Hello fellas. Not too long ago I dated this 18 year old (I was 26) girl, lets call her Lisa, for 2 months. Recently, 5 months later we reconnected. I had been going through a dry spell, and texted her to catch up, grab dinner at my place, and rekindle our passion. When we hung out this time, she seemed like a completely different girl. My question for today is whether or not I impacted this change in her? Although I ended things between us, was she telling me stuff to up her ego?
Background info when we dated
I met Lisa through cold approach at an event one Saturday evening. We became lovers in two dates, after a short coffee 1st date, and cooking dinner for the 2nd. During the the two months we dated, I only saw her once a week. Our dates usually consisted of nothing more than me making a meal and us making love (many rounds over). After hanging out for two months, I ended things between us. Before she left one day, she asked the typical "what are we question." I replied that I liked her but that the age gap was too much to bear. Truthfully, if she was 21 or older, I would of dated her, but I wanted a girl who I could grab a drink with, a more certain future professionally, and had a bit more real world experience. At the time, Lisa was just finishing her first semester of community college.
Lisa was super sweet to me, and seemed like a positive innocent girl. She mentioned that our first date was the first time that anyone had taken her out on a real date (more than netflix and chill). She didn't seem that experienced in bed, and I never did manage to get her to come, but she always had a high sex drive and seemed to be enjoying it, wildly.
Fast-forward to a few weeks ago
When I first saw her again for our dinner date at my place, she seemed like a completely different girl. Her hair was all done up, with blonde highlights. When we were seeing each other, her hair was never done up besides in a simple pony tail, though, she did have that silky straight Asian hair. Her hair made her look hotter, and older too. Once we started talking, I quickly learned that more than her hair had changed.
She opened up that she has been suffering from depression for a while, and 1 month after we stopped seeing each other, she tried to commit suicide, and had to go to the ER (when we hung out, she mentioned once that she didn't go to school for two weeks of senior year of high school, I believe due to depression, but can't remember for certain). Shortly after, she dropped out of community college, and quit her part-time job at the cinema. She's been seeing a therapist ever since. Part of her therapy has her spending the upcoming summer at her Grandma's home in her home country in Asia (she came her when she was 10, is very Americanized, with no accent). When I asked what causes her depression, she said she doesn't feel she has self-worth, and at the time didn't feel like she wanted to continue. At present she lives with her mom and older brother (her parent's divorced when she was very young, her father was never in her life, and she said she's never felt close to her mom as her Grandma raised her in Asia for a few years while her mom worked in the U.S.). Later in the conversation, she mentioned that she felt like she was mostly raised by her grandma and never felt close to her mom.
She also mentioned that she started dating this guy from the community college, her lab partner, the last few months. When I asked her why she decided to come see me again, she said that it was because her boyfriend broke up with her a week before. She told me how she still liked him. While making dinner, he texted her asking how she was doing, and asked what she should do. Later she also opened up how she used tinder to find a girl for a threesome for her and her bf, but didn't say one way or the other if it actually happened. She also stated that the guy was so good looking that it would turn me gay (which I took as boosting her ego).
Lastly, she told me how some guy asked for her number at H&M the day we were meeting. She also asked how to meet guys in the Asian country she was returning to for the summer, (as I had previously lived there before). I replied she'd find nothing more than creepy old white men with money, and she said she couldn't wait to try new things.
In that night, we still had 3 or 4 sessions of love making, and she wanted to go longer every time. She seemed more experienced in bed this time around. When we started making out, she asked if I could call her daddy. That, to me, was a sign that either she was suffering from her dad not being in her life, her ex-bf called her that, or both.
What is going on with her?
If anyone has insight into this girl, please share. Did her losing me cause some of her depression? Was she telling me most of this stuff to up her ego? Although I ended things, how can I better screen for a low self esteem girl? When we met up 5 months later, I felt like I was talking to a completely different girl. I couldn't tell if she bent the truth with guys and was using that to make me jealous or what. I recently read the book Practical Female Psychology (I highly recommend it), and soon realized that she was a LSE girl through and through. When we used to hang out, this never crossed my mind. I'm assuming that a lot of it, sadly, has to do with her father and mother not playing a prominent role in her life.
