her elbow, hands or back. Move to more sexual places like her lower back, neck or legs. If you get resistance than start over.
7. After some more conversation ask her to go see your record collection or whatever.

I mentioned your fundamental may be lacking. This is why.

Regardless, I'm not quite sure if girls find me attractive enough for my approaches to work. When I do, the girls will always talk to me for awhile, but always end up walking away at some point. I've gotten four numbers in the past three months out of many approaches, none of which has gone anywhere

Fundamentals not only include looks but several other things. See this article. https://www.girlschase.com/content/great ... ntangibles. Once you get this things better the issue with girls walking away will get better. One important note is that this is a numbers game. Every guy will have a success ration. Even the best are between 5 and 10%. So don't get hung up on individual failures. Success will happen and more so the more girls you approach.

Good luck

SGent

 

[MB67]

Hey sorry the reply took a couple days been busy with school and football.

Okay so the club was pretty awesome and we all had a good time. I walked in and a gorgeous redhead girl I'd met about a month ago in another club ran up and hugged me, took a selfie then went off to find her friends and asked me to find her later on. Unfortunately I never did. I didn't really approach that night, to be honest. I had a girl who's friends with another team groupie dance with me for a bit but I ended up losing her in the crowd. Another girl pulled me out from our group, did some jaeger bombs with me, took a few pictures then ran off. Another one took a drink from my hand, downed it and took a few pictures. I asked her if she'd like to do some shots but she declined. The night was basically a stream of that and hanging out with my teammates. An exchange student from France who's friends with us danced with me for a bit, and I did definitely get more attention from other girls in the room after that. I'd say I was approached by six or seven girls I didn't know, and about an equal number I did, though that was platonic. The general way they went though was that we'd do a drink, take a picture, they'd kiss my cheek dance with me a bit then move on.

I'd say I'm pretty comfortable talking to women, I don't get anxiety or anything like that. I guess what I need to work on is how to keep them from wandering off after I have their attention.

 

[Sophisticated Gent]

MB67

Glad you got back to us. There is definitely an issue with your interaction with the girls. Give us a detailed interaction that is typical. This includes dialogue, body language, touching etc. I have a couple of guess what is wrong but without details they are just guesses. With all this attention you should be getting laid regularly.

Note how having the French girl dance with you raised your social value. That is why I recommended inviting outside girls to your parties. This has two advantages. One you have a shot with the outside girl and second you get increased social value with the girls in your circle. The more often you bring different outside girls in the more the circle girls with increase their interest in you. Girls are competitive. Your social girls are very competitive being cheerleaders. They are not going to want you to be fucking girls outside the circle so they will chase you right into their beds.

I am reading between the line that you have some anxiety issues. We all do. I think yours are being sexual with the girls. We can work through this.

SGent

 

[ray_zorse]

There are 2 things you must do to turn this around.

The first is engage them in conversation. Ex

You: how about your night so far?
Her: fine!
You: I mean u came here with some friends? went to dinner first or pregamed at someone's house or what?
Her: yeah i came with my 3 best friends we hang out together a lot
You: ohh are they as cute as you? (wink) yeah how did u meet those friends?
Her: ohh well blahblah was my flatmate when I first moved here and then blahblahblah (explaining and sharing)
(now you're talking and she's a LITTLE invested in the interaction, see how this works?)

The second is MOVE her. Ex

You: we seem to be in the way here, lets move over
(takes her hand and leads her a few metres further up the bar)
Her: blahblahblah (still sharing)
(a bit later)
You: lets go out the front where I can hear you better (grabs her hand again and moves her)

This is how you get buy-in, otherwise the interaction means little to her. BTW don't let girls take your drink and don't buy them shots.

Ray

 

[Bboy100]

I got the same impression of you as Radeng. Read these two articles:
https://www.girlschase.com/content/genui ... rogant-man
https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-g ... ampus-game

I'm not 100% sure that I advocate going to as far an extreme as they suggest. But they definitely give you a good idea of what direction you should be headed in.

 

[Sophisticated Gent]

Since the other guys jumped in I will go ahead and make my guesses.

First your interactions are most likely to much small talk. Stuff like, how are you? Are you having fun? Is that a new outfit? I like your hair. These are great for openers but the conversation needs to get into learning about her. We call this deep diving. It shows that you are significantly interested in her. This is what ray_zorse is talking about. Get past the fluff. Find out where she is from, what she likes to do outside of the club, what her normal day is like, what her major is and why she chose it. Most of this will be done once you have gotten her to move away from the friends. A little needs to be done before the move to get her invested. Invested means she has put some effort into you such as telling you about herself. Let her do most of the talking. Keep yourself a mystery. Once you have a little investment then you need to move her.

Moving her is absolutely necessary. Ray_zorse also states this in caps. This is done to isolate you two away from others so you can carry on deeper conversations and get into sexual framing and sexual conversations. Second it gets her used to following you and doing as you say. One of the highest concerns of girls is being thought of as a slut. By isolating her you remove a lot of this concern. Once isolated you can continue the conversation, learn more about her, set up an excuse for her to go to your place and have a sexual conversation. Before you do have a sexual conversation read the two articles below. If you do this wrong you will screw yourself with her. Usually you will need to move her a couple of times before you move her to your sex location. This depends on the girl. If she is really into you and turned on (horny) you can move her faster. When you move in a club some ideas are to first move to an isolated table or bar. Or maybe a smoking area. Next move her outside or new a new bar or place to have a drink. Maybe go for a walk. If you pull place (where you plan on having sex) is near the club then walk towards your place. Always keep up the conversation during the move. Note this is the one time you want to dominate the conversation. During the physical move from one location to the next you need to keep talking and entertaining. This is to distract her from where you are going. Otherwise just let her talk to keep her investing in you. You will lead the conversation by asking questions and throwing in funny stuff once in awhile. Once she is used to moving with you it is time to move her to you pull place. Remember this from my previous response?

4. Set up a reason to go to your place. For instance tell her about your record collection or other thing you have that is of minor interest. It really is not important what it is except it should not be about sex. This is just an excuse for her to visit your place. Girls need an excuse so they don't feel like a slut.

It is time to use the reason. Some of the guys also say "I know a better place with excellent cheap drinks. Let's go there." Of course this is your place. Note that I didn't ask if she wanted to go there. I lead by saying let's go there. She can and may refuse but you have reduced the slut factor by giving her an excuse and by leading. Girls are not stupid so she will know what is going down.

https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-u ... e-and-mood
https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-u ... case-study

I and the guys have given you a lot to digest and put into practice. At first all of this may be overwhelming but it will become second nature to you. To summarized, change you attitude by becoming more alpha dominate (a dick as rageng says), get into deeper conversations and move her. As you make these changes you will find the cheerleaders will chase you.

SGent