Date Plans House Dinner Dates

[StrayDog]

Howdy gents, I have been really focusing on my date sequencing in general as I have noticed that a lot of dates that didn't pan out had a lot to do with how I lead the sequencing.


Any way, I am curious how you guys sequence dates where you go to hers or she comes to yours to cook dinner together.

Some snags in Timing I have run into before is the pacing that cooking and eating requires. I have found that sometimes when you put that up front of the date by time the whole dinner procces is over, momentum has died a bit.

Pushing cooking back further in the date can sometimes put a bit of a time constraint on things, and can get in the way when momentum gets high.

Obviously the dinner it self is just a plausible deniability, so when you cook and eat is ultimately flexible based on the energy between you two. But pacing and sequencing still count for a lot.

Also, yes you she is at your house or has invited you over so conventional wisdom would be escalate ASAP. But it isn't always appropriate to just jump in and you still have to grease the wheels.

Any thoughts?

 

[Zoro]

I personally don't like the at home dinner date because of the problems you listed. Add feeling bloated or gassy, breath smells, and the overly romantic feel and things are not in your favor.

However, you just need something else for good plausible deniability.

I have just said, "I have a cozy place" before. Telling her I will dominate her in Mario Kart. Showing her something of common interest (music instruments, astrology book to look up compatibility). Telling her I can teach her to do XYZ (drawing, play an instrument)

I've also just mentioned that it's nice to walk around the area around my place.

Or you could still use food/snacks. Just something less involved like smoothies, wine, kombucha, ice cream, chocolate, etc.

Netflix and chill is a classic, maybe just don't use those words. "Oh you're into XYZ? I've been wanting to get into that..."

The best excuse is not needing one at all. I've invited girls over without giving a reason beyond the obvious one that we wanted to hang out. Remember that getting that mutual interest vibe down is what matters most. The other stuff is just helping things along when it's not there. Although often in a good vibe like that there naturally will be extra excuses to meet up.

 

[StrayDog]

I personally don't like the at home dinner date because of the problems you listed. Add feeling bloated or gassy, breath smells, and the overly romantic feel and things are not in your favor.

However, you just need something else for good plausible deniability.

I have just said, "I have a cozy place" before. Telling her I will dominate her in Mario Kart. Showing her something of common interest (music instruments, astrology book to look up compatibility). Telling her I can teach her to do XYZ (drawing, play an instrument)

I've also just mentioned that it's nice to walk around the area around my place.

Or you could still use food/snacks. Just something less involved like smoothies, wine, kombucha, ice cream, chocolate, etc.

Netflix and chill is a classic, maybe just don't use those words. "Oh you're into XYZ? I've been wanting to get into that..."

The best excuse is not needing one at all. I've invited girls over without giving a reason beyond the obvious one that we wanted to hang out. Remember that getting that mutual interest vibe down is what matters most. The other stuff is just helping things along when it's not there. Although often in a good vibe like that there naturally will be extra excuses to meet up.

Totally and come to think of it I rarely have ever done the home dinner date. It's just something that comes up from time to time. And this gal suggested it to me recently so I wanted to get some pointers.

Now that you mention it, there was a period where most of the dates I had were inviting women over, and I rarely (if ever) suggested dinner. They would come over no questions.

That said, even then home dates of any variety have a natural sequencing built in. And again isn't always "well lets hop to it".

It's a bit different from going three bounce on a more tradition seductive date, as you are not moving as much.

Any thoughts on that. Observations on pacing?

One thing you can always do is take a walk at the start of the date. Run second gen as you start to get back.

Obviously you could always start at a coffee shop near by. but that isn't always a logistical option. (right now my logistics are off, and my place is a temporary no go, so I'm having to go to hers any way). So I am more so talking about the pacing of dates that are strictly home invites. And ones that still need some finessing before escalation.

 

[Will_V]

Howdy gents, I have been really focusing on my date sequencing in general as I have noticed that a lot of dates that didn't pan out had a lot to do with how I lead the sequencing.


Any way, I am curious how you guys sequence dates where you go to hers or she comes to yours to cook dinner together.

Some snags in Timing I have run into before is the pacing that cooking and eating requires. I have found that sometimes when you put that up front of the date by time the whole dinner procces is over, momentum has died a bit.

Pushing cooking back further in the date can sometimes put a bit of a time constraint on things, and can get in the way when momentum gets high.

Obviously the dinner it self is just a plausible deniability, so when you cook and eat is ultimately flexible based on the energy between you two. But pacing and sequencing still count for a lot.

Also, yes you she is at your house or has invited you over so conventional wisdom would be escalate ASAP. But it isn't always appropriate to just jump in and you still have to grease the wheels.

Any thoughts?

I only ever do it on a second date or later, if either she couldn't get comfortable enough the first time and it didn't happen, or it did happen and I just want to vibe with her some more this time.

I like to keep things very open ended on the first time, you don't know what sort of girl she is and what associations she has with it. It's the sort of thing too that a girl can easily think 'wow that sounds great!' and then either get bored or end up sitting around with you doing the work - and then if you cancel it's a bit weird.

It's only for the kind of girl that gets that sort of thing, usually the more feminine, homely, submissive types.

 

[Zoro]

That said, even then home dates of any variety have a natural sequencing built in. And again isn't always "well lets hop to it".

It's a bit different from going three bounce on a more tradition seductive date, as you are not moving as much.

Any thoughts on that. Observations on pacing?

When thinking on this, I have a natural tendency of my personality to "get cozy". First thing I do when I get home is change into lounge wear ( not on a date, although there is this Russian PUA who changes into a robe and has an extra for the girl! maybe I should start doing that).