Background info when we dated
I met Lisa through cold approach at an event one Saturday evening. We became lovers in two dates, after a short coffee 1st date, and cooking dinner for the 2nd. During the the two months we dated, I only saw her once a week. Our dates usually consisted of nothing more than me making a meal and us making love (many rounds over). After hanging out for two months, I ended things between us. Before she left one day, she asked the typical "what are we question." I replied that I liked her but that the age gap was too much to bear. Truthfully, if she was 21 or older, I would of dated her, but I wanted a girl who I could grab a drink with, a more certain future professionally, and had a bit more real world experience. At the time, Lisa was just finishing her first semester of community college.
Lisa was super sweet to me, and seemed like a positive innocent girl. She mentioned that our first date was the first time that anyone had taken her out on a real date (more than netflix and chill). She didn't seem that experienced in bed, and I never did manage to get her to come, but she always had a high sex drive and seemed to be enjoying it, wildly.
Fast-forward to a few weeks ago
When I first saw her again for our dinner date at my place, she seemed like a completely different girl. Her hair was all done up, with blonde highlights. When we were seeing each other, her hair was never done up besides in a simple pony tail, though, she did have that silky straight Asian hair. Her hair made her look hotter, and older too. Once we started talking, I quickly learned that more than her hair had changed.
She opened up that she has been suffering from depression for a while, and 1 month after we stopped seeing each other, she tried to commit suicide, and had to go to the ER (when we hung out, she mentioned once that she didn't go to school for two weeks of senior year of high school, I believe due to depression, but can't remember for certain). Shortly after, she dropped out of community college, and quit her part-time job at the cinema. She's been seeing a therapist ever since. Part of her therapy has her spending the upcoming summer at her Grandma's home in her home country in Asia (she came her when she was 10, is very Americanized, with no accent). When I asked what causes her depression, she said she doesn't feel she has self-worth, and at the time didn't feel like she wanted to continue. At present she lives with her mom and older brother (her parent's divorced when she was very young, her father was never in her life, and she said she's never felt close to her mom as her Grandma raised her in Asia for a few years while her mom worked in the U.S.). Later in the conversation, she mentioned that she felt like she was mostly raised by her grandma and never felt close to her mom.
She also mentioned that she started dating this guy from the community college, her lab partner, the last few months. When I asked her why she decided to come see me again, she said that it was because her boyfriend broke up with her a week before. She told me how she still liked him. While making dinner, he texted her asking how she was doing, and asked what she should do. Later she also opened up how she used tinder to find a girl for a threesome for her and her bf, but didn't say one way or the other if it actually happened. She also stated that the guy was so good looking that it would turn me gay (which I took as boosting her ego).
Lastly, she told me how some guy asked for her number at H&M the day we were meeting. She also asked how to meet guys in the Asian country she was returning to for the summer, (as I had previously lived there before). I replied she'd find nothing more than creepy old white men with money, and she said she couldn't wait to try new things.
In that night, we still had 3 or 4 sessions of love making, and she wanted to go longer every time. She seemed more experienced in bed this time around. When we started making out, she asked if I could call her daddy. That, to me, was a sign that either she was suffering from her dad not being in her life, her ex-bf called her that, or both.
What is going on with her?
If anyone has insight into this girl, please share. Did her losing me cause some of her depression? Was she telling me most of this stuff to up her ego? Although I ended things, how can I better screen for a low self esteem girl? When we met up 5 months later, I felt like I was talking to a completely different girl. I couldn't tell if she bent the truth with guys and was using that to make me jealous or what. I recently read the book Practical Female Psychology (I highly recommend it), and soon realized that she was a LSE girl through and through. When we used to hang out, this never crossed my mind. I'm assuming that a lot of it, sadly, has to do with her father and mother not playing a prominent role in her life.
