- Joined
- Jul 14, 2013
- Messages
- 230
I met Ashley last week at the gym. Used a genuine compliment opener after stalling for ~20 mins or so. Of course, noone else hits on girls at the gym, so no biggie. Ashley is a 20 yo blonde with a sexy athletic ass studying physical therapy. She was thankful for my compliment and a little reserved. I let her get back to the workout after my opener and then got her number after I was done with my routine. Here I noticed that she had pimples, etc, on her face, but still quite pretty.
I tried to set the date up for before New Year's, but she was busy, so we agreed to meet up on January 2nd. I decided to experiment with a sexual frame by texting her the following the previous night after we had agreed on place/time:
We both were running late for our date at a local cafe (she lives in the neighborhood I'm staying at over winter break). She wound up coming about 15 minutes later than I did.
She walks in: makeup, a nice blouse highlighting her bosom, nails, the whole she-bang. She also still has braces..
I deep-dive her and it's mostly me asking questions and her answering briefly. I then relate with stories of my own regarding the topic at hand. For example, we relate about the student body at our respective universities. Also, she’s an immigrant from the same region I am, so we relate about that. I missed an opportunity here to ask her about her father, because she lives with step-dad and mom. I didn’t do it because I’m still in the mindset that it’s impolite to ask people personal questions like this (what nonsesnse). I think if I would have related with something personal from my life, she would have been comfortable talking about her dad/stepdad.
Also, the logistics at the cafe weren't optimal - it was crowded and we sat at a table facing each other. The only thing I could do was touch her hands, but didn't. Reading some of Anatman's FR's/LR's, I realize I might have tried letting her invest some into the conversation, as well, by just pausing, looking into her eyes and allowing her to ask me things.
https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?f=5&t=4976
On the other hand, she is a good 10 years younger than me, so may not be as socially calibrated and may have just been shy.
She finishes her smoothie and I pay for us both (figured that this was OK since she's younger and I invited her and it wasn't a biggie. This set a shitty precedent, however. Read on.). I finally hug her when we exit the cafe. Then I say:
I got annihilated in this frame encounter. I just didn't have a quick come-back and my knee-jerk reaction was to acquiesce and see where there interaction would go from there. We strolled on the boardwalk and then sat down at a bench with a view of the sea. I think she was expecting me to kiss her, but I didn't. Instead I did some light kino, asking her about her rings. She got bored of this and suggested we keep walking.
After another 5 min of walking away from my house, I tell her that I gotta take a leak and we turn back. She suggests that I can go in the library, which we do. There's a little bit more touch now. After the library, we relate about reggae music (I write down some suggestions she has), and then I tell her:
She says she wants to watch a movie in the theater. I tell her that I gotta get the car keys from my house. Here is where I'm about to make my biggest mistake. We come into the apartment building I'm staying at and I open the door. We go into the elevator and she standing in one corner and I'm standing in the other, slightly averting her gaze. She wasn't eyeballing me, but in retrospect now, I HAD TO ESCALATE HEREj
After reading all the material on this site, if there's one thing to learn is that seduction is about leading and being dominant! Instead, I pussied out, rationalizing it with the idea that I wanted to make her comfortable first coming up to my pad and that I would escalate later.
I didn't kiss her in the elevator and I didn't kiss her when we came into the apartment to get the car keys.
I finally found my balls after we go back downstairs into the garage. We get into the car and after fumbling with the keyes I finally go for the kiss. She had such gentle lips. We kissed for only a minute and then she said we should prob. get going to catch the movie.
We kissed again in the movie theater parking lot before the movie. I paid for the movie for both of us (ouch!)...Chode move.
During the movie, I brushed her leg intermittently and touched her hand once, but she didn't take any initiative with touch.
I got into the wrong headspace as a result. Instead of taking two hours strategizing how to keep escalating with her, I decided that I would leave it up to her to express whether she wanted to keep hanging out. So after we got into the car, I gave her a choice.
My heart sank and I didn't counter. When I pulled up to her house she already opened the door before I initiated another make-out session for another 2 minutes.
What happened is actually pretty simple. I was intimated because she was very pretty and had a banging body, something I'm not yet used to Thus, I played it safe. Definitely not a sign of leadership and dominance.
I messed up my biggest shot at seducing her when she came upstairs with me. The reason I didn't pull the trigger is probably because I didn't want to appear inconsistent..... I couldn't reconcile how I would delay/not go to the theater after I had already told her we'd go. Of course, I could have avoided this altogether by countering with the following when she refused go to my house after the cafe:
I also missed a major opportunity to sexualize the interaction by saying something along the lines of:
Or, I may have gone full-on direct Anatman style. That would have dissipated any doubts she had regarding whether I am boyfriend material:
I was really bummed about the result of the date and then went out to do night-game, but I just couldn't put myself into the mindset of having fun. I paid $20 for a club that turned out to have mediocre music and mostly black people (Not really attracted to black girls).
I sat there on the sidelines asking myself if I was a racist for not being able to get into black chicks. Haha!
Decided to go to another part of town that was chock full of hotties dressed to the 9s walking around, but I just failed to challenge myself and eventually went home half-assedly opening only 1 girl.