I'm realizing now I tend to bring girls into this vibe because it's just how I prefer to chill, so we will tend to find ourselves conversing, or doing whatever activity we planned on, in a cozy way. Meaning close together, comfortable, relaxed, slow, all good stuff for building connection and a seductive vibe. Put on some music with some quality speakers that matches that vibe (I like trance, synthwave, or something similar with a nice beat and some bass. Reminder by the Weeknd or Somebody Else by the 1975 comes to mind). I also prefer mood lighting whether i'm alone or on a date, so that is also a part of the vibe. Blankets. Tea.

I actually do not like anything on the TV. It tends to suck up attention and distract from the seductive vibe. Even if it's music videos.

I don't do all this at once. Might look like this. Come home, get settled in (water, bathroom), light convo, get into the activity, after activity sit on couch and put on music, get physically closer, add on the cozy (tea, blankets), escalate.


I'm laughing as I'm writing this, because I'm seeing clearly now why I can have trouble with higher energy girls. They just don't relate to the Cozy.

But instead of slowing down, there are ways to maintain the seductive vibe. Dancing to the music, light escalation while doing whatever activity, playing a simple game (pillow fight, mario kart, uno, thumb wars, staring contest, truth or dare). I always like to add stakes to the game. Loser drinks, loser does a dare, loser loses a piece of clothing, etc.

One thing you can always do is take a walk at the start of the date. Run second gen as you start to get back.

I've had home dates where we walked around first. I think if I can feel there is just too much energy, I go for this to spend some of it.

I've also had home dates where escalation was possible very soon. Her body language is useful gauge. Facing you straight on, doesn't fill the silence, very compliant. Time to escalate. But pace it, tease her a bit. Don't forget the oven needs time to warm up lol.

PS.

A really great sounding and cheap bluetooth speaker is the wonderboom 2. I love this thing. Could easily bring something like that to her place since you said you're going there. Don't underestimate the power of music on the vibe.

Listening to Hold On, We're Going Home by Drake right now. Another panty dropper.

 

[Skills]

Horrible idea... Coming home is to fuck ..fuck that making dinner shit! What is this Martha Stewart game... And to use as plausible is no needed...brah invite her over for whatever, wine, movies to meet your dog to pick you up, to see your paintings etc... If she declined adress it once, you can bring the pepper spray...if she declines a second time... I got you many creepy guys have ruined it for Guys like me, lets meet at Starbucks or whatever coffee place then do 3 bounce... I will link stuff later...

 

[StrayDog]

Horrible idea... Coming home is to fuck ..fuck that making dinner shit! What is this Martha Stewart game... And to use as plausible is no needed...brah invite her over for whatever, wine, movies to meet your dog to pick you up, to see your paintings etc... If she declined adress it once, you can bring the pepper spray...if she declines a second time... I got you many creepy guys have ruined it for Guys like me, lets meet at Starbucks or whatever coffee place then do 3 bounce... I will link stuff

I feel you skills

 

[POB]

Horrible idea... Coming home is to fuck ..fuck that making dinner shit! What is this Martha Stewart game... And to use as plausible is no needed...brah invite her over for whatever, wine, movies to meet your dog to pick you up, to see your paintings etc... If she declined adress it once, you can bring the pepper spray...if she declines a second time... I got you many creepy guys have ruined it for Guys like me, lets meet at Starbucks or whatever coffee place then do 3 bounce... I will link stuff later...

This is so funny!
Almost ALL my home dates involve cooking.
Why?
Because I like to cook, and make it very clear at our first interaction.

My guess is that the activity is irrelevant, as long as you are congruent, doing what you like,
setting sexual tones, and progressing the escalation with the right pace.

As soon as they arrive, I give them a big and long sensual kiss, then break it to start at the kitchen.
Then, when I have a break, I hug them from behind and start to kiss them on the neck,
making sure to rub my hard cock on their asses.
Usually from there we progress to sex as soon as we have to wait for the food to be done.
Round two as soon as we are finished with the food.
Never had a problem with that sequence.

P.S. men that cook give provider vibes....that said, it's usually better to lean more on your
playerish side when setting up cooking dates to balance that

 

[Skills]

This is so funny!
Almost ALL my home dates involve cooking.
Why?
Because I like to cook, and make it very clear at our first interaction.

My guess is that the activity is irrelevant, as long as you are congruent, doing what you like,
setting sexual tones, and progressing the escalation with the right pace.

As soon as they arrive, I give them a big and long sensual kiss, then break it to start at the kitchen.
Then, when I have a break, I hug them from behind and start to kiss them on the neck,
making sure to rub my hard cock on their asses.
Usually from there we progress to sex as soon as we have to wait for the food to be done.
Round two as soon as we are finished with the food.
Never had a problem with that sequence.

P.S. men that cook give provider vibes....that said, it's usually better to lean more on your
playerish side when setting up cooking dates to balance that

I knew you were going to say this cause you followed at times bd model of 2 dates and second date dinner, but dinner to be honest not ideal...

Same point I was making to thomino and dww, cause people can get laid doing some things doesn't make it necessary optimal...

I had a student he was a chefs he got laid with the cooking dinner angle congruent and smooth cause he was an actual cheft a lot of guys got laid with bd model of dinner back at home, but no necessary optimal but the masses due to provider vibes, a bit of courtship vibes, and is not really necessary the time, effort and money specially in us food very expensive....

 

[POB]

Same point I was making to thomino and dww, cause people can get laid doing some things doesn't make it necessary optimal...

You are right, it's not optimal...but cooking is damn fun when you mix it with seduction.
And fucking after you have a great meal improves the release of all the pleasure hormones.
(as long as you don't binge, of course)
Plus I never have had a girl give me LMR on a full belly lol