I texted Ashley an hour ago (no response), since there's nothing to lose:
I wonder if she kissed me out of a sense of obligation, or whether I could have achieved success had I escalated like a man. We will never know, folks. Luckily there are ~3 billion+ more women out there for me to keep bettering myself.
I tried to set the date up for before New Year's, but she was busy, so we agreed to meet up on January 2nd. I decided to experiment with a sexual frame by texting her the following the previous night after we had agreed on place/time:
I'm looking forward to it. And wear something sexy - as much as winter permits
We both were running late for our date at a local cafe (she lives in the neighborhood I'm staying at over winter break). She wound up coming about 15 minutes later than I did.
She walks in: makeup, a nice blouse highlighting her bosom, nails, the whole she-bang. She also still has braces..
I deep-dive her and it's mostly me asking questions and her answering briefly. I then relate with stories of my own regarding the topic at hand. For example, we relate about the student body at our respective universities. Also, she’s an immigrant from the same region I am, so we relate about that. I missed an opportunity here to ask her about her father, because she lives with step-dad and mom. I didn’t do it because I’m still in the mindset that it’s impolite to ask people personal questions like this (what nonsesnse). I think if I would have related with something personal from my life, she would have been comfortable talking about her dad/stepdad.
Also, the logistics at the cafe weren't optimal - it was crowded and we sat at a table facing each other. The only thing I could do was touch her hands, but didn't. Reading some of Anatman's FR's/LR's, I realize I might have tried letting her invest some into the conversation, as well, by just pausing, looking into her eyes and allowing her to ask me things.
https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?f=5&t=4976
On the other hand, she is a good 10 years younger than me, so may not be as socially calibrated and may have just been shy.
She finishes her smoothie and I pay for us both (figured that this was OK since she's younger and I invited her and it wasn't a biggie. This set a shitty precedent, however. Read on.). I finally hug her when we exit the cafe. Then I say:
I got annihilated in this frame encounter. I just didn't have a quick come-back and my knee-jerk reaction was to acquiesce and see where there interaction would go from there. We strolled on the boardwalk and then sat down at a bench with a view of the sea. I think she was expecting me to kiss her, but I didn't. Instead I did some light kino, asking her about her rings. She got bored of this and suggested we keep walking.
After another 5 min of walking away from my house, I tell her that I gotta take a leak and we turn back. She suggests that I can go in the library, which we do. There's a little bit more touch now. After the library, we relate about reggae music (I write down some suggestions she has), and then I tell her:
She says she wants to watch a movie in the theater. I tell her that I gotta get the car keys from my house. Here is where I'm about to make my biggest mistake. We come into the apartment building I'm staying at and I open the door. We go into the elevator and she standing in one corner and I'm standing in the other, slightly averting her gaze. She wasn't eyeballing me, but in retrospect now, I HAD TO ESCALATE HEREj
After reading all the material on this site, if there's one thing to learn is that seduction is about leading and being dominant! Instead, I pussied out, rationalizing it with the idea that I wanted to make her comfortable first coming up to my pad and that I would escalate later.
I didn't kiss her in the elevator and I didn't kiss her when we came into the apartment to get the car keys.
I finally found my balls after we go back downstairs into the garage. We get into the car and after fumbling with the keyes I finally go for the kiss. She had such gentle lips. We kissed for only a minute and then she said we should prob. get going to catch the movie.
We kissed again in the movie theater parking lot before the movie. I paid for the movie for both of us (ouch!)...Chode move.
During the movie, I brushed her leg intermittently and touched her hand once, but she didn't take any initiative with touch.
I got into the wrong headspace as a result. Instead of taking two hours strategizing how to keep escalating with her, I decided that I would leave it up to her to express whether she wanted to keep hanging out. So after we got into the car, I gave her a choice.
My heart sank and I didn't counter. When I pulled up to her house she already opened the door before I initiated another make-out session for another 2 minutes.
What happened is actually pretty simple. I was intimated because she was very pretty and had a banging body, something I'm not yet used to Thus, I played it safe. Definitely not a sign of leadership and dominance.
I messed up my biggest shot at seducing her when she came upstairs with me. The reason I didn't pull the trigger is probably because I didn't want to appear inconsistent..... I couldn't reconcile how I would delay/not go to the theater after I had already told her we'd go. Of course, I could have avoided this altogether by countering with the following when she refused go to my house after the cafe:
I also missed a major opportunity to sexualize the interaction by saying something along the lines of:
Or, I may have gone full-on direct Anatman style. That would have dissipated any doubts she had regarding whether I am boyfriend material:
I was really bummed about the result of the date and then went out to do night-game, but I just couldn't put myself into the mindset of having fun. I paid $20 for a club that turned out to have mediocre music and mostly black people (Not really attracted to black girls).
I sat there on the sidelines asking myself if I was a racist for not being able to get into black chicks. Haha!
Decided to go to another part of town that was chock full of hotties dressed to the 9s walking around, but I just failed to challenge myself and eventually went home half-assedly opening only 1 girl.
I texted Ashley an hour ago (no response), since there's nothing to lose:
I wonder if she kissed me out of a sense of obligation, or whether I could have achieved success had I escalated like a man. We will never know, folks. Luckily there are ~3 billion+ more women out there for me to keep bettering myself.
